Jackson Posted March 27 Share Posted March 27 Omg that was totally unexpected! Thank you judges . That's definitely my best score/ranking in a round 1. Also congrats @Rotunda! 9+ scoring songs are rare and doing it on your debut is practically unheard of 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jackson Posted March 27 Share Posted March 27 Here are my lyrics if anyone's interested Paper Wings Untouched beauty, I'm enveloped in your purity So delicate and intricate, emerging in the spring Holy presence, I'm struck by your iridescence You've hardly left your chrysalis, you're just testing your wings You tell me you're ready, my love are you sure? I don't want to taint something so bright and so pure You crawl under bed sheets, I tell you I'm yours I'll hold you more gently than I've held before I'll carefully unfold your paper wings And map each corner of you left uncreased Twist you gently like origami So carefully, fold into me You flutter in my skilled and seasoned hands But still I'm scared you'll crumple in my grasp But if you want my color on your canvas Carefully, fall into me Glints of yellow spread through a mountain meadow Surrender to our footsteps as we skip towards bubbling springs Immersed in pleasure, submerged in natural treasures I'm baptized in your innocence, your love washes me clean You tell me you want this, my love, if I'm honest I know I'm unworthy of your perfect touch I'm fractured and tattered, I've loved and I've shattered But I've never felt the frenzy of your love So I'll carefully unfold your paper wings And map each corner of you left uncreased Twist you gently like origami Carefully, fold into me You flutter in my skilled and seasoned hands But still I'm scared you'll crumple in my grasp But if you want my color on your canvas Carefully, fall into me Fall into my footsteps and I'll match your every move We'll dance until the last ray of sunlight leaves the room Then play our favorite record and crash into the sheets I'll trace your fragile figure as we savor every beat I'll worship every movement until the morning comes Praying for the day I'll be deserving of your love So I'll carefully unfold your paper wings And map each corner of you left uncreased Twist you gently like origami Carefully, fold into me You flutter in my skilled and seasoned hands But still I'm scared you'll crumple in my grasp But if you want my color on your canvas Carefully, fall into me 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prisoner Posted March 27 Share Posted March 27 Thank you judges And yes @Hug @Aurora i can see very well how my entry would fail to satisfy the challenge without any context. It's that i hate butterflies with a passion so i did not want to reference them in any way even though there were many openings for such anyway it was a decision i took and i appreciate the reviews Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ATRL Moderator Legend E Posted March 27 ATRL Moderator Share Posted March 27 Genuinely shocked by this score and by my top 3 placement. Thank you so much to the judges! I was not so pleased with my final result and in my head I was going for something even more emotional. But I can't say I am mad about the score Congrats, Rotunda and Jackson! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kern Posted March 27 Share Posted March 27 not me barely making it to the 2nd tier Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AccioMiley Posted March 27 Share Posted March 27 Thank you judges! A top ten debut aint bad! Haha. Hopefully this next song will be even better and i will take all of your constructive criticisms for this round seriously! Thank you again! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiatus Posted March 27 Share Posted March 27 (edited) Thank you everyone who sent in tracks for this round. I'm sorry that I couldn't post in-depth reviews but here are some ideas of mine that I hope will inspire you: - Feel free to try out all sorts of structures. Such as 2 verses followed by a chorus. This gives you build up to tell your story. - When you have a short chorus (let's say, about 4 lines) and/or the chorus is featured more than twice, it can be fun to switch it up with some alternative rhymes that still fit the main idea of the track. Or switch the point of view between first, second and third person view. - Take inspiration from either: personal events, experiences, emotions. This makes the track you write truly yours and no one else could recreate it art, video games, books, TV shows, movies, any connection you can find, no matter how small, that is able to fit the theme requirement. It can give a very creative spin on your track in the sense of "wow, I didn't even think about that!" and express your individuality. - Make visuals! Artworks, CD concepts, album booklets (I did that in Season 4), these can help make your track more vivid to envision. We all love when our favorite artists provide visuals for the music. And remember this is a game that in addition to lyrics, growth is another main aspect of it. Every step counts. Edited March 27 by Hey Dude 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armani? Posted March 27 Share Posted March 27 Wrote my song for the new round in about 1 hour today with a few tweaks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ATRL Moderator Legend E Posted March 28 ATRL Moderator Share Posted March 28 I have NOTHING for the new round 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OreGuy Posted March 28 Share Posted March 28 Top 10 ohh we need to keep this T10 streak. Let me write this next one. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kern Posted March 28 Share Posted March 28 I hate Easter, it's so random and it's like Christmas from Wish 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ATRL Moderator Legend E Posted March 28 ATRL Moderator Share Posted March 28 yeah...we're submitting tomorrow i fear Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fountain Posted March 28 Share Posted March 28 2 hours ago, Legend E said: yeah...we're submitting tomorrow i fear Cooking another top 3 I know it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prisoner Posted March 28 Share Posted March 28 Haven't started yet. But tomorrow is a holiday so we'll see 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ATRL Moderator Legend E Posted March 28 ATRL Moderator Share Posted March 28 39 minutes ago, fountain said: Cooking another top 3 I know it really doubt it cause all my ideas rn are the quirky mess type and you know how those entries of mine sound like Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aurora Posted March 28 Author Share Posted March 28 15 hours ago, stupidjock said: I hate Easter, it's so random and it's like Christmas from Wish Technically Christmas is the Easter from Wish, since Jesus wasn't actually born on Christmas Day, yet he was crucified and resurrected during Easter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kylie Jenner Posted March 29 Share Posted March 29 Needed an escape from work this week so procrastinated by submitting for this round, I enjoyed it 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ATRL Moderator Legend E Posted March 29 ATRL Moderator Share Posted March 29 maybe we need an extension! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hug Posted March 29 Share Posted March 29 I'll be taking a peek at what has been submitted so far when I wake up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fountain Posted March 29 Share Posted March 29 5 hours ago, Kylie Jenner said: Needed an escape from work this week so procrastinated by submitting for this round, I enjoyed it MCDFTS sequel I hope 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kylie Jenner Posted March 29 Share Posted March 29 2 hours ago, fountain said: MCDFTS sequel I hope Gaga Came Up From The Ground (Easter Anthem) is coming 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kern Posted March 29 Share Posted March 29 11 hours ago, Aurora said: Technically Christmas is the Easter from Wish, since Jesus wasn't actually born on Christmas Day, yet he was crucified and resurrected during Easter. Here it's less days off work, no presents and awkward breakfast instead of dinner Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rotunda Posted March 29 Share Posted March 29 In my one hit wonder era Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weld_E Posted March 29 Share Posted March 29 Just submitted my work. Writer's block was a ***** the round, but I am satisfied with my final submission. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ATRL Moderator Legend E Posted March 30 ATRL Moderator Share Posted March 30 Can I submit it a bit after the deadline? 2 hrs max I hope LE: Managed to submit just 20 mins before the deadline Hope y'all received it cause I am always paranoid about these google forms 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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