discussion The Depression Lounge

[monologueNacafe]

Car got wrecked today in an accident. I feel like there’s always SOMETHING. I can’t afford a car note right now. Life really sucks

[naval23]

Happy World Mental Health Day #YouAreNotAlone

 

Such a powerful video

 

 

 

[KFC]

I am SO ******* STUPID. Firstly how could I ever think that I would have a chance with HIM and secondly how could I let it consume my life to the point where I'm now going to spiral into depression when I've been doing so well  I'm so done I don't want to be here any more

[KFC]

Omg not me being suicidal earlier and feeling better after a 4 hour nap  don't know if it's a good idea for me to drink today because of this manic up and down

[Devin]

On 10/5/2023 at 8:27 PM, monologueNacafe said:

Car got wrecked today in an accident. I feel like there’s always SOMETHING. I can’t afford a car note right now. Life really sucks

omg are you good?

[Devin]

1 hour ago, HotFriedChicken said:

Omg not me being suicidal earlier and feeling better after a 4 hour nap  don't know if it's a good idea for me to drink today because of this manic up and down

I suggest pass on the drinking. It clouds ur judgment and heighten those feelings. I been down that road. 
 

I was hoping things were getting better w/ you.

[monologueNacafe]

1 hour ago, Devin said:

omg are you good?

Yes I’m fine. Thanks 🙏🏾 

[monologueNacafe]

I'm super stressed and overwhelmed and just want to scream

[Likingstars]

Winter is approaching and I just restarted on Wellbutrin. Im scared of seasonal depression 

[monologueNacafe]

[KFC]

2 hours ago, monologueNacafe said:

[Inner Insanity]

Just got my heart broken by a guy I've been in love with for 2 years. Someone I've given so much of myself financially, emotionally, and spiritually. Feels like it's all been for nothing and hurts so bad knowing he wants anyone else but me. Just really struggling to cope.

[monologueNacafe]

I do not want to live anymore.

[monologueNacafe]

But I also don't want to die

[monologueNacafe]

I was hopeful at first but I'm 50% through TMS and there's been no change. The doctor said I should start seeing changes now. I don't have any hope for life at this point.

Edited October 23, 2023 by monologueNacafe

[Joyride]

had an appointment with my psychiatrist last friday. I've started to show more "typical" signs of depression and it just seems to get worse with time, no meds have worked for me and I'm almost 13 years into meds.

 

sometimes I remember the person who I used to be, especially when the symptoms weren't as noticeable as now and I always feel like crying because I really thought it was going bad then. I never would've guessed I'd be here today with my worst episode. both my personality and my physical appeareance have changed so drastically, I'm lifeless

[monologueNacafe]

2 hours ago, Joyride said:

had an appointment with my psychiatrist last friday. I've started to show more "typical" signs of depression and it just seems to get worse with time, no meds have worked for me and I'm almost 13 years into meds.

 

sometimes I remember the person who I used to be, especially when the symptoms weren't as noticeable as now and I always feel like crying because I really thought it was going bacj then. I never would've thought I'd be here today with my worst episode. both my personality and my physical appeareance have changed so drastically, I'm lifeless

I'm 13 years into meds too and nothing has worked. It's super frustrating so I get it.

 

[EnigmaticAndroid]

Need to be honest. I've quickly been making a habit out of a hard drug. I think I may be starting to become addicted. I used to roll my eyes when people say that [xyz] will take everything away from you, but I'm realizing that could be the case. Thank God I'm not in way too deep, but sometimes I feel like I don't have it in me to get myself together. I dont know what my future really is. I've started to become scared and ashamed of myself. 

 

Just needed to get that off of my chest. I'm gonna be starting therapy in a few weeks. 

[AvadaKedavra]

Lemme vent today:

My dad can be really difficult at times, and even though I love him, I'm also afraid of him. We've tried to help him change, but he's resistant, and we've come to accept that he's not a good person. Unfortunately, life hasn't given me the independence I need, and it's a tough situation.
 

I appreciate the beauty in life and the world, but it's also a harsh and sometimes horrible place. I find myself questioning why the world is like this, and it's frustrating that we don't have any answers. The God-AI-Aliens who created us...Why? WTH
 

My brother is going through problems with his girlfriend, and it's adding to my stress.
 

I have a math exam coming up, and I struggle with math, which makes me regret choosing a tech field sometimes. Unfortunately, my family didn't support my education in this area.

I'm deeply concerned about the future of my country with the new president in charge.

 

[Aethereal]

Life is so hard and it never gets better.  I wish I was a middle class privileged guy with no issues other than my studies. I wish I could go back years ago when I did not have to go through all of this and never comeback.

Edited November 2, 2023 by Aristotle

[monologueNacafe]

TMS isn’t working for me. I’m 25 sessions in (out of 36) and there’s been no change. If anything I’m worse. The only other option is lithium which I don’t really want to take. I’m wasting my life and I’ve given up 

[popmusicisdead]

2023 has been such a flop year for me. i keep dreading what will happen next. anxiety and depression has already taken so many opportunities from me. i can't keep letting them win but they always do.

[Antikythera]

My diagnosis is type 2 bipolar, same as Mariah. I take medication for years now and it really changed my life.

 

I take lithium, some people are really prejudiced about it, but for me its good. I dont feel it makes me numb or slow.

 

Medication is not the ultimate answer. It helps u find some stability,  but contrary to many people's believes, it wont make you "happy". You still have to live life with the difficulties of everyday living. It just gives you a mental health space.

 

Before maybe I was too much all over the place. Never went "crazy", bipolar type 2 is the type where there are NO psychotic breaks, instead we feel a constant depression with small periods of having pent up energy, but the energy can also manifests as being irritated by the smallest things.

 

[Trigger alert, next portion about suicide ideation.]

 

Spoiler

At my worst I thought of outing my self from this world constantly. I would go to sleep praying I dont wake up and wake up sad I was waking up. Even my dreams would be depressed. Not even porn would take my mind of death. I would daydream about jump out of the window.

Meditation also helps, I practice zen meditation because it is a type of meditation where u are not encourage to "see things" or "to feel this or that", u have a method and u do it. It is a half open eyes kind of meditation, u are not totally in you inner world and not totally outside. I really love the concept because it works. Now, I am not a full on zen Buddhist, but I like reading some conxepts, it really does help me. Meditation trains my mind to not engage with everything it comes to my mind. So, now when I feel really depressed I know how to not be my feelings, I can take a step back and question it. Sure, I still human, so sometimes I will be sad and negative, but less frequently.

 

I think the important stuff is to know life wont ever be perfect, so dont expect it to be. At the same time, life wont ever be only drama and depression, and u can get help!

[ThousandMiles]

Has anyone tried deleting all socials cold turkey and has that benefited their mental health? I’m obsessed with tiktok and instagram, i don’t think i can delete instagram because it connects me with too many people irl. 

[flower moon]

3 hours ago, ThousandMiles said:

Has anyone tried deleting all socials cold turkey and has that benefited their mental health? I’m obsessed with tiktok and instagram, i don’t think i can delete instagram because it connects me with too many people irl. 

literally deleted both a couple of months ago. getting rid of tiktok was definitely good for me, although it was really hard to not just reactivate my account lol but i dont miss it at all now.

i struggled to delete insta for the same reason as you, but ultimately decided it was mostly a performative space and if anyone wanted to contact me/ see pics i took they could just  use whatsapp/ normal message app or something.

my mind is deffo calmer these days without them and its crazy how much more time i seem to have lmao.
glad i know less about other people too. why did i need all that.