Whis Posted October 29 Posted October 29 My best friend has severe anxiety problems and OCD. She's been urgently admitted to mental health facilities multiple times. A few weeks ago, we had an argument because I bought crisps and she also bought crisps. All of a sudden, she wanted mine so she proposed to switch our bags of crisps. I didn't like the crisps she got though, so I told her no thanks. She got so mad at me she wanted to leave immediately. Every time we plan to go somewhere, I always drive because she doesn't have a license. I never ask her to pay me. Last week, we organised a movie and tapas night. She's a vegan, I love eating meat. Without even discussing, everything we bought was vegan. I adjusted to her diet without any complains because I know how she can react when I don't agree. When we were at my place preparing everything, she broke my dumpster without telling me. When I asked her where the button to open the bin went, she told me she broke it but that 'it was bad quality anyway'. If I didn't ask about it, she wouldn't have told me about it. It doesn't matter if it's bad quality, I spent money on that stuff. I live alone and work two jobs to be able to have a nice life without worrying too much about money. She lives at home with her parents. The next day, I went to buy a new dumpster (better quality this time) and sent her a pic. She replied 'ok what do you mean? That it was my fault that you had to buy a new one?'. I replied 'well you didn't do it on purpose'. She has been ignoring me for two days now. I just know for certain that she's angry with me because I pointed out something she might've done wrong. I'm starting to dislike that I'm not allowed to say or discuss anything about her, while she gets to point out every 'flaw' in me (for example, she gets very angry with me if I fart when she's near) and she always assumes that everything is okay/self-explanatory from my side. Am I in the wrong and not empathetic enough towards her anxiety? I feel bad but also kind of pissed off. 1
Bussea Posted October 29 Posted October 29 (edited) No. She sounds insufferable and inconsiderate to your feelings. Temper tantrums over chips are one thing, but if you break my **** and don't offer any type of apology AND insult it/me, then you're just being a bad friend. Idgaf if it's low quality or cost a penny. It's ******* mine Your mental illnesses isn't an excuse to be a shitty person because had the shoe been on the other foot you would have no issues in telling me that I was being insensitive towards you. Edited October 29 by Bussea 9
kellebrity98 Posted October 29 Posted October 29 (edited) why people ask things like this on ATRL? gurl put this on Reddit. you should stand up for yourself now imo, being emphatic has it's limits and that is the limit babygirl. try to talk with your friend and tell how you feel about this. if the friend keeps blaming you and doesn't seem to care about you and your feelings then let this friendship go cause it's one sided. Edited October 29 by kellebrity98 1
KillingYourCareer Posted October 29 Posted October 29 NTA. Your so-called best friend is entitled and mentally 5 years old. Send her an invoice with the price of the trash can plus moral damages. 2 1
dumbsparce Posted October 29 Posted October 29 She sounds insufferable and spoiled. Best of luck to you babes
Johnny Jacobs Posted October 29 Posted October 29 (edited) 20 minutes ago, Whis said: A few weeks ago, we had an argument because I bought crisps and she also bought crisps. All of a sudden, she wanted mine so she proposed to switch our bags of crisps. I didn't like the crisps she got though, so I told her no thanks. She got so mad at me she wanted to leave immediately. i didn't have to read any further. girl being rude and entitled idiot isn't an ocd/anxiety symptoms. your friend is just weird and a selfish brat. leaving over chips? dump her in the new dumpster chile. you need a new friend Edited October 29 by Johnny Jacobs
Dear Reader Posted October 29 Posted October 29 You should drop that "friend", to be honest. I can be compassionate and empathic to mental health issues, but if it starts affecting you, you should cut ties. 1
Joyride Posted October 29 Posted October 29 31 minutes ago, Bussea said: No. She sounds insufferable and inconsiderate to your feelings. Temper tantrums over chips are one thing, but if you break my **** and don't offer any type of apology AND insult it/me, then you're just being a bad friend. Idgaf if it's low quality or cost a penny. It's ******* mine Your mental illnesses isn't an excuse to be a shitty person because had the shoe been on the other foot you would have no issues in telling me that I was being insensitive towards you. I know a ***** or two that act like this. don't feel bad, you need to cut them off sadly.
AshleyLovescats887 Posted October 29 Posted October 29 You're not wrong unless you obsess over your coworker for multiple years
Whis Posted October 29 Author Posted October 29 8 minutes ago, AshleyLovescats887 said: You're not wrong unless you obsess over your coworker for multiple years ?
Mupps Posted October 29 Posted October 29 You should spend time with people that give you energy, not drain your energy
tjspy Posted October 29 Posted October 29 Okay, I know why do you need to stop being friends, but now I'm curious if there is any reason why you were friends in the first place.
Whis Posted October 29 Author Posted October 29 5 minutes ago, tjspy said: Okay, I know why do you need to stop being friends, but now I'm curious if there is any reason why you were friends in the first place. We've known each other for many years and have had some amazing memories and laugh all the time.
psychodiva336 Posted October 29 Posted October 29 I think she sounds very immature. Zero accountability, very bratty and entitled. Anxiety and OCD are tough battles to fight, but she's an adult and she should know better than to act like she's a perpetually untouchable victim. I'd say you should have a conversation about this coming from a place of love and concern for your friendship, but I'm not sure how that would go over considering the way you describe any attempts at confronting her... Having many fond memories together is definitely not making the situation any easier, but you should consider this: is there room for more, fonder memories with the way things are currently going?
Chris Posted October 30 Posted October 30 What kind of a "best friend" is this? Dump her ass and move forward in life. You deserve so much better.
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