just saw a tweet that said barbershops are scary for gay men. there's also a running joke on the gay internet of trying to be more masc before going to the barbershop

 

i don't understand nor relate to this experience... i'm not the most masc-presenting gay and most people can probably clock me as a henny from far away (i even dye my hair blond), but i've never had any issues with straight barbers. granted i've not been to THAT many salons but in my experience if you're polite they will cut your hair and send you on your way. some of them are even friendly with me and say hello to me on the street because i'm a repeat customer. 

 

so ATRL, what is your experience? are you scared of or intimidated by straight barbers? no judgement if you are, i'm just curious 

No. I don't trust women cutting my hair. 

1 minute ago, Gladiator said:

No. I don't trust women cutting my hair. 

the worst barber i've ever had was a gay man. not even because he did anything wrong with my hair, but because he was always late to the appointments  he was lovely but i had to switch on him because it was ridiculous  

no i don't wear my sexuality on my sleeve 

Edited March 16, 20251 yr by Josh

No, but I find them too time consuming. Like, women just go straight to the point, some chops and that's it in 10 minutes, meanwhile barbershops take too much time, they focus too much on small details no one cares about and are too slow while at it 

I mean, idk if it's "scary", but it's definitely something that's out of comfort zone-ish. 
 

I've been to both male and female barbers, and male barbers really do tend to try to get into talking about women: if you are dating, opinion on women, sexuality checking etc. it's awkward, and I unfortunately do actively avoid going to men barbershops at all costs, unless I'm in a pinch. Everyone's experience differs tho, this is just mine, and I'm not even fem like that.
 

female barbers don't care and when they're great, they're great. I've had the same one for near a decade. Very sweet and caring, and funny enough I rather a woman touching up on me like that.  

Idk if American barbers and foreign barbers differ in what I'm mentioning above, but maybe that's also a factor. 
 

 

Only gays on ATRL think so

i go to a girly salon so no

7 minutes ago, Donquizote said:

Only gays on ATRL think so

based on the responses here clearly not 

Scary, no. Awkward, yes. 
When I moved to a new city I had to test around with different barbers and one place was just full of insufferable conversation. Asking me if I had a wife while they talked **** about women the entire time. Like girl, hurry up and finish this fade. 

I went to the barber last weekend. I’m not scared to go. But I definitely don’t feel that comfortable there. This most recent visit had a lot of the men in the barbershop say super misogynistic things about how “hard headed” and “desperate” women are and all that. It got more vulgar than that, but I don’t care to reiterate that much. Also, to compliment my cut, I got told I’ll get all the “b****s” and “p*****s” I want. And… yeah… I just smirk and nod cause I don’t know how to respond honestly.

 

When I move here soon, I’m probably going to find a gay barber or a woman that can do my hair instead. So, I get the overall apprehension at some barbershops. Many of them can be very hyper masculine and be a bit weird to enter as a gay man. But, it really depends on the shop.

When I used to go to barbers I didn't really have this issue either. I wouldn't really talk much unless they asked me any questions. A couple of times I got asked if I had a girlfriend and I just said no.

idk but its almost impossible to get a good cut in this lame ass country no matter where u go, so thats scary.

I remember when we had just moved to Atlanta and we were trying out  different barbers 

 

one of the barbers gf had just left the shop and he was telling me she had some good ***** and he was gonna hit that 

 

I think I was in 8th grade lol. Like unc just cut my hair bro 

Edited March 16, 20251 yr by Katamari

I go to a men's salon and they have mainly women and gay barbers so no.

 

I know my way around a traditional black barber shop though. I used to have a lesbian barber too. 

Edited March 16, 20251 yr by Rotunda

it's not that they're scary for me, it's that every barber I went to as a teenager just didn't have the skillset I needed

 

i only trust a women's hairdressers to do my hair. barber shops used to give me mushroom cuts each time without fail

Only thing that's scary about them are the prices at some of them. 

Not this thread when I have an appointment in 12 hours..

 

 

I wouldn't say I find them scary per se, but growing up they were definitely the most uncomfortable place I'd go to. I've never had a bad experience personally, but the amount of toxic masculinity I was exposed to was too much (90% of the time its straight men talking about football, girls, or being casually homophobic). Thankfully I go to a queer friendly place now (although all of them are straight nnn) so I don't feel that pressure anymore. 

 

Spoiler

One time a "straight" barber kept flirting with me cause we were alone in the salon and it was the most uncomfortable experience ever. But at least he was hot and skilled.

 

 

 

Edited March 16, 20251 yr by State of Grace.

There was this one barbershop I used to go to with this Kevin hart looking barber

 

one they were discussing whether men should be praise dancers in the church 

 

another convo he had said he does not shower all of the time after crapping because it was feminine   

1 minute ago, Katamari said:

There was this one barbershop I used to go to with this Kevin hart looking barber

 

one they were discussing whether men should be praise dancers in the church 

 

another convo he had said he does not shower all of the time after crapping because it was feminine   

wtf

Nah. I haven't been to one, but I typically get along with straight men so them cutting my hair wouldn't be too scary outside of the usual anxiety of just being around new people. thankfully my mom does my hair and I have best friends who do hair, so I probably wouldn't go to one unless I see one I really like. 

6 minutes ago, Lightbringer007 said:

wtf

I love my current barbershop they know how to act in a public place

The lady who cuts my hair gets it done in 10-15 minutes with very little conversation and I wouldn't have it any other way. 

Well duh, it's $60 + tip

Im masculine and most of the barbers are gay so not really 

 

I did have one specifically that was starting to feel some attraction but he left the city, never was able to figure out if he was straight or bi.

 

When he was trimming my beard he got so close, it was hot, but well all barbers do that, he was really good too

 

It sucks he left