discussion What is the most hurtful thing a guy/crush/boyfriend said/did to you ?

[FailSafe]

Cheat on me 

[dussel_06]

“I’m sorry. I’m gay too. But I’m not just attracted to you.” (Making a move after I have found out he’s hooking up with other guys)

[Dr. Alexander]

55 minutes ago, KBax said:

so he messaged me online later and said "Awe you think I'm cute that's so sweet" and so we talked for a bit and he seemed interested so I asked him if he wanted to go out sometime and he laughed and said "You're ******* ugly what makes me think I'd go out with someone like you"

 

Please tell me that you’re trolling. 

[Selegend]

My first ex cheated. Probably more than once.
 

My second boyfriend just was incredibly selfish. He never did or said nothing bad, it just sucked dating someone that selfish so i broke up. 
 

thats pretty much it.

it was sad tho cuz my first bf was a good boyfriend (i was very happy during the relationship) but not loyal and my second bf was loyal but selfish so i was unhappy during the relationship. I just cant win. 

Edited June 1, 2023 by Selegend

[TROPICUM]

"Nobody will ever love you like I do"

[kipperskipper]

He hit me and it felt like a kiss

 

[wehavetostan]

2 hours ago, CBC said:

we broke up and he told me my cat should die the same way my mum did

that’s horrible and I’m so sorry for your loss 

[KBax]

24 minutes ago, Dr. Alexander said:

 

Please tell me that you’re trolling. 

I'm not lol

[Delirious]

1 hour ago, KBax said:

I'm not lol

You dodged a bullet I fear.

 

Who the **** says something like that? Literally mental behaviour. Projecting maybe

[Kiss It Better]

we were arguing and he knew i was s**c*d*l at the time and basically wished death on me

 

Spoiler

but then i replied "then k*** me" 

 

[AMIT]

3 hours ago, CBC said:

we broke up and he told me my cat should die the same way my mum did

Jesus.  

 

I am sorry for your loss. 

 

All y'all stories are making me feel bad, y'all don't deserve this. Wish you all well. 

[reymiu]

After reading this thread I want to be straight now. Men are the worst when it comes to dealing with their emotions

[WildOne]

Ex and I were trying to be friends after the break up. At a game night we were playing WNRS and he got the question "who was your first love," to which he responds "I've never been in love" in front of all my friends who had SEEN us say "I love you" literally countless times over our relationship. It was so awkward.  

 

I can't believe I was sad about him at the time 

[highwind44029]

Ghosted me, it really sucks not knowing why they did it, for a while I started gaslighting yourself into thinking that I was a terrible friend, but in the end I choose to believe that they were just a coward.

[Boysdontcry]

I had my first relationship when I was 20. I loved him so much that maybe it became a bit more of an idealisation / obsession.

 

Anyway he started to fall out of love with me. And I fought so hard for over a month to try and keep it going. But in the end he told me he didn’t love me anymore.

 

I was very bitter & angry. And this was my first heartbreak. I lashed out and told him his acne was disgusting (something I knew he was insecure about & it never even bothered me). And I said a couple other hurtful things.

 

We got back in contact a year later & he told me it had really affected him. I deeply apologised.
 

It‘ll be 3 years since we broke up this year & I still feel really bad about it.

[Fevesy]

My first BF would cling to me a lot and then suddenly hate me for a few days for simply breathing. It was a wild rollercoaster. At first, I would naturally argue back but then I just kind of was super passive with it and took the lashings and started to believe that I was the one at fault. It's clear to me now that absolutely wasn't the case but when you're stuck in there you really believe what you're being told constantly.

 

I would get insults about my intelligence, and physical appearance but I kept around because I genuinely cared about this person and my single goal in life was to do everything to give them the best life possible. I felt like I could never suffer hardship because they always had it worse - I had a complicated relationship with my father and didn't see him for 12 years. During the relationship, my father reached out to me and I went for lunch with and mid lunch I would get a text from my BF like "Oh, I am glad that some of us can have a good time with their father" when it was the first time I saw the man in 12 years  So I was made to feel guilty for that.

 

He then cheated on me twice and in both cases, I knew it was going on but for months I was made out to be like I was crazy and delusional when I brought it up or said anything. On the second time, I got concrete proof eventually since I suspected it for months I think I truly snapped after years of mental torture and I've never seen or heard from them since 

  

7 hours ago, CBC said:

we broke up and he told me my cat should die the same way my mum did

wtf 

[May]

when i was 17 i made a fake grindr to pop up to my ex-bf to find out the tea of what he really thought of me, by steering the conversation to be about ex's etc.

