simplywohoo Posted June 26 Posted June 26 So today I had a little bit of beef with a gay on tiktok and he said it's not a big deal and that no gay will take it in a bad way if you're being asked THEE question. And when I thought about it a little I came to the conclusion that I actually do? Like first of all, why is it relevant to them? Why do they feel they have the right to ask ? I think it also plays along stereotypes because if you're being asked out of the blue, it's probably bc you act a certain way and that's the reason why they felt they have the right to ask. Like it's not a huuuge deal to me, especially not now as an adult and it's not like i stop talking to people after that, but back then it made me feel VERY uncomfortable, ESPECIALLY before I came out. Imo it's very invasive and lbr nowadays there's no need to ask anything like this in the first place. I also think most gays aren't exactly thrilled with this question. But what do you think about it ? Am I taking this too seriously ? 5 1 1
Darius Posted June 26 Posted June 26 I think it's weirder when people try to ask without asking ("sooo....anyone SPECIAL in your life???"). Esp coworkers and such 2 1 1
alexrex Posted June 26 Posted June 26 If it comes out of nowhere, it can be a little awkward. But whatever. There are more interesting questions to answer
Johnny Jacobs Posted June 26 Posted June 26 Yes it's luke asking if you're pregnant. If i want you to know you would've known. People nowdays loves to get inside people's underwear. Its rude 1 1
KatyPrismSpirit Posted June 26 Posted June 26 yes its rude. and most of the time, people only ask this with a negative connotation. especially if ur a poc 2 1
ChooseyLover Posted June 26 Posted June 26 (edited) I think it could be annoying. The last time it happened to me it was very uncomfortable and uncalled for. My Greek/Latin personal teacher asked me the question without any context or anything. I didn't even know how to react. Edited June 26 by ChooseyLover
visions Posted June 26 Posted June 26 Context matters ig, if I'm shopping and a group of "lads" came up giggling and asked me I'd be bothered and wanna fight a bit. If I'm in a gay club, no it wouldn't bother me. These are the extreme different ends but I think it's pretty easy to tell what the intentions are behind the question. 2 1
montacelo Posted June 26 Posted June 26 (edited) I guess context matters. But it's not like we go up to straight people and randomly ask them if they're straight, right? Edited June 26 by montacelo 4
Trent W Posted June 26 Posted June 26 I get really annoyed because Im pushing 30 and no marriage in sight I never got bothered with this BS when I was younger And is not the part gay that bothers me, is mostly the fact that most people can't process the idea that some people just want to be single for a while. People are so invasive and stupid I'm bi but very private about my personal life( I date men and women). Why are people sooo interested in other's romantic life? Like there is so much more to life than finding a partner I hate society for this tbh. 5
Gladiator Posted June 26 Posted June 26 Not really, but I haven't been asked that since middle school. I am straight passing.
dumbsparce Posted June 26 Posted June 26 (edited) It's only a big deal bc your delusion of passing as a straight man has come to an abrupt end. Bet the opposite would be a compliment right? (ps we've all been there) Edited June 26 by dumbsparce 3 4 1
theoghon Posted June 26 Posted June 26 Interestingly, someone did so at my workplace recently. I found it extremely awkward and uncalled for tbh, please mind your own business and keep pushing
Trent W Posted June 26 Posted June 26 6 minutes ago, theoghon said: Interestingly, someone did so at my workplace recently. I found it extremely awkward and uncalled for tbh, please mind your own business and keep pushing Just ask them if they wanna **** you or something, men or women would be embarrassed It's extremely invasive to ask this
Nightingale Posted June 26 Posted June 26 It would make me feel a bit awkward but I think that's just my internal issues. I don't necessarily see it as rude if someone asks
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