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Do you get on with your dad?

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So, todays Father’s Day and most of the gay men I know in real life have a very strained relationship with their dad (me included). 
 

We’re cordial to one another, but whenever I’m around him the child version of me comes back out and I start making my voice deeper and making sure I stand a certain way etc. Hes never met any of my partners (even when I was married) and I doubt he ever will because at best he’s tolerant of me being gay without actually accepting it. He’s very macho and through childhood I had to put up with a revolving door of stepmothers. His current wife (who is a ***** and ruined my life but I won’t go there) is like four years older than me lol. 
 

so wbu atrl? 

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My dad is one of my best friends. He’s supportive of me and my life and only wants me to be happy and at peace. 
 

We had a really strained relationship when I was younger because he worked so much and had to be the disciplinarian because my mom couldn’t handle me, but when I turned 18 he told me I was an adult and he’d treat me as such. 
 

I’m very lucky to have him as a father and even luckier that our relationship is what it is because I know how rare that is for gay men. 

  • Author
1 minute ago, sugarysunflower said:

It is what it is. 

I feel your pain :kiss:

2 minutes ago, PMKARDASHIAN said:

My dad is one of my best friends. He’s supportive of me and my life and only wants me to be happy and at peace. 
 

We had a really strained relationship when I was younger because he worked so much and had to be the disciplinarian because my mom couldn’t handle me, but when I turned 18 he told me I was an adult and he’d treat me as such. 
 

I’m very lucky to have him as a father and even luckier that our relationship is what it is because I know how rare that is for gay men. 

 

1 minute ago, ConceptD said:

I feel your pain :kiss:

:heart:

Yes, we had some hardships until 5 years ago, more or less, related to my sexuality. But even with that, he never stopped being loving, caring and a reference of an educated person with the best values.

 

Right now, although we haven't hugged for years (since I live abroad), we have the best relationship ever :heart:

yep i get along with both him and my mom really well :heart: they’re very supportive of me which i understand is an extremely lucky thing to have as an lgbt person

My father has passed away but we did get along very well yes

I don't get along with neither of my parents. They've always been awful

Edited by Cloudy

Yes and no.

 

Although I love my dad and appreciate all he's done for me - it's so difficult for me to like him. He's the most emotionally unavailable person I've ever known. I remember literally telling him to say "well done" to me when I got my exam results, he was violent (rarely) a few times to my mother growing up, the most serious being when I was six, has never once told me he loves me that I recall (whenever I told him I loved him, I got told to shut up), and to this day he doesn't know I'm gay, because he sat me down once and told me - verbatim - "when you bring someone home to meet me, make sure it's Samantha, not Samuel." (It's my choice to keep that from him though; truthfully because I don't want him to know, not out of fear of how he'd react.)

 

I'm aware all of this makes him sound like an ogre - and he was when I was growing up. But he's done a lot of work on himself over the years and has become someone that I actually have time for now. We'll never be the quintessential father and son, because the damage has been done and we've nothing in common other than our personalities, and that's almost always toxic af. But we're civil to one another, and our relationship is predominately "hi/bye" based - and that's absolutely fine by me.

Edited by C_Colstead

Father's Day is on March 19 in my country. Interesting how it is not on the same day everywhere. 

Me and my dad were extremely close, he was supportive in anything that any members of our family did. He made sure we would have everything we need, sometimes wasn't able to provide those same things and would struggle with that fact, though he never let that get in the way of trying. 

He wasn't perfect at all times of course and knew to have his moments where he could be a bit overbearing. What is true that he got a lot of undeserved **** from everyone around him and deserved so much more than he was given in life. I think a lot of people who treated him badly know it and now feel very guilty. Often he had a lot to deal with but he was calm and collected and could defuse an argument or a tense situation like no one I have ever seen.

He was an extremely talented writer, photographer and incredibly creative. You could talk to him about any topic and he would know random obscure facts about it. The kind of person who is just a joy to talk to because you know the conversation will be interesting. I am glad I got to spend those last few weeks he was with us just driving around with him, talking, going out to take photos. 

Sometimes it feels like he was the person binding our family even closer, he was our rock. Now that he is gone it feels a bit empty and I struggle sometimes because the pressure to fill that role often shows up and I can't be that person. People expect you to do that but it is impossible. 

I know not everybody had the same luck with their fathers and I feel so sorry that not everybody gets to experience that. I so so lucky to have him as my dad and I really miss him. It has been two years since he passed and it is still so strange to even think about it.

Sometimes I do sometimes I don't ✿⊙﹏⊙ he has a bad habit to yap al the time

Yes and no.
Recently he had an injury and went to the hospital, so sometimes he calls me to bring something to him, we don’t fight and sometimes we discuss about football or whatever, we got an argument two weeks ago but it wasn’t that serious.
He coming back home on Thursday, I just know when he will comeback, the house will turn like a bloodbath. Some day we’re chill then the next day we’re fighting, i don’t know why we’re always arguing even if my mom she gets on my nerve sometimes and she always drag me for being messy, we still get along and are really close. 

We're cordial when we (rarely) see each other, but beyond that there isn't much of a relationship.

not since he turned to being a maga and qanon supporter

 

NG1pu5N.gif

Meh. It's not the worst relationship and it's not the best. We'll never see eye to eye on ANYTHING at all but I'm lucky to have him in my life. 

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