Been texting this guy for 2 months.
After that we went on two dates since then. Both dates were amazing for me, and I can tell from his face that it was the same way for him too.

But ever since that first date, the nature and duration of our texting changed. I reply the same way and timeframe but he texts back 2-3, or maybe 4 days later. In comparison to his everyday texts back then.
 

I keep overthinking about what I said or did that turned him off.
 

But when I think about it...after our dates, he'll send me super affectionate texts that say otherwise. (So I think to myself: "it's definitely not me then?")

 

And then suddenly another day, he's cold, uninvolved, unbothered and now takes awhile to reply. 
 

I really don't know if it's him or it's me...I hate this whole situation. I wanna move on but I also really like him.

 

this is a tipsy post, so I'm sorry if the whole thing is not making sense to your eyes 

 

tell me if I should move on or wait please?

Edited June 17, 20233 yr by kweenofxanax

Move on he’s not interested. Here’s the thing, in 2023 people know when they are messaged. The messages don’t get lost. Just find someone else who respects your time. 

He's not interested. He only wants to be affectionate when he feels like it. 

7 minutes ago, Tropez said:

Move on he’s not interested. Here’s the thing, in 2023 people know when they are messaged. The messages don’t get lost. Just find someone else who respects your time. 

How do I get over from those amazing two dates?
 

For some reason, it feels like such an unexpected reaction from him. We both had a great time, I'm suddenly just thinking that "is he just good at pretending/acting that he was having a nice time?". I genuinely felt we had an amazing connection.

 

I seriously wanna move on, but I also can't help but question everything. Because I want to improve and change how I go about things the next time I go on a date with somebody else. 

 

 

Edited June 17, 20233 yr by kweenofxanax

If someone took several days to text me I would move on 

2 minutes ago, Badgalbriel said:

He's not interested. He only wants to be affectionate when he feels like it. 

Ok reading the second opinion now and It hurts to hear the blunt and cold truth. But thanks for telling me.

 

My mind is saying the same thing but I couldn't help but ask for online opinions 

5 minutes ago, kweenofxanax said:

How do I get over from those amazing two dates?
 

For some reason, it feels like such an unexpected reaction from him. We both had a great time, I'm suddenly just thinking that "is he just good at pretending/acting that he was having a nice time?". I genuinely felt we had an amazing connection.

 

I seriously wanna move on, but I also can't help but question everything. Because I want to improve and change how I go about things the next time I go on a date with somebody else. 

 

 

It was only two dates. You were no exclusive. He clearly didn’t see it the way you did. So this whole thing is one sided. Respect yourself, pick up your dignity and move on. 

Obviously not 

he's not katy perry so he has no business playing hot & cold. if you enjoy the dates keep him around for that but if you're expecting something more it's time to drop him and move on

Just now, Tropez said:

It was only two dates. You were no exclusive. He clearly didn’t see it the way you did. So this whole thing is one sided. Respect yourself, pick up your dignity and move on. 

Fair enough. I just had such a good feeling about this one this time, so it really sucks.

 

Thank you. I'll navigate myself a lot better next time 

Try to not text him back either and see if he ever gets in touch with you again  If not, time to move on

3 minutes ago, Sept said:

Try to not text him back either and see if he ever gets in touch with you again  If not, time to move on

I sent the last text. It's been 3 days. I was pondering if I should send a catch up texting saying "hey, hope you're doing okay...etc,"

Don't waste your time on someone that doesn't give the same energy back

1 minute ago, sherloid_bai said:

Don't waste your time on someone that doesn't give the same energy back

This is something that's taking me a while to undertake as a mentality.

 

I keep coming up with excuses, like maybe they're just a typical busy adult who can't always reply. But I'm finally getting it.

Several days to reply seems like a sign he may not be interested

One lesson that's been hardest for me to accept as I get older, is that people who want to be in your life will make time for you. And this extends to friends, family, etc. Don't sweat it. It's not personal. This sort of thing will undoubtedly happen every now and then. You'll definitely tell the difference when you're with someone who wants to spend time with you. I promise. It's a night and day difference.

Edited June 17, 20233 yr by Miss Show Business

Maybe he’s just really busy idk? Try asking him what’s up before ditching him cold too

Hot take, he's not not interested in you, but he's nowhere near as invested as you are. He's probably talking to multiple people and you're just one of many that he has to take the time to reply to. It sounds as though he enjoys himself when he spends time with you but you're not his number 1 priority.

 

If I were you, I'd start talking to other people and put him out of my mind. If he hits you up asking to meet up again great, but don't get your hopes up.

1 minute ago, Illuminati said:

Several days to reply seems like a sign he may not be interested

He's replied several days after in such sweet way, so I gave him that, I guess.

 

a part of me was thinking that he was never interested after the date. But I guess I just needed the confirmation from here  it hurts but at least i was right! 

11 minutes ago, kweenofxanax said:

This is something that's taking me a while to undertake as a mentality.

 

I keep coming up with excuses, like maybe they're just a typical busy adult who can't always reply. But I'm finally getting it.

I'm a super busy adult and I reply ateast at the of the day 

51 minutes ago, kweenofxanax said:

Been texting this guy for 2 months.
After that we went on two dates since then. Both dates were amazing for me, and I can tell from his face that it was the same way for him too.

But ever since that first date, the nature and duration of our texting changed. I reply the same way and timeframe but he texts back 2-3, or maybe 4 days later. In comparison to his everyday texts back then.

Not interested. 

 

If you want to try, now's the time to go on the offense and tell him you are interested and wanna take things to the next level. But to be real, he's probably keeping you around as a 2nd option at best

43 minutes ago, Badgalbriel said:

He's not interested. He only wants to be affectionate when he feels like it. 

Sad but true 

Girl if it’s taking days for him to respond to casual texts then i think you should be questioning if this is a 2 way situation currently. If you have nothing to lose and the other option is drop him, I’d honestly just ask him if everything is good etc? No point in wasting your time and energy stressing about someone who might not even be thinking twice about you currently. But also gives him a chance to explain if that’s just how he always texts or if he’s going through a rough time etc. Life’s to short to waste your energy on people who don’t deserve it or value it. 

Whenever this happens, it always reminds me of this scene from Sex and the city. It captures it sooo well, I also especially love the end of this segment.

 

 

56 minutes ago, kweenofxanax said:

I reply the same way and timeframe but he texts back 2-3, or maybe 4 days later. In comparison to his everyday texts back then.

This part took me out. I'm sorry but it would've taken 4 days if he sent you an actual mail. We're in 2023 and everyone has phones — I would've overthinked if someone replied to me 10 hours late, and you're talking about 4 days