Sanguine Posted October 26, 2023 Author Posted October 26, 2023 On 10/24/2023 at 9:49 PM, Sanguine said: Choose The Album, Then a Song Round 3: Light/Dark ENTRIES AND EXPLANATIONS HERE CONTESTANT VOTING LINK HERE Sadly PoisonedIvy had to quit due to personal issues, we wish them well! So now we are down to the final fifteen. Just like last round, please read every entry then proceed with our normal guidelines. We have nine lights and six darks! This won't affect judging, just a fun fact. If you do not complete this by the deadline, 30% of your score will be deducted. The bottom two players CUMULATIVELY will be eliminated. Remember placements are very much volatile at this point in the game and could still drastically change with a single strong/weak entry! ~48 hour deadline! DUE: Thurs, Oct 26 @ 10 pm EST @Psycho @ATRL Username @luckystrike @MusicLoverDude @Dessy @minho @Not Like The Movies @stupidjock @EriKills @Post Malone @ultraviolence.xx @Auburn @wehavetostan @PinkBox @nostalgic Hey reminder that contestant voting is due in eight hours. Shelven may need an extension for his rates though so I'll keep everyone updated, but get it in by the original deadline if you can! @Psycho @ATRL Username @luckystrike @MusicLoverDude @Not Like The Movies @EriKills @Post Malone @Auburn
MusicLoverDude Posted October 26, 2023 Posted October 26, 2023 3 hours ago, Sanguine said: Hey reminder that contestant voting is due in eight hours. Shelven may need an extension for his rates though so I'll keep everyone updated, but get it in by the original deadline if you can! @Psycho @ATRL Username @luckystrike @MusicLoverDude @Not Like The Movies @EriKills @Post Malone @Auburn Sent my votes in a couple hours ago!
shelven Posted October 27, 2023 Posted October 27, 2023 SHELVEN'S CRITIQUES I'm too exhausted to correct the inevitable typos in here, so um try to figure out what I meant if any sentences are incoherent I guess Spoiler ATRL Username – Beatopia – The Perfect Pair The parts of your explanation that speak the song’s lyrical content work well – you not only explain why the message of the song is bleak, but also why the message is delivered in a bleaker way than other songs on the album. I’m having a bit more difficulty with the parts of your explanation that try to sell the song as gloomy or dark sonically. Even though it’s in a minor key, there’s elements of the production that feel like the flowery and light sound that you claim this song is unique for not having. The adjectives you use to describe the instrumentation and beat feel a bit like you took a conclusion-first approach of deciding those elements were bleak and then working backwards to justify it. I realize this is somewhat subjective on my part so I won’t dock you too hard for it, but this explanation wasn’t quite enough to convince me the song is as dark and gloomy as you say it is. ___________________________________________________ Auburn – The Velvet Rope – What About You consistently do a very good job at giving us a lot of depth in your explanations despite the small word limits. Your explanations never feel phoned in or generic! In this case, you paint a detailed picture of why this song is so dark for Janet, focusing on the heavy lyrical themes while also bringing in some sonic aspects to sell it further. That said, I would have liked to see a more explicit discussion of why this song is the darkest song on the album, as opposed to just a dark song. You don’t directly reference the rest of the album at all here, so I think you missed the “most” part of the prompt. ___________________________________________________ Dessy – Jaguar II – Cadillac (A Pimp’s Anthem) Whew this explanation was really a TRIP from start to finish. Points for entertainment value, but in terms of meeting the theme, you lose me after the first few sentences. The “skipping on clouds” imagery is great for describing a lighthearted song, but the rest of your reasons seem to equate excitement and sleekness with lightheartedness, which I don’t think are quite the same thing. Also, like I just said in Auburn’s critique, there’s no reference to the rest of your album here, so you don’t quite hit the “most” aspect of the prompt. ___________________________________________________ EriKills – Trouble – Marlboro Lights I think you fell victim to the same critique I had for you in Round 1, which is that you’ve picked out isolated moments from this song that are consistent with your explanation, but ignore parts that actively contradict it. There’s certainly some dark and sad moments in these lyrics (and I agree the instrumental evokes feelings of loneliness and despair), but the lyrics have a throughline of hope in them that weakens your argument. She talks about how she’s healing and the last chorus in particular suggests she’s still ultimately holding on to hope, even if it’s naïve. Perhaps the dark elements of this song are enough to make it the darkest song on the album despite the hints of light, but I wish you had made that argument directly instead of ignoring the lighter parts of the song