Hug Posted November 5, 2020 Posted November 5, 2020 I just figured the judges would be too invested in the mix of their personal lives and the election to do judging
Prisoner Posted November 5, 2020 Posted November 5, 2020 sorry for the delay in reviews everyone. we're all a bit stressed with the election and stuff, i'm sure you know, so results will be coming later. but they're coming. the game isn't over
fountain Posted November 5, 2020 Posted November 5, 2020 1 hour ago, Prisoner said: sorry for the delay in reviews everyone. we're all a bit stressed with the election and stuff, i'm sure you know, so results will be coming later. but they're coming. the game isn't over Thank you for the update
ATRL Moderator Ampersand13 Posted November 5, 2020 ATRL Moderator Posted November 5, 2020 Keeping us in suspense just like Georgia, Nevada, and Pennsylvania
fountain Posted November 6, 2020 Posted November 6, 2020 Here’s the obligatory “how’s everybody doing” daily bump
Hug Posted November 6, 2020 Posted November 6, 2020 I didn't have stanning a Kylie Minogue album on my 2020 bingo card but here we are
fountain Posted November 6, 2020 Posted November 6, 2020 3 minutes ago, Hug said: I didn't have stanning a Kylie Minogue album on my 2020 bingo card but here we are Lucky you because it’s pop album of the year sometimes life gifts us we treats we don’t expect
Hug Posted November 6, 2020 Posted November 6, 2020 2 minutes ago, keshaspearsxo said: Lucky you because it’s pop album of the year sometimes life gifts us we treats we don’t expect Truly, I only listened because I saw other people listening to it and got a lot more than I expected my first Supernova stream was magical tbh!
fountain Posted November 6, 2020 Posted November 6, 2020 33 minutes ago, Hug said: Truly, I only listened because I saw other people listening to it and got a lot more than I expected my first Supernova stream was magical tbh! Are you a Monday Blues stan or anti? Decide carefully, this is a very critical question
Hug Posted November 6, 2020 Posted November 6, 2020 43 minutes ago, keshaspearsxo said: Are you a Monday Blues stan or anti? Decide carefully, this is a very critical question I'm not an anti to any song on the album, but I added all but 4 songs on the album to my Spotify library. Monday Blues was one of them.
fountain Posted November 6, 2020 Posted November 6, 2020 15 minutes ago, Hug said: I'm not an anti to any song on the album, but I added all but 4 songs on the album to my Spotify library. Monday Blues was one of them. Wait... it was one you added, or one you didn't add? Don't let me down Hug
Hug Posted November 6, 2020 Posted November 6, 2020 2 minutes ago, keshaspearsxo said: Wait... it was one you added, or one you didn't add? Don't let me down Hug
fountain Posted November 6, 2020 Posted November 6, 2020 18 minutes ago, Hug said: Nooo not Monday Blues and Say Something my heart shattered
8thPrince Posted November 6, 2020 Posted November 6, 2020 10 hours ago, keshaspearsxo said: Here’s the obligatory “how’s everybody doing” daily bump doing fine
fountain Posted November 6, 2020 Posted November 6, 2020 1 minute ago, 8thPrince said: doing fine Good. Me too. I just had McDonalds. I got nuggets of course. I'm watching The Good Place. That's about as interesting as it gets It's your turn to ask tomorrow
Hug Posted November 6, 2020 Posted November 6, 2020 1 hour ago, keshaspearsxo said: Nooo not Monday Blues and Say Something my heart shattered Well they're still both like...7/7.5 out of 10 songs, I'm just really picky </3
fountain Posted November 6, 2020 Posted November 6, 2020 Just now, Hug said: Well they're still both like...7/7.5 out of 10 songs, I'm just really picky </3 If you saved Monday Blues I'd share my nuggets with you. Monday Blues stans deserve the world
ughgabriel Posted November 7, 2020 Author Posted November 7, 2020 First of all I want to address the obvious and apologize for being so late. I’ve been having a lot of pressure at work since we don’t have a lot of people. And I have to train the new hires so I’ve been working extra time because they need supervision. But I’m honestly hoping that this will cease this following weeks; and if it doesn’t I still promise that I’ll make a space during my commute or on my lunch breaks to get this going. I am so sorry. @Hug - Crimson Water Runs What I loved so much about this song is that it feels really cohesive and focused. I feel like this is a great example of something “being more than the sum of its parts” because the whole