 

he said that i "had no personality"

 

ive been told much worse things throughout my life but that's definitely the most impactful and hurtful and those words kinda changed the entire trajectory of my life bc from that point on i made it my mission to NEVER let anyone see me as boring or bland ever again  

[katara]

10 hours ago, MoonGoodandHappy said:

What is the most hurtful thing a guy/crush or boyfriend said/did to you ? 

 

One day a guy crush said to me that i was cute enough to sleep with him but not to have a serious relationship with him.   

 

Another day, one of my ex boyfriend ghosted me without any explanation. After months of relationships i wake up and he was not there anymore. 

 

 

What's yours ?

 

Mess I just did this to a guy recently  He was trying to push for a relationship but I just wanted a quick f**k (he is a shallow insta gay so totally incompatible but good for a f**k).

 

He got really toxic after that and started throwing vile insults my way out of thin air. We hadn't met yet so he had no clue about me. 

It's funny coz when I saw him on Tinder I thought to myself that he has a face of an evil toxic twink and that's how it turned out to be. 

 

Bullet = Dodged

[Kylie Jenner]

We broke up and I moved to a new city and he found me on Grindr a couple months after and told me that I am so ugly and that he never found me attractive and I deserve to get hit by a bus

[Dr. Alexander]

1 hour ago, May said:

those words kinda changed the entire trajectory of my life bc from that point on i made it my mission to NEVER let anyone see me as boring or bland ever again  

So you’re living a lie with a forced and fake personality? 

[May]

51 minutes ago, Dr. Alexander said:

So you’re living a lie with a forced and fake personality? 

probably yeh! but it's good for me too - im acc a very quiet and introverted person who would rather never talk to anybody and just spend all my free time on my own. however i know that living that way isn't healthy and would cause me depression in the future. so if i have to act extroverted and crazy and fun then it's a win-win bc ppl like me more and im not setting my future up to be a crazy cat lady

[skwonderfactory]

I have a few:

• My first boyfriend told me he dated me because he was only physically attracted to me and there was no emotional connection. Mind you, this was only after I broke up with him after I caught his pedophile self for virtually cheating on me (only texts and video calls) with a 15 year old girl and he was 29. He lied and said he was 19; thank God I stopped it before they met in person and now me and that girl are close friends, despite being ten years apart. Being autistic has its advantages like that sometimes.

• My second boyfriend and my first love tried to gaslight me into thinking it was my fault for having gay friends because he has baggage from his ex who cheated on him with someone he claimed was only a friend. I told my ex-boyfriend I was a different person and he believed that until a couple weeks later he decided to break up because I betrayed his trust and hurt him by continuing to talk to my gay friend, despite him giving zero indication he was still hurt and that it was okay for me to do so.

 

• And finally my last ex had a few things that bothered him about me that he did not mention or even bring up until the day he decided to break up with me after giving me the silent treatment for two days. His excuse was he’ is bad with confrontation and didn’t see how terrible of a person I was until up to recently. Apparently I’m racist and terrible overall, though we continued to talk as semi-friends. However, his life did fa apart in many other aspects after we broke up—his mother died, he lost his job, his best friend decided she was moving to Canada, and his second closest friend stopped talking to him—and I supported him as a friend until he blocked me. And that was that.

 

• Bonus: Some guy who was never my boyfriend but I went on one date with told me we shouldn’t date and he wasn’t ready for a relationship because his therapist said so. During our first date, he told me he was looking forward to dating again and his therapist agreed it was a good idea. So obviously there was something else going on I had no idea about rather it’s internal issues, loss of interest in me, and/or he had someone else who was “better”. I don’t care though and it’s not bad at all.

 

 

 

All-in-all I am grateful for my shi*ty dating/relationship experiences because I’ve been with the love of my life for almost seven months and I couldn’t be happier. It’s an extremely healthy relationship where I am supported and accepted for nothing but myself and that goes both ways. Plus, their not even a guy so I won.

[John Slayne]

reading this thread is making me realise how lucky i am  my lowest point with guys was when my ex broke up with me out of nowhere, but i don't hold it against him. we're still friends

[John Slayne]

17 hours ago, Kiss It Better said:

we were arguing and he knew i was s**c*d*l at the time and basically wished death on me

 

  Hide contents

but then i replied "then k*** me" 

 

omg... i know it's baaaaddd but i cackled 

[butterflymimi]

one particular very abusive ex would call me useless a lot to the point where its become a trigger word for me. (keeping in mind he was on benefits smoking pot all day everyday doing **** all whilst I was at work whilst balancing my last year of uni, he had full control of my finances whilst I saw nothing, etc. the story goes on a lot )

 

idk I think it has made me more sensitive about what people say behind my back and stuff