altogether. ___________________________________________________ luckystrike – Bloom – Bloom Ok wow, grab my attention with that opening sentence! I think your explanation of queerness and sexual pleasure as lightheartedness is intuitive and explained well here. I do wish you hadn’t spent essentially half of your explanation quoting lyrics, though – I think those words could have been better used going into a bit more detail on some of your surface-level descriptions of the sonic aspects of the song (instead of just describing things as light, airy and upbeat) and giving us more detail on why the theme of this song is either unique to the album or better represented on this song compared to other songs on the album. ___________________________________________________ minho – HYPNOS – Xtasy I think the structure of your explanation works very well – by starting off with telling us why house music as a genre contributes to lightheartedness, your later statements that the song’s house elements make it a lighthearted song feel earned and grounded instead of just a generic statement. I also think you tie in various aspects of the song to theme in a concise yet convincing way. Like I’ve said for a few other already, I just wish you had compared the song to the rest of the album so that I better understand why this is the most lighthearted track instead of just one lighthearted one. Is this the only house song on the album? Does it embody the lightheartedness of that genre the best? Answering those questions would have elevated this further. ___________________________________________________ MusicLoverDude – Midnights – Paris Your focus on the lyrical content of this song is the stronger part of your explanation – you provide multiple, concrete examples of why this is a cheerful and lighthearted song for Taylor. The production and vocal delivery side is where you lose me a bit. While I do appreciate that you directly compared this song to others on the album (not nearly enough people have done that so far), you made an error which I’ve pointed out to others in earlier rounds: you gave me reasons to doubt your choice! You singled out two songs which I think would be very strong contenders for the most lighthearted song on the album, so I’m kind of left wondering why you didn’t pick either of those songs for this round. While you do make an attempt to explain why this song is more lighthearted than those two, I think it either needed to be more convincing or you needed to instead reference other songs which contrast against your pick more clearly. ___________________________________________________ nostalgic – Dignity – No Work, All Play I’ll be honest, I read this entry a few times because its connection to the theme initially confused me, and after a few reads I’m still not exactly clear why this is the most lighthearted song on the album or if that’s even what you’re trying to tell me at all. There’s some isolated parts of your explanation that feel like you’re trying to convince me this is the most lighthearted track (especially when you say this song is a break from the themes of infidelity and Hollywood woes), but other parts of your description seem to actively contradict this being the most lighthearted song on the album, like when you say that the song makes the listener stop dancing and is meant to be reflective and act as a warning of sorts. I can definitely imagine myself being convinced that this song is the most lighthearted song on the album, but I think you overthought your explanation and made it more complex than it needed to be for this theme. ___________________________________________________ Not Like The Movies – CTRL – Pretty Little Birds Okay I’ve been desperately waiting for an entry like this! I think you check basically every box here. You clearly explain why this song is more lighthearted than the rest of your album and you balance both the lyrical content and the production/instrumentation to paint a very vivid picture of why this song is light and blissful. The cherry on top here is the way you expertly balance complimenting your album as a whole by acknowledging its cohesiveness, while also using that as another opportunity to explain why this song stands out from the others in term of its lightness. Really good job! ___________________________________________________ PinkBox – Rebel Heart – Messiah Your interpretation of why these lyrics are dark-spirited is quite convincing. If I was considering the lyrics on my own, I’m not sure I would have left thinking they were super dark, but your explanation is logical and I can understand your perspective. That said, you make the same error a lot of people made this round, which is you don’t even reference the rest of the album or make any attempt to explain why this the darkest track instead of just one dark one. I also wish you had balanced the lyrical side and the production side a bit better instead of tacking a high-level sentence about the production onto the end, since I think the dramatic nature of the production would have helped your