tournament ? DIAMOND HIT ? Farewell / Next Season Announcement pg.328 ?

[swiftie13]

blossoming-romance-katy-perry-was-just-spotted-sit-5404

 

lhjkh;

[Jackson]

1 minute ago, swiftie13 said:

blossoming-romance-katy-perry-was-just-spotted-sit-5404

 

lhjkh;

WHAT IS THIS 

[swiftie13]

Quote

“They seem really happy together,” says a source close to the couple. “Katy couldn’t stop gushing about how Steven was able to clean up his hard drive and free up additional storage space. It definitely seems like she’s ready to move on from Orlando [Bloom].”

 

[Jackson]

but we need the judges to write the reviews 

[swiftie13]

 

ROUND 7 REVIEWS  PT.  II

 

Aurora

 

The opening line is so messy, I can’t stop focusing on it.

 

ANYWAY. This sounded like pompous AP English poetry and while it was pretty, most of it was not lyrical and it actually detracted from the meaning. The tenses were also a bit rough. This is style over substance. But who am I to talk? Case in point: A Sunflower’s Dance. This was a bit long, however. Poetic language works well with short and sweet songs, whereas in longer ones like yours, it feels overbearing and even pretentious, especially with a concept as simple as yours. I do find it beautifully written otherwise, so no offense to you as a writer in general. “Pretty stars tell pretty lies,” is perfect. Do you write outside of PH? You truly are gifted! I’m just not so sure about this entry’s lyricism. 

 

ughgabriel 

 

Wow, the flow in Prologue is pretty much impeccable. And to top it off, the language is beautiful, concise, and no quality is sacrificed in order to fit within the meter or rhyme scheme, at least for the most part. I do think however, that the second verse was weaker than the first. It almost felt redundant and the bridge was a bit melodramatic especially with the lips/kiss rhyme. Epilogue opens just as gracefully despite the change in structure. The chorus fell a little flat (and it’s 'should’ve given' not 'should’ve gave'). I feel like the first stanza was poignant enough to be the chorus. The other two brought it down. The bliss/abyss rhyme stuck out like a sore thumb although I’m trying not to be too harsh on easy rhymes. I see what you mean by the color/dolor rhyme and as a Spanish speaker myself, I get it, but again it sticks out in a negative way. The outro was sentimental and while it wasn’t completely necessary, it wrapped this unique entry quite well. Kudos for thinking outside the box! I always value originality, especially when executed this well.

 

Jackson 

 

“[…] of when I thought that you cared,” is clunky and it’s quite obvious that it’s meant to fit the meter but seeing as it makes sense within the context of the song, I can’t really penalize you too much for it. Plus it's really pedantic of me. However, I’ve seen you be more effortless and clever. Immediately you make up for that and MORE with the killer couplet, “Your heart's five hundred miles from mine in someone else's room / He holds your body captive as I come to rescue you.” Wow. What is it with this round and poignant couplets? You did that. The ten minutes til takeoff/to landing is classic Jackson. It’s the clever and effortless I was talking about. The way you showcased the passage of time so simply but so impressively. I know it’s small but man, that’s what writers do. The chorus is jarring, although beautiful on its own, because in no way do you make room for water imagery to suddenly appear, even if the bottle is classic (hackneyed) imagery. It feels more about air than water. Overall, I love how the verses are very simple but they hit the nail in the head. The length was ideal as well. The only real mishap here was the inconsistent metaphors between the verses and chorus. 

 

Edited February 14, 2017 by swiftie13

[swiftie13]

Ok girls, I'm up to four WPs. I may be in danger, but I will cool it with trying to keep people woke for the sake of DH and my recent judging position. H8rs can SEETHE tho

[swiftie13]

oh and 

@Aurora @ughgabriel @Jackson

 

I guess

[ceremonials]

where is that list of the most active posters

 

idk how to find it

[swiftie13]

for atrl overall or the thread?