ensemble creates a very captivatingly creepy and haunting story. I don’t know how familiar you are with horror movies but I definitely could picture this song as this kind of curse written on a book; some kind of ancient scriptures that hold a malediction. I also believe that your opening couplet is one of your strongest and it really captured my attention. There’s a lot of emotionality in this song as well. Even though its aesthetic is more of a horror song when you see past that, you can also get to comprehend the deeper meaning that it lies within it. Especially on its second verse. I honestly don’t know if this song makes me feel sad or creeped out. Either way, this was another great entry from you and I applaud you for going out of your comfort zone. @firecrotch - Wildfires I was really intrigued by the narrative on this song. I, honestly, have to admit that it took me a few reads to understand what this was about but when I understood the whole story about idealizing, it all clicked. When you think about it, it’s a really dark song given that this person is willing to offer their life just to prove to themselves if this person’s love belongs to them. They would rather die for them than having to live without them. I think I would’ve liked to see you go more in depth with this one. I felt like the word choice was a little simple in this song and if you could’ve been more descriptive or detailed when it comes to the story, it could’ve elevated the song a little more. I know you have said that you like writing short songs but I think that you could’ve benefited from making it a little bit longer. @funnellegs - i’m needy, u need me Not you taking inspiration from the perspective of the people that have hurt you. You really went for that dark side. This is a Gen Z incubus anthem. I like the blunt and unashamedly nature of the song. The way the narrative and perspective is so shallow and, honestly, kind of vile is a bit of a scream. This is a song that the gays would stan for sure (while we’re at it, this also reads like an Ariana song ) Your prechorus is soooo good! I especially loved its second variation with the red/bed lines. I will say that I thought the chorus (the chess section) was the weakest and I didn’t find it to be that good. I wouldn’t call it forgettable but it kind of stands out for not being on par with the rest. Still a very solid entry. @Ampersand13 - Steam (Indifference) I added the “[do?]” on the doc because I think that was the missing word but I’m not sure… I really liked the words choices you made on this song. The stale tasting oxygen and the description of mundane activities was so effective to get your point across. The first couplet of your first chorus? Greatness. One of your best, in my opinion. That is something that I could see a lot of people connecting with and even quoting it. I think I would’ve liked to see another layer of the story on verse 2 because I feel like it’s giving me the same thing you projected on verse 1, but with different words. There were also parts of your bridge that I really liked. For example, the first couplet. But when it reached the “to care is to be alive” part, it gets a little preachy. Which kind of takes away from the authenticity of the emotion. The “tickets to my dying show” line is kind of angsty teen as well but I kind of dig it because of Machine Gun Kelly. Stream Tickets To My Downfall!! This might’ve be perceived as a negative critique but you did good. It’s just that we’re narrowing it down to the top 9 and i have to point out those nitpicks that will help you finesse your work! @Dessy - The Sting Considering that you said you pictured this song as a house song, I really can see the structure of the song being reminiscent of the genre. I honestly loved your approach and the malicious undertone this song had. On one side, it seemed like you were remembering these times with devotion; while on the other, we saw your real intentions. Waiting for the perfect moment to get your revenge. My issue with this song is that it felt like you were leading up to something that never came. I was honestly so interested in knowing what was going to be your revenge, and I was hoping that you’d have a bridge where you’d show us that climax. I honestly would like an extended version of this song. Good job! @Rence - calamity heart I love that you went with water imagery on this song because it’s an essential part of the representation of the leviathan. I honestly loved the narrative in this song. How your