ATRL Administrator Popular Post Ryan Posted May 24 ATRL Administrator Popular Post Posted May 24 Over the past year, life has taken on a new, often surreal rhythm. The absence of my mom is a void that has redefined my existence. Each holiday, birthday, and significant event feels incomplete, a stark reminder of the void she left behind. Yet, in these moments of intense longing and sadness, I have also found profound resilience within myself. The strength to stand up from my wheelchair without assistance was a milestone, both physically and emotionally. It symbolized a step towards independence, a victory I wished to share with her. That moment encapsulated the essence of this past year: a series of personal victories overshadowed by the absence of the one person I wanted to share them with the most. Grief, as I have come to understand, is an unpredictable journey. It is like being in the ocean, where the waters can shift from calm to tumultuous without warning. There are days when I feel a semblance of peace, where the memories of my mom bring a gentle smile to my face. Then there are days when the grief is overwhelming, a storm that threatens to engulf me. But just as quickly as it comes, it passes, leaving me to find my footing once more. My support system has been a lifeline through this turbulent sea of emotions. My family, particularly my aunts and uncles, have rallied around me, their support unwavering even as they cope with their own grief. Their love and presence have been a constant source of comfort. My friends have been incredible pillars of strength, reminding me that it’s okay to feel pain, to cry, and to grieve. They’ve lifted me up, ensuring that I never felt alone in this journey. While the pain of my mom’s absence is still ever present, the memories of her continue to be a guiding light. The videos and audios of her voice are treasures I hold close, though I still find it difficult to revisit them. I know that one day, these reminders will bring solace rather than sorrow. As I move forward, I carry with me the lessons and love my mom imparted. Her strength, compassion, and unwavering love are qualities I strive to embody every day. The journey of the nearly broken but not shattered continues, and with each step, I honor her memory by living a life that reflects the values she instilled in me. A lot of you have messaged me and checked on me over the last year and I appreciate that so much. Thank you for extending kindness to me. 61
CandleGuy Posted May 24 Posted May 24 This was beautiful, thanks Ryan. I lost my mom a few years back as well. Grief is bizarre and will come up at times when you least expect it. And then birthdays and anniversaries will pass where you can't conjure a tear if you tried. It's a weird experience, but generally it gets easier over time. But it never goes away, it only changes form. Leaving my favorite clip on grief, from Andrew Garfield - I hope you are able to feel love through grief and I hope your journey gets easier 4
ATRL Moderator feelslikeadream Posted May 25 ATRL Moderator Posted May 25 Lost mine just over a year ago, so I feel you. Sending love and healing
artc0cx Posted May 25 Posted May 25 Sending love and hugs I'm sure she's proud of all your accomplishments
CottageHore Posted May 25 Posted May 25 I'm tearing up ngl. Your post is very well-worded and beautiful. I'm so sorry for your loss. I often think of the day I lose my mother, which we all will one day, and it pains me so deeply. I can not imagine a world without my mother in it. Your post reminds me to be continuously grateful I have my mother in my life. As you said, there will come a day when her loss, while poignant, will hurt a little less and her spirit will comfort you in ways nothing else can. I wish you the best.
Bussea Posted May 25 Posted May 25 I love you, @Ryan I know this isn't easy for you but just know that we all love you and that your mother is and will always be proud of you. You're so strong and I truly wish I could wrap my arms around you right now.
Misty2412 Posted May 25 Posted May 25 Your post is written so beautifully. I am so sorry for your loss. Sending you love and a warm hug 1
Cheers Posted May 25 Posted May 25 This is the one thing in the world I do not think I am prepared for yet... I am not ready for that moment. Sending you lots of love and support! 1
nostalgic Posted May 25 Posted May 25 I'm very sorry for your loss hoping all the best comes along for you.
Illuminati Posted May 25 Posted May 25 That was beautifully written and quite relatable. The first year is the hardest and while there is no set time to finish grieving it will be easier I think she would be proud of your achievements current and future ones. She lives on through your memories or perhaps even looks over you from another place to make sure that you are okay
AvadaKedavra Posted May 26 Posted May 26 (edited) Oh ryan im so sorry Your mom legacy LIVES forever. what a blessing for you and everyone to being able to share time with someone as SPECIAL-GRAND like her One day u will laugh and hug her again we all part ways but we will reconnect. Im a follower of the supernatural since decades ago and there's realities co-existing with this one. Im totally sure she's proud of you. Youre so kind and nice and we all appreciate u so much. She did the greatest job as a mother Her spirit lives forever. Her spirit of goodness and sweetness. Keep walking in life honoring her with happiness in your heart. Dont give up Edited May 26 by AvadaKedavra
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