discussion Have you ever been in relationship with narcissist?

[CherryBay]

Have you ever been in relationship with person who had narcissistic personality disorder? 
 

[Bartender]

Yeah it ******* sucks but you get to learn about what signs to avoid when seeking a relationship 

[Johnny Jacobs]

no i am not a masochist.

 

i can spot them almost immediately.

[RussianRoulette]

No. 

[Alldeezy]

Yes that bloody emo one I dated in 2019-2020 and the one afterwards was too

 

I haven't dated since because those two put me off men for life 

[Thin White Duke]

Yep, although not an extreme one. It was certainly a problem, but being a bit of a narcissist myself I know how to deal with it.

[Venice B]

Do my parents count? 

 

Edited Wednesday at 01:15 PM by Venice B

[Digitalism]

Most gays are narcicist so we all have 

 

[ArtDeco]

Yes and I'm still coping with the after effects

 

It's not fun at all

[king_queen]

Unfortunately. The only way to leave is to go no contact without warning! At least end the relationship with no explanation.

[Oktober Knight]

Yup. He was the most selfish, judgemental, and mentally abusive person I've ever met. Fk him

[CherryBay]

2 hours ago, king_queen said:

Unfortunately. The only way to leave is to go no contact without warning! At least end the relationship with no explanation.

 

56 minutes ago, Oktober Knight said:

Yup. He was the most selfish, judgemental, and mentally abusive person I've ever met. Fk him

 

2 hours ago, ArtDeco said:

Yes and I'm still coping with the after effects

 

It's not fun at all

 

6 hours ago, Bartender said:

Yeah it ******* sucks but you get to learn about what signs to avoid when seeking a relationship 

Tell me your stories… I am with one myself and trying to figure out what should I do. Any advice?

[king_queen]

1 hour ago, CherryBay said:

 

 

 

Tell me your stories… I am with one myself and trying to figure out what should I do. Any advice?

I'd rather not re-type out my entire experience but my advice really depends on how independent your life is from him. Do y'all live together? How easy can you cut off contact altogether?

[Nova_23]

No but I was best friends with one. They're the worst and make sure you keep them away 

[CherryBay]

6 minutes ago, king_queen said:

I'd rather not re-type out my entire experience but my advice really depends on how independent your life is from him. Do y'all live together? How easy can you cut off contact altogether?

I have a job he doesn't and we live together in rental social housing. I do not depend on him just all this coercive control and years of being abused makes me more than apprehensive to make any moves… he is older than me… 18 years older.

[king_queen]

14 minutes ago, CherryBay said:

I have a job he doesn't and we live together in rental social housing. I do not depend on him just all this coercive control and years of being abused makes me more than apprehensive to make any moves… he is older than me… 18 years older.

I'm so sorry, boo

Do you have anyone in your life you 100% trust?

[CherryBay]

35 minutes ago, king_queen said:

I'm so sorry, boo

Do you have anyone in your life you 100% trust?

Yeah one person…

[katara]

2 hours ago, Nova_23 said:

No but I was best friends with one. They're the worst and make sure you keep them away 

Same. He was my best friend in school but that "friendship" brought not a single good thing. I went sudden no contact the day I graduated school.

 

I guess the only positive thing was that through him I learned to spot narcs so I can avoid them.

[Princess Aurora]

Nah. They turn me off

[bad guy]

Yeah it was my first real relationship in junior year of high school, and we were on-and-off from senior year to my first year in college. If I look back all the signs were there from the moment we started becoming friends but it didn't hit me how insane she was until **** hit the fan and everything blew up. It's a long story but basically she got cheated on, latched herself onto me because my ex-gf is the one who her bf cheated on her with, ended up cheating on me with that same guy, and then created so many lies to try and lure me back. The final time was so beyond ****** up I ended it and threatened to get a restraining order. It was straight out of a TV show honestly. It got so bad that even blocking her wasn't enough so I just purged all my social media. I didn't even make an Instagram or Snapchat again until like 2021  

 

But from what I've been told she ended up losing all her friends and family. Haven't heard anything from her so I'm assuming she found someone else to suck the life out of. Or maybe she got professional help. No idea and don't care 

 

2 hours ago, CherryBay said:

I have a job he doesn't and we live together in rental social housing. I do not depend on him just all this coercive control and years of being abused makes me more than apprehensive to make any moves… he is older than me… 18 years older.

Save as much money as you can, move out, block him on everything, and go no contact. Do everything in silence. There's no reasoning with these kinds of people and you'll end up in a deeper hole.

[Danny789]

From 2007-2020

 

And let me just say I've never been happier for these past 5 years and he's still up in my dm's and text

[Oktober Knight]

5 hours ago, CherryBay said:

I have a job he doesn't and we live together in rental social housing. I do not depend on him just all this coercive control and years of being abused makes me more than apprehensive to make any moves… he is older than me… 18 years older.

I went through a similar situation. He refused to get a job and I worked my ass off to make him happy, sacrificing my credit and. He also refused to cook, clean, or take care of our dogs. I did everything 100% on my own while he yelled at me daily, body shamed me, and degraded me. Eventually after 10 years I found the courage to break it off. The best decision I ever made. 

 

Hopefully you take care of you and do what's best 

[Imagine Dragon]

Yes, and I would say it is one of the most mentally exhausting thing a person can endure.

 

The problem here is that it is rarely noticeable on first sight, and when you are deep into it, it is really hard to end it. Those who have been through it, know.