first verse works as a little backstory, the second verse represents your current situation and the bridge talks about this clarity. It’s a great example on how you can use your sections to add something new to your song while still being essential to the story. This is a return to form for you! I loved your final chorus and the way the protagonist learns to “embrace the chaos”. We’ve been told that we should hide our bad sides so we tend to forget what we have them and we don’t know what to do with them when they start to reflect on our actions. So I’m glad that you chose to accept it and work on it instead of running from it. Love the closing lines and this would make a beautiful album closer in my opinion. @8thPrince - Your Turn to Die I’m kind of screaming at your title being so similar to one of Hug’s lines nn Okay I wrote that before reading the song. Both of the songs are sooo different. There is something so melancholic about this entry. While most of your songs this season have been more on the realistic side, this one feels a little more inspired by fantasy while still keeping that casual narrative that an 8thPrince song usually has. I think this was a very beautiful and reflective entry; there is something about this song that brings me back to Dashing Penguin (maybe the motherly nature of the song). Your imagery on this song is superb and your word choice was very refined as well. I do have to say that I still don’t know what you were trying to say with the “what will you live with/without…” lines. I’m still trying to decipher your intention behind those lines so if you could clarify that, I’d really appreciate it! @Astronomy - open your eyes / raw I liked the dual sides of this entry and how they kinda worked as counterparts. I definitely liked raw better than open your eyes, because the latter has a lot of repetition and I don’t think it projected the level of depth that I needed to get emotionally connected to it. I think the refrain and the second verse were the best parts of that side. I loved the blunt and raunchiness of raw. I screamed at the climax/imax rhyme. I think I would’ve liked you to go even further and do some clever references or metaphors to add another layer to the songwriting so it didn’t read just as sexual desires. I’m honestly a little lost on how this related to your black zodiac (this won’t affect your ranking, but I would like to know because I think i’m missing something). @keshaspearsxo - T F D EP !!! UHM - THE WAY THIS COMPETITION IS SURPRISE AFTER SURPRISE I honestly loved how you managed to portray what failure is in very different ways but also finding a way to tie all 4 interpretations and creating one entire story with these parts. I definitely see the connection between P and Lw. When I first read P while having in mind that the approach was supposed to be about failure I thought about this idea of whenever the protagonist would reach the pinnacle, they’d find a higher one later and, to me, the idea of failure would lie there; what if I reach a height that is greater than my capabilities? I guess that’s where my mind went when I read the song. While it’s a very optimistic and positive song, I thought it had a dark undertone and that Lw was the true hopeful song. And when I read your inspiration behind your songs, it made sense to me. It’s funny that you said O R is the follow up to O, since I thought of it while reading it. I thought it combined some elements of O with some of S, C. This might’ve had the most thought provoking and cathartic lyrics; maybe it was the unusual structure and your word choice, but there was something that made it feel as if we were reading the core of your mind, the nucleus of your thoughts. While I really enjoy long songs, I don’t have a problem with its length; it’s pretty concise and there’s nothing missing about the story that you were trying to tell with this song. T E U B Y is definitely my favorite one. There is something so magical and grand about it. You managed to incorporate very bold and exuberant elements in your song without making the reader feel overwhelmed by them. There was a really good balance between emotion and lyricism; between clarity and poetry; you just balanced the layers of your song excellently. I loved the concept on this one because it didn’t feel like a preachy let’s change the world type of song but it channels so well what is really going on with our world environment wise. This is just breathtaking. This might be my favorite song of yours along with O.