argument. ___________________________________________________ Post Malone – Unapologetic – Phresh Out The Runway Wow, this is absolutely night and day (no pun intended) from your entry last round for me. Every sentence of this explanation is used well here – you touch on each of production, vocals and lyrics in a concise but convincing way that all ties together to your overall thesis of why this song embodies lightheartedness. And I love your final sentence, which not only meets the part of the theme that asks you to compare the song to the rest of the album, but does so in an insightful way that brings the overall narrative of the album to the forefront. You really said you may be on the bottom of the leaderboard but you’re not going down without a motherf*cking fight!! ___________________________________________________ Psycho – Emotion – I Really Like You This is one of those rare choices that is so obviously and objectively connected to the theme that it’s honestly really hard to mess up with your explanation. And you don’t! You paint a very clear picture of why all aspects of this song are the definition of lighthearted, and I like your choice to compare this song to Carly’s previous work in a way that implies it’s unique on this album in that sense. My one small critique is I think that last sentence could have been fleshed out a bit more (it’s an interesting idea but you kind of tease it instead of really explain it), but this is a very solid entry overall. ___________________________________________________ stupidjock – Mercurial World – Unconditional I realize I sound like a broken record at this point, but this is another entry that really would have benefitted from being clearer on why this song is not just a lighthearted song, but is the most lighthearted song on the album. Like a few others, you don’t reference the rest of the album at all here, but unlike a lot of the others who also didn’t do that, I don’t think you go into enough depth about the song itself to justify that exclusion (particularly since you had over 50 words to spare). There’s a good start to an entry here, but it feels unfinished. ___________________________________________________ ultraviolence.xx – RAVEN – Divorce Oop educate us with that music theory, king! I’ve waffled back and forth on how well I think your overly technical style of explanations works – I think it harmed you a bit last round, but I think it works better here since this theme is more open to an objective interpretation. I do think you could have slightly pared down some of the technical analysis in favour of fleshing out that intriguing but unfinished first thought (how does the rest of the album strike a balance, and what about the rest of the album does this song’s sharp turn into darkness not do?), but overall this was an interesting read and it served its purpose for this type of theme. ___________________________________________________ wehavetostan – The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess – My Kink Is Karma I’m living for the camp of your final two-word sentence tbh. From a lyrical perspective, this is a flawless explanation. You use specific, logical examples of the darkness of this song’s lyrical content and you use multiple opportunities to directly explain why that lyrical content is a step darker than the rest of the album. I think this could have been a bit stronger by fleshing out the production side a bit more – an argument can be made that there’s an almost playful aspect to the instrumentation, so I would have like to hear you counter that and explain why you think that contributes to the overall darkness of the song. But a pretty strong entry overall. @Psycho @ATRL Username @luckystrike @MusicLoverDude @Dessy @minho @Not Like The Movies @stupidjock @EriKills @Post Malone @ultraviolence.xx @Auburn @wehavetostan @PinkBox @nostalgic 1
MusicLoverDude Posted October 27, 2023 Posted October 27, 2023 oof that kinda hurt @shelven I understand your point. But since I already brought up how the production on Karma and Bejeweled was still pretty moody despite being a bit light-hearted too, I thought I made my point. Paris had a more lighthearted lyrical content, vocal delivery and production as a whole, and that's why I chose it. The lyrical content is there in all three songs, but it's there in a bigger way with Paris and the production and vocal delivery seal the deal and that's what I explained in my essay. Oh well, all I can do is continue working on doing better.
Kern Posted October 27, 2023 Posted October 27, 2023 (edited) I don't know why I didn't think of comparing my song to others on the album, that was excatly the thing I needed to complete my entry I don't wanna go just yet Edited October 27, 2023 by stupidjock
Dessy Posted October 27, 2023 Posted October 27, 2023 Yesss more pannings I focused on excitement for the light aspect but I should've done a different imagery if it was misleading. It's just what popped in my head at first
nostalgic Posted October 27, 2023 Posted October 27, 2023 @Sanguine will the results be announced soon?
