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Taylor Swift - 'THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT'


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Posted

I'm literally just now realizing how point-blank ridiculous/unreasonable it is that her standard is so high right now that a first week that ties the highest debut that any other artist has done since ******* Reputation would be lowkey considered a mega-bomb for TTPD

 

like what the actual ****, her status is insane, ugh legend

 

:ryan3:

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Posted (edited)

Let me open a thread titled "Swiftie Only: TTPD Opening Predictions?” so that we can mass spam/vote the 750K and below options. We gotta start spreading those lowered expectations ASAP 

 

 

:ryan3:

Edited by PoisonedIvy
  • Haha 7
Posted

Flop tweet. The Cock and Ball Torture Department is going to flop so hard oh wow.

  • Haha 1
Posted
4 minutes ago, Vespertine said:

The Cock and Ball Torture Department is going to flop so hard

As one of my favorite Klossers here, I'm sure you're one of the few with the wits to understand just how painfully over-the-top "But Daddy I Love Him" and "I Can Fix Him (No Really, I Can)” are with their heteronormative themes :gaycat3: And how those motifs will sail right over the Hetlors heads :gaycat5:

  • Like 3
Posted
2 minutes ago, Vespertine said:

Flop tweet. The Cock and Ball Torture Department is going to flop so hard oh wow.

She's lost: 

 

-Gaylors

-Haylors

-Soccer Moms due to concert ticket prices/The VS Chair

-Country Fans (Beyonce stole)

-MAGA

-Zionist because she went to Ramy's Stand-Up

-New Yorkers because she is never there anymore

-rep fans because she hasn't released the TV

 

 

 

It's over.

  • Haha 10
Posted
10 minutes ago, PoisonedIvy said:

As one of my favorite Kl*****rs here, I'm sure you're one of the few with the wits to understand just how painfully over-the-top "But Daddy I Love Him" and "I Can Fix Him (No Really, I Can)” are with their heteronormative themes :gaycat3: And how those motifs will sail right over the Hetlors heads :gaycat5:

The fact that "But Daddy I Love Him" is from the Little Mermaid, the gayest movie of all time, ugh Her sapphic mind. Cannot wait to unpack these (critically panned streaming poison) songs. 

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Posted

We'll never truly lose the Gaylors - we'll stand in solidarity with them in line at every local Target on release day to buy every variant they have of The Tortured Lesbians Subaru Dealership :heart2:

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Posted
10 minutes ago, Tusk said:

She's lost: 

 

-Gaylors

-New Yorkers because she is never there anymore

-rep fans because she hasn't released the TV

 

 

 

It's over.

When you're all three, oh it's so rough out here. 

 

UqQMYDU.gif

  • Haha 2
Posted

when the release day is over and Spotify hasn't tweeted anything

 

UqQMYDU.gif

  • Haha 7
Posted

The hype is truly me now WHEWWWW :WAP:

Posted
5 minutes ago, enchanted0 said:

when the release day is over and Spotify hasn't tweeted anything

 

UqQMYDU.gif

I will log off, uninstall all of my social media app, take a sleeping pill and directly go to bed (then sobbing for two hours)

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Posted

I'm praying whoever said this the album was similar to Ceremonials was right. Could yall imagine if we had a song with production like this

 

  • Like 3
Posted
3 hours ago, wastedpotential said:

@Klein, just know that I'm praying you get Renegade and Carolina as surprise songs on the Eras tour now that she's acknowledged their existence (I'd also manifest Birch for you too but I think that's way too much of an ask of her nnn)

I made a list of 20 songs that I truly truly want as surprise songs, and if I get even one of them I can deal with all the others being flops. Best believe Renegade and Carolina are on it. And yes, Birch too because I'm delusional:jonny:

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Posted

Yeah her tweet flopped

Something is definitely not right

Posted
  • BrandNewBrandon
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:bibliahh::bibliahh::bibliahh:


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Posted
6 minutes ago, FolkLover1989 said:

Yeah her tweet flopped

Something is definitely not right

500k debut coming

Spoiler

500k in first 30 minutes

 

Posted
5 minutes ago, Roger21 said:
  • BrandNewBrandon
  • Banned

:bibliahh::bibliahh::bibliahh:


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3ee19ad906e1c1ddd9702f2f0cdd1635.thumb.g

Posted

Man people are really going to town with these Playlist placements :toofunny3: 

 

 

Posted
17 minutes ago, FolkLover1989 said:

Yeah her tweet flopped

Something is definitely not right

Now watch Taylor get 5 TTPD tracks more than 15 million first day streams on Global Spotify with fortnight leading with more than 20 million streams on first day.

Posted
4 minutes ago, ALA said:

Man people are really going to town with these Playlist placements :toofunny3: 

 

 

It's laughable at the thesis statements that are on Twitter. 
 

 

Posted

Playlists? It's giving ME! release week playlists flashbacks

 

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@Magickarp I'm scared! The parallels are too much.

  • Haha 2
Posted
28 minutes ago, Roger21 said:
  • BrandNewBrandon
  • Banned

:bibliahh::bibliahh::bibliahh:


    •  
  •  

3ee19ad906e1c1ddd9702f2f0cdd1635.thumb.g

Posted

So now we all freaking out about tweet likes? 
That's a first!

 

We can't win. We're ruining ourself…

Posted

the absolute meltdowns are always so fun to watch when she's obviously about to release her opus 

 

but let me join 

 

the american fans said NO to her editions

 

Kayleigh from minnesota is TIRED of her daughter McNavy asking for more Tay merch when she sold her 2019 Nissan to go to the Eras tour

 

Taylor coming out as a MALE lover heteronormative trad gf making her lose the LESBIANS

 

NFL fans boycott her album after their unhinged behavior during the superbowl 

 

country fans drop her for cowboy carter…

 

tree admires her reflection in that black mirror as she turns off her ipad, only 200k retweets in 5 hours a day before the release, when she used to pull triple of those numbers. she grabs a glass of wine and calls zane lowe….

 

the album drops, they wait for a song to stand out to make it the lead single 

 

ALL songs stall and drop the next week. some cry, some unstan, some drop their TS sticker-covered macbook

to the ground. The 30s and 40s reviews start coming in shortly

 

its over 

 

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  • Haha 2
Posted
Just now, TROPICUM said:

the absolute meltdowns are always so fun to watch when she's obviously about to release her opus 

 

but let me join 

 

the american fans said NO to her editions

 

Kayleigh from minnesota is TIRED of her daughter McNavy asking for more Tay merch when she sold her 2019 Nissan to go to the Eras tour

 

Taylor coming out as a MALE lover heteronormative trad gf making her lose the LESBIANS

 

NFL fans boycott her album after their unhinged behavior during the superbowl 

 

country fans drop her for cowboy carter…

 

tree admires her reflection in that black mirror as she turns off her ipad, only 200k retweets in 5 hours a day before the release, when she used to pull triple of those numbers. she grabs a glass of wine and calls zane lowe….

 

the album drops, they wait for a song to stand out to make it the lead single 

 

ALL songs stall and drop the next week. some cry, some unstan, some drop their TS sticker-covered macbook

to the ground. The 30s and 40s reviews start coming in shortly

 

its over 

 

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people who are saying that TTPD album will have critical and commercial failure are delusional

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