fountain Posted November 7, 2020 Posted November 7, 2020 Honestly don’t worry about the wait, it’s obvious that I don’t think you would want to make one unless there was a reason behind it, it’s not your fault. The only thing is when there’s no update all we can do is be this rabbit 2 hours ago, ughgabriel said: @keshaspearsxo - T F D EP !!! UHM - THE WAY THIS COMPETITION IS SURPRISE AFTER SURPRISE I honestly loved how you managed to portray what failure is in very different ways but also finding a way to tie all 4 interpretations and creating one entire story with these parts. I definitely see the connection between P and Lw. When I first read P while having in mind that the approach was supposed to be about failure I thought about this idea of whenever the protagonist would reach the pinnacle, they’d find a higher one later and, to me, the idea of failure would lie there; what if I reach a height that is greater than my capabilities? I guess that’s where my mind went when I read the song. While it’s a very optimistic and positive song, I thought it had a dark undertone and that Lw was the true hopeful song. And when I read your inspiration behind your songs, it made sense to me. It’s funny that you said O R is the follow up to O, since I thought of it while reading it. I thought it combined some elements of O with some of S, C. This might’ve had the most thought provoking and cathartic lyrics; maybe it was the unusual structure and your word choice, but there was something that made it feel as if we were reading the core of your mind, the nucleus of your thoughts. While I really enjoy long songs, I don’t have a problem with its length; it’s pretty concise and there’s nothing missing about the story that you were trying to tell with this song. T E U B Y is definitely my favorite one. There is something so magical and grand about it. You managed to incorporate very bold and exuberant elements in your song without making the reader feel overwhelmed by them. There was a really good balance between emotion and lyricism; between clarity and poetry; you just balanced the layers of your song excellently. I loved the concept on this one because it didn’t feel like a preachy let’s change the world type of song but it channels so well what is really going on with our world environment wise. This is just breathtaking. This might be my favorite song of yours along with O. Thank you!! I’m happy you liked the interpretations and felt that they portrayed the theme. It’s interesting, maybe P does have a surprise dark undertone. I’ll say I didn’t necessarily intend for that, or go into writing it thinking of that, but that’s kind of the beauty of writing; that it can mean different things at different times to different people in different places. So I embrace your thoughts wholly. I’m always happy if somebody can interpret my song or get a different take away from it than was my intention. I once submitted a song that was about virginity and somebody thought it was about death. I honestly love seeing stuff like that and never take it as the premise not being clear, but rather that there are multiple layers and potential - it’s always fun. Lw was kind of meant to be a reminder to oneself, like keep going, keep keep going. I know personally that I need reminders and focus like that sometimes. I’m glad you thought of O reading O R, and that you didn’t mind the more poetic structure. I’ve submitted a lot of songs this season and many have been long and had similar structures, which is a form I like to write in a lot, but I also really enjoying writing songs in the vein of O R. And yeah, those are my thoughts, which were pretty good to consolidate into something. I’m really glad you felt the layers of T E U B Y hit. It sounds like it connected perfectly which is really good to hear. It’s kinda hard to know what to say in reply to these reviews sometimes, especially when they’re on the more positive side. But I really pushed myself this round and it’s nice to feel like it was appreciated, at least by one person. So forgive me if I don’t have very interesting stuff to say but I’m very happy reading what you have to say. Thanks again
8thPrince Posted November 7, 2020 Posted November 7, 2020 (edited) 8 hours ago, ughgabriel said: I’m kind of screaming at your title being so similar to one of Hug’s lines nn Okay I wrote that before reading the song. Both of the songs are sooo different. There is something so melancholic about this entry. While most of your songs this season have been more on the realistic side, this one feels a little more inspired by fantasy while still keeping that casual narrative that an 8thPrince song usually has. I think this was a very beautiful and reflective entry; there is something about this song that brings me back to Dashing Penguin (maybe the motherly nature of the song). Your imagery on this song is superb and your word choice was very refined