What was your experience like? What red flags made you realize someone was cheating on you, and how did you avoid them?

Edited December 18, 2025Dec 18 by Strawberry Bubble

Celibacy

Don't date. In the gay community its bound to happen.

Edited December 18, 2025Dec 18 by BJ1998

Be a Maid in the living room, Chef in the kitchen, Wh0re in the bedroom.

Edited December 18, 2025Dec 18 by superglowy

2 minutes ago, BJ1998 said:

Don't date. In the gay community its bound to happen.

This type of comments really make me sad... are you being honest?

You can't control what another person does

I would start with why you feel paranoid about being "cheated on"? What does that mean? Why is that a concern? Why would your partner do that?

The next step is to have open and honest conversations with your partner. Personally, I think that everyone should discuss having an open relationship, even if neither party has any intention of acting on it. I think there is a lot of value in developing a secure relationship without the "guide rails" of monogamy. And I say this as a rather traditional monogamous gay man.

If you do this, I feel like you will be less likely to be "cheated on" because you will have created channels of continued conversation that are likely to be fruitful if your partner does ever want to or think about doing things with another person.

Edited December 18, 2025Dec 18 by byzantium

LOL. I'll never understand why people care so much about that, it's like their self-worth is determined by what other person does.

Expecting to never be cheated on is absolutely delusional.

Don't date

Not because everyone cheats, but because you can never fully control what someone else does in a relationship

2 minutes ago, suburbannature said:

You can't control what another person does

but what red flags do you think there are?

Stay single forever.

2 minutes ago, alfonso12 said:

LOL. I'll never understand why people care so much about that, it's like their self-worth is determined by what other person does.

Expecting to never be cheated on is absolutely delusional.

I forgot that being vulnerable and honest here is basically a crime.

4 minutes ago, byzantium said:

I would start with why you feel paranoid about being "cheated on"? What does that mean? Why is that a concern? Why would your partner do that?

The next step is to have open and honest conversations with your partner. Personally, I think that everyone should discuss having an open relationship, even if neither party has any intention of acting on it. I think there is a lot of value in developing a secure relationship without the "guide rails" of monogamy. And I say this as a rather traditional monogamous gay man.

If you do this, I feel like you will be less likely to be "cheated on" because you will have created channels of continued conversation that are likely to be fruitful if your partner does ever want to or think about doing things with another person.

thank you

Never date

6 minutes ago, alfonso12 said:

LOL. I'll never understand why people care so much about that, it's like their self-worth is determined by what other person does.

Expecting to never be cheated on is absolutely delusional.

Like everything is temporary. Just find someone who won't cheat on you. If you can't, love your own company.

Hard to accept - but is it?

It will happen eventually.

I mean Jay Z cheated on BEYONCÉ

Edited December 18, 2025Dec 18 by $ebert

worry about things that are in your control. otherwise it's a waste of your energy.

Everyone here being so cynical, what happened to optimism

5 minutes ago, alfonso12 said:

LOL. I'll never understand why people care so much about that, it's like their self-worth is determined by what other person does.

Expecting to never be cheated on is absolutely delusional.

Hoping your monogamous partner doesn't cheat on you doesn't equate to having low worth or low self-esteem though. You're kind of stretching here. If you're choosing to enter an exclusive relationship with someone I'd say it's a bare minimum requirement of trust. Unless you've discussed otherwise, of course. To be constantly paranoid of being cheated on might be a self-projection issue though, I'll give you that. But they're not the same thing.

Edited December 18, 2025Dec 18 by Jack!

Don't date

If it happened to Beyonce it will happen to everybody.

Cheat on him first

cheating ain't got nothing to do with you, so don't worry on what you can't control

7 minutes ago, tost1 said:

Everyone here being so cynical, what happened to optimism

what happened to radical optimism