Sanguine Posted October 28, 2023 Author Posted October 28, 2023 2 hours ago, nostalgic said: @Sanguine will the results be announced soon? Hopefully just waiting on Element
Kern Posted October 28, 2023 Posted October 28, 2023 6 minutes ago, Sanguine said: Hopefully just waiting on Element About to take a break from torturing us on Survivor to lash and pan in this game 2
ATRL Moderator Element Posted October 28, 2023 ATRL Moderator Posted October 28, 2023 ELEMENT'S CRITIQUES (and they all exist this time actually!) Spoiler @ATRL Username - Beatopia - The Perfect Pair First of all, I really enjoyed this song and I might save it to my playlists! I think this was a good submission, with some strong justification as to why both the production and lyrics contribute to the dramatic and darkly cinematic environment. Calling out the minor key in comparison to the rest of the songs was an intelligent way to show how this is truly the darkest on the album. I agree that the brooding violins, wispy flutes, and lack of guitars also contributed. I am not sure if I'm completely sold on the bossa nova beat driving anxiety -- I actually found it to be a bit calming. Regardless, I support this! @Auburn - The Velvet Rope - What About This is a well written explanation, and I enjoyed the direct quote from Janet as your introduction. Lyrically, I do wish you did the same with a quote or two from the song -- since it has a lot to offer. What is also missing here is any argument that this is darkest song on the album. It very well could be, and I wouldn't be surprised based on the explosive chorus. However, there was no mention of the other songs on the album and how this compares, so that will hold this entry back from getting a higher score. I still think the song is a sensible choice, as the contrast between the verses and chorus are very effective in driving home the intense emotion! @Dessy - Jaguar II - Cadillac (A Pimp's Anthem) I see the vision... I do. The fact that 1/3 of this entry is explaining the smoothness of the female anatomy is kind of taking me out That essay space probably could have been used to focus more on the song itself but it still gave me quite an interesting life lesson!! The lyrics definitely felt like they were on the right track here, but I think some of the production/instrumentation needed further justification. I also would have loved to see comparisons to the other songs on the record, to help us understand why this specifically is the most lighthearted track. @EriKills - Trouble - Malboro Lights You begin your song with an enthusiastic claim -- "The darkest song from Trouble just HAS to be Marlboro Lights". But while you emphasize this, you don't tell us more about how it compares to the other songs on the album and how it must be the darkest. Now, do you make a decent exposition of the song's individual dark elements? Yes, for sure. The sentence discussing suicidal ideation and how it specifically elevates the song from "sad" to "dark" is a strong argument. You cover the instrumentation as well, and I agree with how the piano contributes to creating such a solemn atmosphere. @luckystrike - Bloom - Bloom First of all, "What is more playful, carefree and fun than butt sex? Not many things!" sounds like it should be one of those clickbait article titles right next to "How To Actually Make Friends as An Adult" and "5 Ways You're A Financial Flop" or whatever I absolutely love this song and I think it's a good choice for "lightness". Now here's the problem -- I feel like your explanation circles around hitting what we were looking for, but it never fully gets there. You start off strong by saying that Bloom "serves as the most fun moment of the album", but you never really show us a direct comparison as to why it is more fun/lighthearted than these other tracks. "Embracing queerness through sex" would have been a good aspect to focus on - perhaps the other songs demonstrate some more reservation or anxiety in this area? There wasn't much description of the instrumentation/production, and the lyrics were not really used to move the argument forward. They were kind of just inserted into the middle of the essay. If you further dissected the "nature" metaphor and explained how fountains/trees/etc contribute to visualization of a light environment, then this would have been stronger. @minho - Hypnos - Xtasy I think this entry is your strongest since the audition! We love a comeback! Discussing the history of house music and its important role as a place of escape and joy for marginalized communities was a thoughtful and intelligence perspective to bring to the table. This approach also ties back to your audition round where you introduced the album and how it deeply appreciates musical history. You described the production and vocal delivery in an effective manner. The lyrical discussion was a bit generalized and the entry could have used some more specific references. I also have been commenting on most entries about how they could have been stronger with a comparison to the other tracks (i.e. demonstrating how they are the "most" light or dark). While you didn't do this directly, I feel like broader context is a sufficient-enough alternative. @MusicLoverDude - Midnights - Paris Very very good entry!! You did a great job of contrasting this song with the others on the album. I disagree with shelven, and I actually like how you called out runners-up "Karma" and "Bejeweled" as direct comparison points. The production drags their light-heartedness down, but raises Paris' up. Although, I will admit that you would need to know those other songs well in order to understand the context. So maybe this thought could have been expanded (if you had more word count available). You hit all the marks for me otherwise - highlighting the production and vocal delivery's cheerfulness. The lyrical reference to the simplicity and joy of a shady tree is a great pick. You could have also highlighted the frolic and fun of a night out with wine and a