as well. I do have to say that I still don’t know what you were trying to say with the “what will you live with/without…” lines. I’m still trying to decipher your intention behind those lines so if you could clarify that, I’d really appreciate it! For the last lines of each chorus, (and as well as the “my turn to die” lyrics) “what will you live with when it’s your turn to die”, I wanted it to carry a meaning of “if I keep doing these things for you, how are you going to handle it when you’re the one who needs to sacrifice something?” The subject of the song is so unused to compromise, sacrifice, etc. that I equated the difficulty of sacrifice to the feeling of losing an actual body part (an ultimate sacrifice as the body is a huge part of your identity, and it’s literally a sacrifice that can kill you), as they have to make painful decisions for themselves. I think this song is closest to Dashing Penguin voice-wise and thematically as well! and actually Hug’s line inspired the title for mine, it’s also the title of a videogame and I always thought it was a very interesting title Edited November 7, 2020 by 8thPrince
Rence Posted November 7, 2020 Posted November 7, 2020 Thanks gabe Also take your time. We can always wait
Auburn Posted November 7, 2020 Posted November 7, 2020 AUBURN'S REVIEWS Hug - Crimson Water Runs This was simply great. I love it. Especially the verses and the bridge. If you didn’t say it was outside of your comfort zone I never would have been able to tell. firecrotch - Wildfires I think this is very good, and can I also say you’ve improved probably the most out of everyone here from the beginning, but I feel like this pales in comparison to some of your recent entries and also the other very stiff competition this round. The first 2 verses are very strong though. funnellegs - i’m needy, u need me Love that you switched it up for this round! It seems like most people are doing it for this theme lol. The song reads exactly as you intended, and it flows very well. I think for me it’s just missing a little bit of oomph to push it into the front-runner category. Ampersand13 - Steam (Indifference) This feels a bit short for me personally, but what you have is quite good. I really like the bridge you wrote here, but the verses just seem too brief and don’t expand on the theme as much as I would have liked to see. Still a good entry though. Dessy - The Sting (Envy of the Ten Tenacious Sins) Oh wow, this is quite abstract! It was very intriguing to read. I really like the first verse, I think that was your strongest part. The chorus works well for me too. I think I know who it’s about as well… Rence - calamity heart You never really disappoint me. This is great, I don’t have much else to say! 8thPrince - Your Turn to Die This is gorgeous. You were a dark horse in the beginning of this competition but you have become quite a frontrunner imo. Excellent job, I really really adore the first prechorus. Amazing. Astronomy - open your eyes / raw I- I was so caught off guard by this I’m kinda speechless LOL! I definitely think raw is stronger than open your eyes, which is a bit too repetitive in the chorus for me. So I think this entry could have been more slap-it-in-my-face awesome if you only included raw tbh. A risk! keshaspearsxo - T F D EP I won’t be able to remember everything I read so I’m going to instead talk about how this made me feel, which is very important in the art of songwriting. You tell a story here, and I really appreciate that, because I feel like it’s less common in music these days. After ready your entry, I feel a sense of hope, like you can battle all the demons in the world, but at the end of the day, it’s never really over for good. I could be interpreting it wrong, but I really value that mindset, and obviously, you have a way with words, as usual. I will say it IS a bit long for me as regards to one single entry, but I can’t really fault you for that. Spoiler @Hug @firecrotch @funnellegs @Ampersand13 @Dessy @Rence @8thPrince @Astronomy @keshaspearsxo
fountain Posted November 7, 2020 Posted November 7, 2020 5 minutes ago, Auburn said: keshaspearsxo - T F D EP I won’t be able to remember everything I read so I’m going to instead talk about how this made me feel, which is very important in the art of songwriting. You tell a story here, and I really appreciate that, because I feel like it’s less common in music these days. After ready your entry, I feel a sense of hope, like you can battle all the demons in the world, but at the end of the day, it’s never really over for good. I could be interpreting it wrong, but I really value that mindset, and obviously, you have a way with words, as usual. I will say it IS a bit long for me as regards to one single entry, but I can’t really fault you for that. Thank you! There most certainly is a sense of hope Who’s the fallen demon now?
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