Hi y'all, I know this is probably a question for therapy or some professional but I can't pay $180 per session anymore and I got banned from Reddit so I can't ask /askgaybros

My boyfriend and I have been together close to 3 years now and had like a 2 year honeymoon phase and in the past year our sex life has slowed down a lot. He is vers and feels like he is missing the bottom part of his sexuality. I was verse, but had some really bad experiences with being painted on like REALLY bad years ago and it completely turned me off from topping

We both are trying to figure out how we can navigate this and stay together, I think he should go a few times a month on the apps and find a top but I don't want it to be anyone we know… and he's not really comfortable with an open relationship in general bc he had one with an ex and didn't think the experience was worth it. We also talked about maybe me getting viagra or doing PNP. We are gonna figure it out

What's you guys' experience? What rules do you have??

Please don't troll me I'm sensitive rn

7 minutes ago, Cyanide said:

I was verse, but had some really bad experiences with being painted on like REALLY bad years ago and it completely turned me off from topping

Wait what does being painted on mea-

Oh

Open relationship as in... dating until you find a replacement while you share expenses with your roommate you 'love'.

Good luck!

12 minutes ago, Toxic Love said:

Wait what does being painted on mea-

Oh

No girl it was awful. Some Latino bottom painted an entire Picasso painting on me and left a **** hand print on my WALL after that I just don't want to

No and never will.

Xoxo.

4 minutes ago, AxelFox said:

Open relationship as in... dating until you find a replacement while you share expenses with your roommate you 'love'.

Good luck!

I don't mind whatever opinions people may have, but I'm curious about people's experiences

have you had this dynamic and what went wrong?

I think we both feel really bad about ourselves and guilty but it's nobody's fault

Edited June 1Jun 1 by Cyanide

I know older gay couples who've been in sexually open relationships for decades and who wouldn't want to "find a replacement while they share expenses with the roommate they 'love'" for anything in the world, they are very much in love and happy lmao

My best friend and his husband have been in a monogamous relationship for 10 years now

My fiancé and I are sexually open for a year now, after 5 years, on a don't ask don't tell basis and we still have sex with eachother

I know monogamous gay and straight couples that had the WORST, most dramatic and crushing break ups known to man kind (my previous two relationships being like that)

I know open gay and straight couples who went up in absolute flames

What I'm saying is: if a relationship is meant to endure, it will. If it's not meant to endure, it won't. Regardless of whether you're sexually open or not.

Good luck either way, sis! We all need it in this crazy world trying to keep it all together.

Edited June 1Jun 1 by fantafantanocoke

Never have. Never will.

As for your situation, try toys on him for now.

PNP? girl!

the last time i tried an open relationship it ended with the guy me and my ex used to bang a few times becoming the regular boyfriend and me being alone and depressed so yeah good luck

37 minutes ago, Cyanide said:

doing PNP

18 minutes ago, Cyanide said:

Some Latino bottom painted an entire Picasso painting on me and left a **** hand print on my WALL

Lily Allen.

20 minutes ago, yonsé said:

PNP? girl!

15 minutes ago, ONOPKA said:

I know, I'm literally talking to a dealer rn

But which drugs make you horny? I don't want to do meth or GHB

19 minutes ago, Robburro said:

the last time i tried an open relationship it ended with the guy me and my ex used to bang a few times becoming the regular boyfriend and me being alone and depressed so yeah good luck

My worst fear

Definitely do PNP

i would go into an open relationship under the conditions that I'm able to explore other guys and he finds satisfaction in just watching our cats at home and not see anyone.

Edited June 1Jun 1 by fememeist

My goodness!!! No, of course not!!! The whorishness is far too much!

I would obviously do an open relationship. First I would need to be in a relationship. But I find time and time again that there are no men in the world for me. I don't think I'll be dating any time soon.

If the guy is hot what's the problem of being painted on? Like if I like someone they can pee on me, take a dump on me, and whatever else floats your boat.

9 minutes ago, selena_lavigne said:

I would obviously do an open relationship. First I would need to be in a relationship. But I find time and time again that there are no men in the world for me. I don't think I'll be dating any time soon.

If the guy is hot what's the problem of being painted on? Like if I like someone they can pee on me, take a dump on me, and whatever else floats your boat.

Not the response I was expecting at all

1 hour ago, Cyanide said:

No girl it was awful. Some Latino bottom painted an entire Picasso painting on me and left a **** hand print on my WALL after that I just don't want to

Jump in my painted windows, baby, let's go
My eyes look like a Picasso, let it all go
Jump in my painted windows, wanna see my soul
I'll show ya, I can love ya

No, there's no love there.

Girl just top him once in a while, it's just doodoo. You would rather let your bf get f*cked by random strangers than just f*ck him yourself

55 minutes ago, Cyanide said:

I know, I'm literally talking to a dealer rn

But which drugs make you horny? I don't want to do meth or GHB

Girl..don't do meth You can be horny all on your own

Just do a 3some together occasionally??

Nope