UFO Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 3 minutes ago, Temporal said: Art is about conveying emotions and making other people feel what you're feeling. In order to do that, you have to put it in terms that other people can understand. THAT'S the difficult thing about art, making something that can convey complex emotions in a universally digestible way. I did not have the same emotional reaction that you did. Sorry. That's the fact of the matter, and I'm not required to feel the same way you or anyone else did. I didn't ask that it be relatable to me. I didn't expect that the song be written for me. I never graded it on the quality. My complaint was that I wanted more than just a play by play of what happened that one day. I wanted a next level, beyond the events of that day. Why that event for a self-portrait, how that portrays Hug as a person and his life as a whole. I couldn't get that from one day of events. I learned about Hug's life, but not about Hug as a person, which was the expectation that I had - and have held - for this challenge for two years. What I also thought was that Hug's writing felt reserved: because he experienced it first hand, he has a more emotional response to that song and its words because every single lyric can speak to him. When writing and making art for an audience - which is what you all in this competition are doing - you have to be able to create something that can make anyone regardless of their situation feel. I think that the song didn't have that quality because of what I said above. That's your opinion that it was relatable to you. Great. That was not how I felt. I had to rush these reviews because I'm busy this week, so I'm sorry this is how I had to flush out the rest of my thoughts on the song. I apologize if anyone didn't understand why I felt the way I did from that paragraph review. I will not however, apologize for how I received the song, and you all will deal with it. Wait yaaaas @ these italics and bolded fonts aklfjaskl serve aesthetic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bandito Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Just now, Hug said: @Glassmouth Your song topic is actually interesting as far as PH goes. I think you didn't make it TOO blunt what it was about (where it basically becomes a preachy song about "looking up from your phone once in a while!"). I liked it. @Lane Boy This is SO different from what you showed me (in a good way!) It was a lot easier to read and actually get what was going on. I enjoyed it a lot more this time around. I agree, Glassmouth did ThaT! But in regards to my song, thanks so much for saying that! Yeah, I definitely did a complete re-work from what I originally had. I just had to figure out general themes and then actually go through the process of creating rhymes and some kind of meter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Glassmouth Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 2 minutes ago, Hug said: @Glassmouth Your song topic is actually interesting as far as PH goes. I think you didn't make it TOO blunt what it was about (where it basically becomes a preachy song about "looking up from your phone once in a while!"). I liked it. thank you, I went for the artsy fartsy road and I think it paid off this time, because I feel it's a lot different from my previous songs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hug Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Also, I didn't encourage Will to say anything that was his own doing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fountain Posted June 24, 2017 Author Share Posted June 24, 2017 2 minutes ago, UFO said: Right? I mean im just kinda looking forward to PH11 now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Glassmouth Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Just now, Lane Boy said: I agree, Glassmouth did ThaT! Not you king of the TOP 3 praising my song Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bandito Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Just now, Glassmouth said: Not you king of the TOP 3 praising my song I've been praising your song since you showed it to me. Wym sis? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Glassmouth Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Just now, Lane Boy said: I've been praising your song since you showed it to me. Wym sis? but like praising it more Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Temporal Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Is it too late to add this iconic gif to the end of that essay? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fountain Posted June 24, 2017 Author Share Posted June 24, 2017 Anyway results will be tomorrow. Aurora is too busy this round but I'm still waiting to see about Gabe. So, sorry if it's only me and Temp this week but life happens Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hug Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 @UFO Love the word play on 'magic tricks' Your whole song is aesthetic, really! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bandito Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 But anyway, I've been really pushing out songs lately. I just did two sings that I think are cute. One was The Ex Games and the other was called Death At A Birthday. I can't wait to work on them more because I truly do love them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Temporal Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 2 minutes ago, Hug said: Also, I didn't encourage Will to say anything that was his own doing. klhjwfahh I'm sure Really, your song was good, and I get that I waded into murky territory for not lauding a song about a starving child and his mother, but if no one else will say it, no****soral will! I hope you get what I was going for more now that I've explained it in a little more detail with a more or less sassy tone though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bandito Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 3 minutes ago, keshaspearsxo said: Anyway results will be tomorrow. Aurora is too busy this round but I'm still waiting to see about Gabe. So, sorry if it's only me and Temp this week but life happens @ughgabriel, you better work (for a moderate amount of time because I don't support harsh labor laws) bish! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fountain Posted June 24, 2017 Author Share Posted June 24, 2017 Just now, Lane Boy said: @ughgabriel, you better work bish! I know he's busy too so no pressure Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bandito Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 5 minutes ago, Glassmouth said: but like praising it more I have always loved the song, even from the first draft! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hug Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Also, let me post my #controversial challenge that tbh wasn't a self portrait, but Temporal's allowed his opinions regardless. I particularly found the "I learned about his life, but not him as a person" part to be telling. I can tell where he's coming from now, although I wish that part was in the original review. "I Do, I Do..." (no cover because I couldn't find one that captured the feeling I wanted) Spoiler [verse 1] I remember a night I heard you cry yourself to sleep I knew you felt guilty Cause there wasn’t much to eat And you wrapped yourself up In a tiny, tattered sheet You gave me your blanket So that I could have some heat [refrain] I wanted to tell you it’s alright I wanted to go and console you I wanted to beg you not to cry But I didn’t want you to know that I knew [verse 2] And we lied on the floor Of the apartment that night There weren’t any beds We could hardly pay for lights You woke up that morning Like everything was alright You got me up for school Got me dressed and waved goodbye [refrain] I went to school that morning and lied I didn’t want to tell them the truth People asked how I was, I’d say fine But I didn’t want them to know what I knew [verse 3] All I could think about Were those muffled crying sounds How you tried to hide it But you couldn’t keep it down All I saw in my head Was you covering your mouth Through cracks in your fingers Your whimpers were breaking out [refrain] I came home that day, and I smiled You looked at me, and you smiled, too You asked about my day, and I lied Because I hoped you didn’t know that I knew [outro] As you hid your sadness I thought I would hide mine too You wanted to spare me And I wanted to spare you But time made me honest And it’s time you knew the truth You might not remember that night But I do, I do... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Glassmouth Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 1 minute ago, Lane Boy said: I have always loved the song, even from the first draft! you always stan, you should be the judge next season Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UFO Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Just now, keshaspearsxo said: I mean im just kinda looking forward to PH11 now Nnnnnnn these gheys are gonna be shook once PH11 hits and the competitiveness comes back y'all let me have my #1 sex anthem this season. ok fine. "it's PH 10.5 so it doesn't count" ok fine but next season, I won't let y'all BREATHE Experimental Void Renaissance Metamorphosis Paranoia Lucidity Catharsis ??? *takes out thesaurus to find another cool-sounding word to be my theme next season* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bandito Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Just now, Glassmouth said: you always stan, you should be the judge next season I actively stan all while giving beneficial critiques! Now that's what I call being a great friend! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Glassmouth Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 And you wrapped yourself up In a tiny, tattered sheet You gave me your blanket So that I could have some heat @Hug what type of Sufjan's Fourth of July experience is this Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Glassmouth Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Just now, Lane Boy said: I actively stan all while giving beneficial critiques! Now that's what I call being a great friend! () and also a great judge Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hug Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Just now, Glassmouth said: And you wrapped yourself up In a tiny, tattered sheet You gave me your blanket So that I could have some heat @Hug what type of Sufjan's Fourth of July experience is this Fun fact: My birthday is on the 4th of July. song is about me confirmed? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Glassmouth Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 1 minute ago, Hug said: Fun fact: My birthday is on the 4th of July. song is about me confirmed? truly a warholian expedition Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fountain Posted June 24, 2017 Author Share Posted June 24, 2017 1 minute ago, UFO said: Nnnnnnn these gheys are gonna be shook once PH11 hits and the competitiveness comes back y'all let me have my #1 sex anthem this season. ok fine. "it's PH 10.5 so it doesn't count" ok fine but next season, I won't let y'all BREATHE Experimental Void Renaissance Metamorphosis Paranoia Lucidity Catharsis ??? *takes out thesaurus to find another cool-sounding word to be my theme next season* Not when I'm going back to competing next season too. Me and you, the original petty bitches, at once. PH11 ain't ready, especially for my inevitable underwhelming attempt at a comeback Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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