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Bf still on Grindr after 10 months


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Posted
1 minute ago, Oktober Knight said:

Nothing would change between my husband and I, we'd be back to where we were 10 months ago 

But if your husband still wants to be with him or vice versa? Wouldn't that be weird?

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  • Oktober Knight

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Posted

He's wasting your time. Be serious and have some self respect… clearly you want / expect different things from this relationship. This feels like a big slap in the face to me! Best wishes to you. You deserve someone who's willing to get on your level 

Posted

Now why this thread reminded me of this? :skull:

 

 

 

I don't know, this is exactly why I wouldn't be in an open relationship, it all gets too complicated and limits get confusing :psyduck: if you are in a open relationship with your husband, why can't the other guy be in a open relationship with other people? :psyduck: Ok, so you guys talked and agreed it was a closed relationship between the three of you, but it just not logical! Why you guys can but he can't? :psyduck: You're either open, or closed, not this in between situation... you can't have it all sis.

 

 

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Posted
7 minutes ago, Slayn said:

If you have a husband and BOTH have this bf, why would you want this third wheel to be only devoted to you guys anyway? Seems wrong to the third party to me, but if you're annoyed dump him I guess.. I don't know how easy it would be to find someone willing to be in the kind of relationship you are describing.

‼️

 

Like how can you want a fluid/open relationship or whatever the hell it's called, but that 'fluidity' only applies to the two in the married couple and they want to restrict what the 'third' does. Chi...

 

tiffany-pollard-498-x-424-gif-de0kfnsr53hloz59.gif

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Posted (edited)

Normal relantionships are complicated, why complicate it more by adding another person? that screams trouble :deadbanana:

 

Anyway, your "bf" doesn't take what you guys have as something serious so why waste time on him? Dump him and move on.

Edited by UnusualBoy
Posted
3 minutes ago, Littlejfrey said:

Now why this thread reminded me of this? :skull:

 

 

 

I don't know, this is exactly why I wouldn't be in an open relationship, it all gets too complicated and limits get confusing :psyduck: if you are in a open relationship with your husband, why can't the other guy be in a open relationship with other people? :psyduck: Ok, so you guys talked and agreed it was a closed relationship between the three of you, but it just not logical! Why you guys can but he can't? :psyduck: You're either open, or closed, not this in between situation... you can't have it all sis.

 

 

Waitttt this makes so much sense. If you two are open, why is this guy closed? 

Posted

You have a husband and a boyfriend? You and your husband are essentially open but you want to be closed/exclusive with the boyfriend? 
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You know that's not fair, no matter how you paint it. Op I felt bad for you in the beginning but the revelation of the husband threw that right out the window. You bring the drama to yourself 

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Posted

Wait what happened to that throuple you had with that one other guy

Posted

Is this what gay dating has become? What's wrong with monogamy 

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Posted

Girl what is this get a grip yall have no dignity when im dickless here:clownny:

DELETE.

Posted

The way you purposely left out him being the third wheel in a marriage to make you seem in the right 

:deadbanana2: There really is two sides to every story lmao. 
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  • ATRL Administrator
Posted

Break up with your boyfriend. 

Posted

Also is your bf old so thats why yall in a throuple?

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Posted
3 hours ago, Oktober Knight said:

and even when we're out and about and he's logged in

 

3 hours ago, Oktober Knight said:

they have been snapping each other every day for a week and it seems he was a guy he hooked up with years ago that contacted him recently. They exchanged nudes, flirted a lot, and talked about how much fun they had years ago in bed

 

3 hours ago, Oktober Knight said:

When I asked about us deleting the apps all together, he gave a firm no, claiming that he wants to make more friends for us and likes flirting with others without any intention to meet them

oh my god just LEAVE that man what the **** :mazen:

Posted
1 minute ago, Venice B said:

 

 

oh my god just LEAVE that man what the **** :mazen:

read the whole thread

 

his hypocrite ass deserves all of it

  • Haha 1
Posted

Just become a quadouple so everyone has a man of their own

Posted
Just now, Carla Rosón said:

read the whole thread

 

his hypocrite ass deserves all of it

i just got to the throuple plotwist and i'm honestly so confused

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Posted

I understand wanting boundaries, even in a poly relationship, but it seems like this dude signaled his intentions early on anyway and you chose to ignore that sign to the point of being suspicious enough to go through his messages. This was never going to work. 

Posted

OP you honestly give scary level of narcissist/manipulative.

 

1. People who tend to have multiple partners are narcissists even if the partners in question are okay with it. (Just imagine how narcissistic men with 10 wives are)

 

2. From the information given it seems you are the ones who sets the controls and boundaries on all ends. You told your husband you wanted to open the relationship into 3, while also you are telling the third person how they should operate. 
 

3. You specifically knew positioning the story as a monogamous relationship when telling it would work completely in your favor and acted like you just casually decided not to be transparent. I find it hard to believe every detail you left out was something you weren't purposely aware would make your character come off questionable. 
 

 

The best advice I have is to simply recognize this all looks a mess and should probably be ended to save all parties trouble if you clearly aren't on the same page with the dynamics of the relationship. s:wan:

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Posted

omg this thread :deadbanana2:

I would advise your bf to break up with you+your husband asap.

Posted
3 hours ago, Oktober Knight said:

 

Yes I was trying to dodge confusion for the members that didn't know :rip:

 

So may as well give the full spectrum. My husband stopped using the apps early on and he doesn't give AF about our bf chatting with other guys. HOWEVER, he did say that if it bothers me so much that I need to speak up. And if our bf isn't willing to comply then a decision needs to be made. My husband is very neutral in this situation. 

I don't mean to be crass but it sounds like you are more into the boyfriend than your husband is. 

 

:suburban:

 

 

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Posted

Incompatible. Also don't let him gaslight you into feeling like you're insecure or that this is normal or respectful :toofunny2:

Posted
41 minutes ago, Ryan said:

Break up with your boyfriend. 

which one

  • ATRL Administrator
Posted
Just now, drip drop said:

which one

Aren’t him and his husband in a throuple with the boyfriend?

Posted

This is such a joke LOL.

 

I hope that BF leaves you and your husband for his own sake.

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