Johnny Jacobs Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 (edited) Do yourself a favor and dont do it to yourself.. Falling for your straight friend is the most aching thing you can do. Especially if he's encouraging it. Edited June 5, 2023 by Johnny Jacobs 1
TaggedGalaxy Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 Doesn’t sound like he confessed feelings for you just sounds like all the relationship talk got him in his feelings in general. I wouldn’t read too much into it at this point and probably not worth risking your friendship
ToMmY Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 I can imagine how him saying that felt but just try hard not to let your imagination ruin things. I know this might sound weird but how is his relationship with his family? Maybe he's experiencing non-romantic love for the first time in his life or something like that and that's why he's "confused".
OmegaRidley Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 My « straight » best friend of 5 years used to kiss me on the neck, would hug me all the time (and even whispered « i could stay like this forever » one time). When I confessed to him, he blocked me and told everyone I forced my way onto him… So yeah I wouldn’t say anything until you’re sure there is something
Peroxide Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 Just let things fall into place organically, if something happens... let him make the first move. And whilst his phrasing is certainly... interesting. For now, I wouldn't read too much into it. Just continue being friends... 2 1
Peroxide Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 19 minutes ago, OmegaRidley said: My « straight » best friend of 5 years used to kiss me on the neck, would hug me all the time (and even whispered « i could stay like this forever » one time). When I confessed to him, he blocked me and told everyone I forced my way onto him… So yeah I wouldn’t say anything until you’re sure there is something Oh that's so horrible. I can't imagine how that must have felt...
Bloodflowers. Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 Take his gay virginity away and stay as friends afterwords. Let the move be on him!
Lagerfeld Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 Don't look to bi/bi-curious guys for LT relationships.
dreampop Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 1 hour ago, OmegaRidley said: My « straight » best friend of 5 years used to kiss me on the neck, would hug me all the time (and even whispered « i could stay like this forever » one time). When I confessed to him, he blocked me and told everyone I forced my way onto him… So yeah I wouldn’t say anything until you’re sure there is something Omg that’s so weird why are they like this?????? This post has me questioning everything with this guy i’m dealing with - Act like it never happened. Continue the friendship and let him take the lead on that.
yourcloud Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 (edited) Girl the amount of hetero guys doing this is too much (Even my therapist looked me in the eyes and said being with a man is his scret fantasy.) He either fishes for compliments or tries to console you. Don't ever take the initative especially if you value yourfriendship. Edited June 5, 2023 by yourcloud
MidnightsAtPeace Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 I've been secretly in love with my straight friend since 2019, and I never found the courage to confess my love to him. we are very friendly, we actually act more than just two friends. we flirt ALOT, he calls me "babe", "honey", "my love" and..., we hug almost every time we see each other, some of those hugs even last for minutes, he randomly hugged me from behind the other day and kissed me on the head, he asks me to sit on his lap and so many other things that make me skeptical. BUT the thing is he doesn't know I'm gay, he actually thinks I'm a straight man and I believe I'm his only male friend he treats like that. so idk what to do and I'm totally torn. I don't think I'll ever tell him about my feelings and put our friendship at risk, considering how I'm sure he's just a straight man and
x æ a-xii Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 9 hours ago, Jormungand said: Did you ever catch feelings for them? Did you confess those feelings? Do you still maintain a relationship with them and if so, how do you react to situations where they enter a relationship? I don't think me and my bestfriend will ever be in a relationship or mess around. Really not trying to be delusional about the situation. My biggest fear in all of this is losing him or him doing something he'll regret. He's always been so kind to me and he's been there for many tear filled nights. This scenario happens way too often and most times it's just the hetero guy feeling lonely or bad luck with girls. Plus most times hetero guys fetishize gay people or have curiosity in their minds and once they try you, if you don't match their fantasy in their minds (and that's mostly ruined because of porn), then it's over. If you mess around, chances are you'll lose your friend and he'll regret it or blame it all on you for instigating him. And yeah, as a gay man, sometimes we have crushes on heteros but they'll never change for you or make a difference. You'll feel used afterwards and silly for even trying it.
getBusy Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 9 hours ago, Jormungand said: fights people for fun This sent me 1
NeverReallyOver Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 (edited) 11 hours ago, Jormungand said: "I wish I was into guys, but you do have me feeling some type of way." "I don't know, but you're too precious to me and I love you". He's feeling platonic for you, which in some ways is better than a romantic relationship. Do not ruin the friendship Edited June 5, 2023 by NeverReallyOver 1
Alldeezy Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 Sounds like his bi tbh and is confused with his feelings because his probably doing the whole no im straight and afraid to come out.
