discussion Should trans people disclose their transness to their partners?

[John Slayne]

31 minutes ago, swissman said:

if someone wants to 100% not ever date a trans person, maybe they can make this important "choice" known, rather than putting the responsibility (and potential danger, as you've outlined) in the hands of the trans individual.

Exactly this  if you have a list of preferences and deal-breakers, then it's your own responsibility to filter your potential dates accordingly, not the other way around

[Gladiator]

I do think disclosing this piece of information about yourself early on is rather important.

But I am inclined to assume that the people who do not disclose this early on in a relationship / before a relationship are in the overwhelming minority of the population of trans people.

[ConceptD]

Yes they should. Not only because it can be dangerous and life threatening if they don’t and their partner finds out, but also because there are issues of consent here and not everyone is comfortable being in a relationship with someone that used to be a different sex. You can’t force someone to be attracted to something that they’re not and there’s nothing wrong that. 

[fountain]

Such a contentious topic honestly, I don’t really know if there is a simple answer. I think it’s probably best to be taken from a case by case situation rather than a generalisation, as every trans person is unique and has different circumstances. It’s easy to assume that the safe option may be to tell the person that they are trans, but that can also put them at risk of being outed and what not. It really is a personal thing ultimately because transness doesn’t just exist as one thing or one experience. Each individual would have their own reasons that they should or shouldn’t, and that should be taken into account rather than equating all trans people as one. And of course, as many people have pointed out, the simplest way to cut out this issue entirely is to end transphobia itself. Easier said than done, but if people just didn’t hate trans people so much for no reason then we wouldn’t even need to ask these questions.