view, as she so vividly describes. Nice job all around! @nostalgic - Dignity - No Work, All Play Hmmm... I'm struggling a bit with this one. You kind of make an even argument for this song being both light AND dark, which really throws everything off within the context of the challenge prompt. It is a technically well written and interesting essay, but I think it doesn't meet the goals of what we were looking for. The song's production and instrumentation definitely meets the "light" criteria, but the lyrics are pretty dark and serious tbh. @Not Like The Movies - CTRL - Pretty Little Birds After reading your essays for a few rounds now, I think you have a fantastic and deep understanding of this album. You are able to properly interpret the themes and apply them to the intricacies of CTRL. This is no exception. You have one of the strongest demonstrations this round of how your song is the "most" light of the entire album. You directly contrast the "intimate and romantic" lyrics here to those of "struggles and chaos" in other songs. You also compare the "mellow and relaxing" production to the rest of the album's "louder" atmosphere. My one recommendation to improve is to integrate a few more direct references/quotes calling out specific lyrics. @PinkBox - Rebel Heart - Messiah I think you did a good job of explaining the darkness of the lyrics, and supported your claims with specific references and quotes therein. Madonna successfully uses this imagery to evoke the darker atmosphere, so I totally agree with your assessment there. I think you missed an opportunity to expand on the production aspects a bit more. Finally, as with many entries this round, there is not really any comparison to other tracks on the album. I can infer by the ominous lyricism that this could be the darkest track on the album, but you did not explain that directly. @Post Malone - Unapologetic - Phresh Out The Runway Hello?? Good morning? You just woke up and absolutely slayed! This was exactly what we were looking for this round. You provided fantastic details about the production, the vocal delivery, the personality, and the lyrics -- and how all of them are light-hearted. Most importantly, the sentences discussing "Phresh's" position in the broader narrative of the album seal the deal. You explain exactly why this is the case, and calling out specific songs that have contrasting serious/emotional themes was a great choice. Not a single word of this essay is wasted. Everything supports your central argument. Great job! @Psycho - Emotion - I Really Like You I absolutely agree with this selection; this song is bubblegum euphoria beyond belief! I remember feeling so much childlike joy at her concert when she played IRLY... it was just so fun and amazing and happy. Your essay gets the job done, covering both the sonic and lyrical components. You get some points for using specific lyrics and examples. Unfortuntately, I didn't see any reference to the other songs on the album and how IRLY is lighter than those. I have no problem inferring that it could be the best selection for this prompt on the album. However, I would have loved to hear about the "various emotions" referenced in your final sentence, and how they contrast directly with this song's themes and production. @stupidjock - Mercurial World - Unconditional Sadly, I found this to be a pretty generic essay, especially comparing it to your previous rounds where you have always been able to connect something more thoughtful, engaging, or even personal into the mix. I don't totally agree with your assessment of these lyrics being light-hearted; some are and some are a bit dramatic. I think the production aspects are fine and accurate enough. The biggest missing component is the comparison to other songs on the album. There is no reference to show us how the other songs on Mercurial World aren't as light-hearted. @ultraviolence.xx - Raven - Divorce I'm always impressed by how many different concepts and details you are able to pull into such a succinct writeup. The struggles of Sisyphus were important to highlight, making for quite a poignant literary inspiration. I appreciated the lyrical callback (showing how the lyric has changed from curiousity to mourning) as it helps us stay connected to the overall album narrative. The instrumentation is gorgeous and evokes a melancholy visual -- the dark gray cloud cover is accurate, like you depict. You did a fantastic job of exploring music theory within the constraints of the word limit as well. Very interesting!! Finally, I would have loved to learn more about the "balance" in the other songs. Some more details or specific song titles envoking this comparison would have been great! But this is a really strong entry overall. @wehavetostan - The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess - My Kink Is Karma Very nice! You juxtaposed the lyrical themes of this song with other songs on the album in an effective manner. Leaning into the sadistic themes was a strong baseline. I do think this song is "camp" in a way that you could argue it is a bit lighthearted and comical too. This entry would have benefitted from a line or two on the production choices - but I can't complain too much tbh. 2 1
Sanguine Posted October 28, 2023 Author Posted October 28, 2023 Results are readyyyy @Psycho @ATRL Username @luckystrike @MusicLoverDude @Dessy @minho @Not Like The Movies @stupidjock @EriKills @Post Malone @ultraviolence.xx @Auburn @wehavetostan @PinkBox @nostalgic
Sanguine Posted October 28, 2023 Author Posted October 28, 2023 11th (round) @PinkBox with Messiah Judges: 20.5 Contestants: -1 Points: 15.125 11th cumulatively with 46.5 total points 10th (round) @EriKills with Malboro Lights Judges: 21.5 Contestants: +6 Points: 17.625 7th cumulatively with 57.75 total points
Sanguine Posted October 28, 2023 Author Posted October 28, 2023 Have these typed up in advance this time so I'm not scrambling the whole results show
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