[swiftie13]

• keshaspearsxo

  Jan 18, 17

  492 posts
• Jackson

  Jan 18, 17

  455 posts
• ceremonials

  Jan 28, 17

  429 posts
• Temporal

  Jan 19, 17

  230 posts
• ughgabriel

  Jan 21, 17

  222 posts
• Hug

  Jan 18, 17

  208 posts
• Aurora

  Jan 19, 17

  190 posts
• Corsola

  Jan 21, 17

  190 posts
• SaintWest

  1:04PM

  178 posts
• swiftie13

  Jan 21, 17

  161 posts

Edited February 14, 2017 by swiftie13

[ceremonials]

1 minute ago, swiftie13 said:

for atrl overall or the thread?

overall. but oh wow @ me being 3rd

[swiftie13]

Just now, ceremonials said:

overall. but oh wow @ me being 3rd

idk then!

[ughgabriel]

Thank you @swiftie13 I'm glad you liked it 

[ughgabriel]

Not 224 of my 238 posts being from this thread 

[swiftie13]

poor the other three, my reviews won't be coming till like 24 hours from now cause I'm preoccupied now xoxo

[khalyan]

Oh at me not on the top ten posters list..

[Jackson]

51 minutes ago, ceremonials said:

where is that list of the most active posters

 

idk how to find it

I know how to find it  

[ceremonials]

Just now, Jackson said:

I know how to find it  

tell me bitch

[Jackson]

Just now, ceremonials said:

tell me bitch

https://atrl.net/search/?type=core_members&group[20]=1&group[7]=1&group[4]=1&group[3]=1&group[6]=1&group[17]=1&group[13]=1&group[10]=1&group[18]=1&group[14]=1&sortby=member_posts&sortdirection=desc&page=1

[Jackson]

ew i didnt realize i was the #3 poster on the site 

[ceremonials]

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[ceremonials]

Just now, ceremonials said:

{"ns":"yt","el":"detailpage","cpn":"A3eMQ5PBniEUnHRf","docid":"A_j_7zZKpSM","ver":2,"referrer":"https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=brenda+meeks","cmt":"141.806","plid":"AAVIcIXVeW7WCh67","ei":"miuiWM2vDtPHuAK46IiADA","fmt":"135","fs":"0","rt":"55.368","of":"LDNvIXvHQ2rpOh6h8l6vig","adformat":null,"content_v":null,"euri":"","lact":2,"live":null,"cl":"147070178","mos":0,"osid":null,"state":"8","vm":"CAEQAQ","volume":61,"c":"WEB","cver":"1.20170209","cplayer":"UNIPLAYER","cbr":"Firefox","cbrver":"51.0","cos":"Windows","cosver":"10.0","hl":"en_US","cr":"US","len":"630.381","fexp":"9406113,9419451,9422596,9428398,9431012,9433221,9434046,9434289,9434905,9438965,9439211,9439580,9439882,9441513,9446054,9446364,9447923,9449034,9449243,9450059,9450143,9450950,9451345,9451873,9455154,9456640,9457019,9457141,9457332,9457494,9458061,9458341,9459500,9459691,9459974,9460102,9460176,9460440,9460482,9460727,9461561,9461984,9461991,9462738","afmt":"251","vct":"141.806","vd":"630.381","vpl":"84.916-120.056,140.354-141.806,478.000-480.054,","vbu":"81.920-200.001,476.160-506.880,","vpa":false,"vsk":false,"ven":false,"vpr":1,"vrs":4,"vns":2,"vec":null,"vvol":0.61,"lct":"141.724","lsk":false,"lmf":false,"lbw":"1122833.948","lhd":"0.114","lst":"468.477","laa":"itag=251,seg=19,range=2841706-2967041,time=190.0-200.0","lva":"itag=135,seg=39,range=13104454-13424743,time=199.7-204.8","lar":"itag=251,seg=19,range=2841706-2967041,time=190.0-200.0","lvr":"itag=135,seg=39,range=13104454-13424743,time=199.7-204.8","lvh":"r13---sn-bvvbax-hn2k","lab":"80.001-200.001,470.001-506.941,","lvb":"81.920-204.800,476.160-506.880,","ismb":19920000,"debug_videoId":"A_j_7zZKpSM","0sz":false,"op":"1","yof":false,"dis":"","cgr":true,"debug_playbackQuality":"large","debug_date":"Mon Feb 13 2017 15:57:38 GMT-0600 (Central Standard Time)"}

oh

 

i meant to post this

 

https://www.dubtrack.fm/join/platinumhitz

[Temporal]

I better slay as the 167th highest poster

[ceremonials]

ff

 

i think i was one page 2

[swiftie13]

am not even gonna look for myself