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What are your favourite Pitchfork reviews?


punisher

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idk i need a kii today

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The way they revisit it left Ajayii shook. 

 

They know they messed up trashing this timeless classic

 

 

 

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None. I try to avoid them.

 

In my head, they're all pretentious nepo-babies who have an elitist perception of their own musical taste. They think they're special because they have a communications degree and "have always had an interest in music."

 

Bítch, that's everyone.

 

This is all while failing to acknowledge that they probably got the job because their uncle works in the finance team.

 

I also feel like they're becoming increasingly redundant in the age of social media, when EVERYONE is voicing their opinions and making video essays on TikTok/YouTube. 
 

Every time I see one, I'm like "and what makes you  the voice of authority on this?"

 

It's made me realise that every review is literally just one person's opinion, and that person probably has no musical talent.

 

Their takes are often contrarian just for the sake of being contrarian. Just because you're the only person to say something is bad doesn't mean your opinion is correct and/or better than everyone's else's.

 

On top of that, half the time the writing itself is sh*t, so they're not even good writers.

 

Also, the lack of consistency just infuriates me. Even recently, Y2K getting higher scores than HMHAS and Eternal Sunshine just made me go, "ok…this exercise is becoming completely pointless and your opinions are totally invalid."

 

Consequently, I don't give them any clicks. I actively want to see them collapse. 


 

Edited by Rihinvention
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6 minutes ago, Rihinvention said:

None. I try to avoid them.

 

In my head, they're all pretentious nepo-babies who have an elitist perception of their own musical taste. They think they're special because they have a communications degree and "have always had an interest in music."

 

Bítch, that's everyone.

 

This is all while failing to acknowledge that they probably got the job because their uncle works in the finance team.

 

I also feel like they're becoming increasingly redundant in the age of social media, when EVERYONE is voicing their opinions and making video essays on TikTok/YouTube. 
 

Every time I see one, I'm like "and what makes you  the voice of authority on this?" It's made me realise that every review is literally just one person's opinion, and that person probably has no musical talent.

 

Also, the lack of consistency just infuriates me. Even recently, Y2K getting higher scores than HMHAS and Eternal Sunshine just makes me go, "ok…your opinions are completely invalid."

 

Consequently, I don't give them any clicks. I actively want to see them collapse. 


 

fff girl :deadbanana4:

 

 

ot: omg i had some good ones but i forgot abotu them tbh :deadbanana4:

 

the moby revies are a kii

 

https://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/5344-play/

https://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/5348-18/

 

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Madonna's had a few doozies that I remember being really funny tbh

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This Sonic Youth review was scathing... A 0.0 and clinical drag.

 

https://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/7342-nyc-ghosts-flowers/

 

Quote

No, I have not forgotten to put the numbers into the rating spaces above. In over two years of writing for Pitchfork, I've waited for the one album that would warrant a 0.0-- perhaps even covet the lesser o.o. In my five years of reading Pitchfork, I can only remember a couple of 0.0s, likely spouting from the scalding keyboard of Jason Josephes. Now, finally, my generation has its Metal Machine Music-- an unfathomable album which will be heard in the squash courts and open mic nights of deepest hell. At least Lou Reed had the good grace to keep his mouth shut on his grinding hallmark of pretentious ejaculation.

Y'all think critics are hard on Pop girls,the best drags and worst scores went to Rock artists. :skull:

Edited by Wicked
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The ones that give high scores to my favorite artists and the ones that give low scores to my least favorite artists 

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1 hour ago, Rihinvention said:

Their takes are often contrarian just for the sake of being contrarian. Just because you're the only person to say something is bad doesn't mean your opinion is correct and/or better than everyone's else's.

this only applied to pitchfork before conde nast bought it and the founders cashed in and retired. modern pitchfork reviews are almost indistinguishable from a guardian review and now just reflect the mainstream opinion; at least they were occasionally interesting back then and had an actual original point of view. paste magazine is probably the only modern day publication that comes close to capturing the old pitchfork spirit, but they're not taste makers and have nowhere near the amount of influence that pitchfork once had on youth culture

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1 minute ago, keerbyriri said:

this only applied to pitchfork before conde nast bought it and the founders cashed in and retired. modern pitchfork reviews are almost indistinguishable from a guardian review and now just reflect the mainstream opinion; at least they were occasionally interesting back then and had an actual original point of view. paste magazine is probably the only modern day publication that comes close to capturing the old pitchfork spirit, but they're not taste makers and have nowhere near the amount of influence that pitchfork once had on youth culture

Oh…that explains the Y2K thing then.

 

I stopped reading them years ago, so I'm not across any structural changes. I try to consumer as little of their content as possibles.


I only see drips of information through TikTok, Twitter and ATRL, and even then, it's usually just scores/ratings.

 

I still hope they burn though. I find constructive criticism so much more interesting to read. Not only because it's nicer, but because it actually shows the reader what the writer thinks the artist should be doing instead.

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Liz Phair's reputational 0.0. To be honest, this record is fun and a pure summer, I gave it 7.8.

Edited by Bends
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"Her pledge to be "ARETHA FRANKLIN FOR THE 2018 GENERATION" is evident, if not quite actualized; this generation's Natasha Bedingfield is maybe more accurate."


this left me wheezing the first time I read it 

 

Lizzo - Cuz I Love You

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that 143 review and accompanying 4.2 score will be one for the books 

 

evil-laugh-the-witch.gif

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Their review for A Fever You Can't Sweat Out is so ruthless lmao

It's a garbage album so the lashings were warranted, but still :skull:

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