Got it fixed thank you atrl

Edited September 21Sep 21 by Soul Grabber

If it bothers you that much then you should ask him if he has a crush on her. And if he tells you he does then you should tell him he needs to get over her or else you're gonna have to break up with him. I don't think it's unreasonable to not want your boyfriend having a crush on his best friend

@Whis get your ass in here

Maybe I'm biased but a man moving in with a girl friend is either gay adjacent or trying to sleep with them. At least from the guys I've known who've had female roommates. So I would have also found it weird if he had moved in with her and I don't think I'm a very jealous person.

I don't know about asking straight up if he has a crush, but I do think you should express all of what you feel about their relationship to him. How he reacts and moves forward will tell you everything.

Jealousy always comes from a place of feeling insecure, which is a valid feeling. The situations you're concerned about sound very valid too, so my gut tells me not to trust this guy. My advice is clear communication. Sit down with him, talk about everything that's on your mind, and see how you feel afterwards. That's the basis of a healthy relationship. See how the conversation makes you feel and whether you still want to move forward with him.

Another advice from my own experience: I used to be very jealous too, especially when I wasn't in the best place mentally or physically. I was constantly afraid of losing the person I was with because my self-worth was basically nonexistent. I thought every conversation they had with someone else could somehow lead to them leaving me. After years of therapy, I healed that part of myself mostly, and now I realize that I feel secure and barely experience jealousy anymore. That's partly because I know my worth now, but also because I choose people who genuinely make me feel appreciated. That feeling, together with the trust you build over time, takes away so much of the fear and insecurity that can turn into jealousy.

I think you need to just talk to him more when you're feeling calm and collected but you must, I repeat you MUST, relate it to your own feelings. "It makes me feel..." "I feel like..." because if you make accusations he'll feel compelled to dispel them and thus an argument will begin

Thank you for all the advice Luckily I feel like I can talk to him about it, so I think I'll do that, but it's hard knowing how to go about it. I think I'll ask him if there's any feelings so we can figure out what to do, and if he says no, I'll just let him know that IF there's feelings he better be thinking about moving on from that, instead of me finding out later and we have to split.

1 hour ago, bad guy said:

So I would have also found it weird if he had moved in with her and I don't think I'm a very jealous person

Ngl it's also just the embarrassment of having to tell my friends and family that my boyfriend would be moving in with a girl two hours away, because I know what I would think if someone else told me that

At least he seemed to have moved on from that and suggests that we should move in together at some point instead.

avoid it .. well try too

I don't get jealous with real people tho more like dating rumors of my celebrity crushes my first one was when I was 11 when my crush had a girl in MV. so I avoided listening to the song. But honestly when it comes to real jealously I don't let it get to me.

This is weird. Why is a straight guy wanting to move in with a female friend so much? If shes attractive/decent looking then you should definitely be concerned.

I thought you were both gay man and I was like ppfff.

If he is a straight guy then HELL NO. Talk to him and make it very clear that you find the situation weird and uncomfortable. Don't get into details just be very clear about how you feel and watch him. If he adjusts, great; if he doesn't DUMP his ass.

30 minutes ago, Red Velvet said:

This is weird. Why is a straight guy wanting to move in with a female friend so much? If shes attractive/decent looking then you should definitely be concerned.

I'd like to add it's not as uncommon here for men and women that are friends to move in together compared to other places, but still. I wouldn't feel comfortable with it, especially combined with what comes out of his mouth regarding her sometimes.

I'm not that scared that he'll cheat because he always brings me along if he's hanging out with her. I have more of a feeling that he might crushed on her for many years, but made peace that they're not going to be together but also don't want let her go because she's a friend. Feelings happens, but in my head, you can't have both