Auburn Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 AUBURN'S REVIEWS Spoiler Hug - Summer, Autumn, Winter, Spring I love it. It’s amazing, I don’t really have much else to say. I live for songs like this! minho - the warrior & the traitor Love the juxtaposition in this. Also have no qualms with this one. Great job! TROPICUM - Deity This is a good example that songs don’t HAVE to fully rhyme to be great. I can feel the tension of the battlefield. I love seeing that you incorporated the critiques you received last week. Astronomy - BLAMELESS / UNDONE I just love how this is a two parter. Even though it was longer than the other entries, I felt just as enthralled reading it throughout. The meter in Blameless was great, in Undone it was mostly good, though there were a few lines that seemed just a bit wordy. hurricane326 - All That Is Known This is simply gorgeous! Wow wow wow, I don’t know what else to say. You are on fire! disruptive - fable of the deep sea star The three-line stanzas in this were a unique choice, but I think it worked, and helped you stand out. A few lines seem a bit long here and there, but that’s it. I love the story. Gastrodonatella - My Little Blossom Firstly, I would like to say thank you because I feel like you were always my biggest cheerleader when I played this game in the past! The storytelling in this is just beautiful and heartbreaking. There are few spots where I was expected a rhyme where there wasn’t one, but overall this is very strong. I love the switch of perspective. firecrotch - meet again I can definitely tell you your meter has already improved compared to last round. Loving the honesty and the concept here, the only nitpick from me is that it doesn’t feel super related to the Pokemon you chose. Aurora - Castleglass Despite your stated lack of inspiration this week, I love this a lot! The metaphor really works and is something I think everyone can relate to at times. Beautifully written. OreGuy - the afterglow Very strong chorus for me. I think the styling of the verses is very different (in a good way) from a typical song so I’m glad it worked out this way. Straight up just gonna say I think saying “ ‘tleast” in the last line of the chorus was strange, I’m not really sure how to pronounce that but I just said it like “at least” in my head lol! Funnellegs - The Seafarer Oh wow, oh wow! The meter in this song is SO GOOD, it just flows so amazingly. I love love love the chorus as well, only thing is I wish the variation of the chorus you used in the final part of the song was also used in the second chorus refrain. The song is a bit short so I think you could have afforded that. 8thPrince - I’m Happy You’re Going to Hell I really like this! There are a few overworded lines here and there but overall this is really strong and I love the cheekiness of it. Gay Rat Divorce - Crying Contest I think this is a nice concept, but unfortunately this round is very competitive for me. There’s nothing really wrong with this, it just feels like it lacks the oomph some of the other entries provided. Rence - wallflower I really love the meaning and thought put into this song. I would say this is one of the best Pokemon-song connections this round, if not the best. It just works while still being creative. Dessy - Amaterasu The rhyme scheme in your verse and bridge is top notch, first of all. Unfortunately, I just wish it was longer. It feels a bit underdeveloped and rushed through the story. But what you have is endearing. Ampersand13 - Running Water’s Lullaby I don’t think this is as bad as you made it out to be in the description lol! That being said I don’t think it is as strong as some of the other entries this round. The chorus starts out promising but it kinda feels like it changes pace halfway through and becomes a bit more clunky. You have a very strong bridge though, in my opinion. dweebz - Klefki (Secrets) This didn’t connect much with me, sorry. I think your lines are bit too short for me. It reads a bit disjointed because of that. With that being said, I really liked the addition of the backing vocal lyrics, it added another dimension to the song. Speezy - Give Me a Dose I can feel the connection to the Pokemon you chose well in your entry. I think what you’ve written has a nice pop sensibility to it, however, I wish it was a bit longer/fleshed out. Overprotected - Thorns I really like how you changed the chorus and it still felt like it would be sang exactly the same way. Great job. It’s lacking a bit of a switch up without a bridge or something, but overall I like it. keshaspearsxo - S, C! I just love this chorus whew! It’s really great. Great connection with the Pokemon, I can imagine hearing this song while reading it. Only nitpick, I think the choir line at the end of the second prechorus is too long. (Sidenote: would you prefer me to never include portions of your songs in my reviews, or is that just a request for this round? Just so I know for the future.) Lucky#17 I think this is a bit all over the place tbh. The verses with the back and forth between the parentheses, it just didn’t work for me. The “clink” lyric was a nice touch though, I really liked that part. ceremonials - Siren I like the breezy feel of this song. It’s lightly written, something just feels very refreshing about it. I think it lacks something to really push it to the top of my list, but it’s still very good. I definitely think this round was better than the first round. So many strong entries. Great job everyone! Sorry about the late reviews. Spoiler @hurricane326 @Ampersand13 @Hug @8thPrince @firecrotch @OreGuy @TROPICUM @funnellegs @Aurora @Rence @dweebz @Overprotected @Dessy @Lucky#17 @Gay Rat Divorce @minho @disruptive @Astronomy @Speezy @Gastrodonatella @ceremonials @keshaspearsxo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rence Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 Yes Janet stan yes excellence Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rence Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 Thank you @Auburn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ughgabriel Posted September 16, 2020 Author Share Posted September 16, 2020 RESULTS TONIGHT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ATRL Username Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 Thank Auburn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rence Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 4 minutes ago, ughgabriel said: RESULTS TONIGHT we- how Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
firecrotch Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 Thank you @auburn!! <3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Overprotected Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 :shy: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Overprotected Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 4 minutes ago, ughgabriel said: RESULTS TONIGHT I know us batch 2 girls don't deserve **** for not sending early but are we getting more critiques? :shy: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
firecrotch Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 5 minutes ago, ughgabriel said: RESULTS TONIGHT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ughgabriel Posted September 16, 2020 Author Share Posted September 16, 2020 1 minute ago, Overprotected said: I know us batch 2 girls don't deserve **** for not sending early but are we getting more critiques? :shy: Mess, of course you'll be getting your reviews<3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8thPrince Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 @Auburn Thank you for the review Auburn! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dessy Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 Batch 2 girls unite! And thanks for rihview auburn! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dweebz Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 WHEW! I FLOPPPPPPPPPPPED! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
firecrotch Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 the way ive put more effort into this game than i have some of this semesters classes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fountain Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 38 minutes ago, Auburn said: keshaspearsxo - S, C! I just love this chorus whew! It’s really great. Great connection with the Pokemon, I can imagine hearing this song while reading it. Only nitpick, I think the choir line at the end of the second prechorus is too long. (Sidenote: would you prefer me to never include portions of your songs in my reviews, or is that just a request for this round? Just so I know for the future.) Yeah I’d prefer it for all rounds if that’s okay. I just hate the idea of people reading random sections without any context of the song as a whole, in some cases with the way I can write I don’t think it makes any sense without seeing full thing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fountain Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 7 minutes ago, firecrotch said: the way ive put more effort into this game than i have some of this semesters classes I can relate I put more effort into hosting and then dropped out of university Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dweebz Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 My song being too intellectual for some of y'all. It really is a CharlieXCX inspired song. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Auburn Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 59 minutes ago, Gastrodonatella said: !!!!! this was very sweet of you, i always felt like you and overprotected were underrated and i always ended up perched to read entries from you two also i'm glad you liked the song thank you very much, reading all the entries so far really has me missing playing as a contestant 22 minutes ago, keshaspearsxo said: Yeah I’d prefer it for all rounds if that’s okay. I just hate the idea of people reading random sections without any context of the song as a whole, in some cases with the way I can write I don’t think it makes any sense without seeing full thing okay, I will remember not to do it from here on out Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fountain Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 7 minutes ago, Auburn said: okay, I will remember not to do it from here on out Thank you for asking! And thanks for the review too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8thPrince Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 1 hour ago, ughgabriel said: RESULTS TONIGHT excited Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
minho Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 excited PMW!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ATRL Moderator Ampersand13 Posted September 16, 2020 ATRL Moderator Share Posted September 16, 2020 Thank you @Auburn! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rence Posted September 16, 2020 Share Posted September 16, 2020 i might be asleep during results again PME!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ughgabriel Posted September 17, 2020 Author Share Posted September 17, 2020 Unacceptable, set an alarm x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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