KBax Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 I think he just really cares about you and wants to see you happy, idk if he's bi/curious/gay. I've been in situations like this before where it's been questionable, but I don't think he is. I've literally had one of my straights friends try to comfort me by hugging me and kiss me on the head, so I would take things with a grain of salt. 1
imabadkid Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 uh… don’t do it… I have a lot of straight guy friends so unfortunately I’ve been there and straight men will take you on a long disastrous ride that just isn’t worth the headache. men are gonna be men meaning a lot of them are not always rationale and only care about pleasure but aren’t open to accessing their emotions… I will say people don’t realize how many men are curious… I wouldn’t say bi tho but they’re too afraid to pull the trigger.
Jormungand Posted June 5, 2023 Author Posted June 5, 2023 1 hour ago, MidnightsAtPeace said: I've been secretly in love with my straight friend since 2019, and I never found the courage to confess my love to him. we are very friendly, we actually act more than just two friends. we flirt ALOT, he calls me "babe", "honey", "my love" and..., we hug almost every time we see each other, some of those hugs even last for minutes, he randomly hugged me from behind the other day and kissed me on the head, he asks me to sit on his lap and so many other things that make me skeptical. BUT the thing is he doesn't know I'm gay, he actually thinks I'm a straight man and I believe I'm his only male friend he treats like that. so idk what to do and I'm totally torn. I don't think I'll ever tell him about my feelings and put our friendship at risk, considering how I'm sure he's just a straight man and Omg...this is actually how he is with me but he knows I'm gay. I made that very clear when we met...he's always complimenting me but besides all the hugs, he likes to smell around my neck constantly when he goes in for hugs but that's cause I always smell good💀 Like you though, I'm afraid of losing that connection with him and for now I'm going to tell myself he's just a straight guy just being cheeky with his bestfriend😭 1 hour ago, getBusy said: This sent me He will step up to anyone that tries me. I can defend myself, don't get me wrong, but I'm not much of a fighter. He almost got into a fight because some guy called me a f slur when we were hanging out downtown but fortunately the cops intervened.
OmegaRidley Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 4 hours ago, Peroxide said: Oh that's so horrible. I can't imagine how that must have felt... He was also my first love lmao. He had a girlfriend for 3 years behind my back too and I found out afterwards so I was a side chick all that time 3 hours ago, dreampop said: Omg that’s so weird why are they like this?????? This post has me questioning everything with this guy i’m dealing with - Act like it never happened. Continue the friendship and let him take the lead on that. Tbh I think he was a closet case, he used to tell me « I love you » every night, held my hand in the car or while we were watching movies with me laying on his chest, etc etc. Men are such a weird species I can’t deal with them
Bacardo Royale Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 1 hour ago, OmegaRidley said: Tbh I think he was a closet case, he used to tell me « I love you » every night, held my hand in the car or while we were watching movies with me laying on his chest, etc etc. Men are such a weird species I can’t deal with them My straight best friend in college was like this - he used to kiss me on the lips, hold my hand, invite me to his bed to cuddle, he led me on like crazy and I fell for it When I confessed I was in love with him he didn't take it badly at least, he very gently reminded me he was straight and we stayed friends afterwards even though I was devastated for a while.
cockatoo Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 If you like someone you should just tell them. If he's a decent person then he'll let you down gently and it won't be a problem for your friendship. If he gets weirded out and doesn't want to talk to you anymore, then he was never worth it in the first place. Also straight men are often pretty emotionally repressed and might feel more comfortable to be emotional and affectionate around you because they'll feel less judged by a gay man. So they use you as an outlet for the emotional intimacy they crave. It doesn't have to be that he's attracted to you or anything, he just wants someone to hug him and listen to his problems. 1
cockatoo Posted June 5, 2023 Posted June 5, 2023 6 hours ago, yourcloud said: Even my therapist looked me in the eyes and said being with a man is his scret fantasy Excuse me!?
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