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The Tortured Poets Department Review Thread | MC - 76


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5 minutes ago, Edit0rz said:

Swifts new release The tortured poets department is 2024's biggest disappointment and a predictable misstep for the world's biggest artist.  After the critical and commercial success of the utterly mediocre Midnights with its baffling win for AOTY at this year's Grammy it is easily to see why Swift refuses to show any form of artistic growth.  For a woman careening towards middle age she continues to write from the perspective of and market her music to teenage girls, because who else would find this drivel as anything but cringe inducing. 

If Swift could somehow manage to be single for longer than a fortnight perhaps she as a person could mature enough to teach her audience the importance of autonomy. The fact that Taylor is incapable of maintaining a successful romantic relationship should be a clear indicator to fans that she has nothing to offer in romantic advice. My biggest takeaway from subjecting myself to this project is that one cannot be a whole person and be successful in love until they take the time to find inner satisfaction, and clearly Taylor has not taken that time. It is beyond apparent she is emotionally stunted at age 17 and worse teaching her listeners that finding a romantic partner should be their sole purpose. 

Still, the biggest mistake on this album is with its production, it has committed the most cardinal of sins for a pop record, it's mind numbingly boring.  With its mostly indescribable  instrumentation and lack of variation in themes everything here melds into one long mid-tempoed slog.  Highlights: shutting it off. 1/10

Great job :clap3:your style really reminds me of reviews back in 2012 where it consisted of personal attacks aimed towards the pop girls and not much proof that the person actually listened to the album.

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1 hour ago, Burn said:

Why are swiftys trying so hard to make sure that only positive reviews/opinions can be posted here? Like hello it's a review thread, the very purpose is that any and all reviews can and should be discussed. :rip:

Welcome to literally any Metacritic thread for any of the MPG's :deadbanana4:

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7 minutes ago, Edit0rz said:

Swifts new release The tortured poets department is 2024's biggest disappointment and a predictable misstep for the world's biggest artist.  After the critical and commercial success of the utterly mediocre Midnights with its baffling win for AOTY at this year's Grammy it is easily to see why Swift refuses to show any form of artistic growth.  For a woman careening towards middle age she continues to write from the perspective of and market her music to teenage girls, because who else would find this drivel as anything but cringe inducing. 

If Swift could somehow manage to be single for longer than a fortnight perhaps she as a person could mature enough to teach her audience the importance of autonomy. The fact that Taylor is incapable of maintaining a successful romantic relationship should be a clear indicator to fans that she has nothing to offer in romantic advice. My biggest takeaway from subjecting myself to this project is that one cannot be a whole person and be successful in love until they take the time to find inner satisfaction, and clearly Taylor has not taken that time. It is beyond apparent she is emotionally stunted at age 17 and worse teaching her listeners that finding a romantic partner should be their sole purpose. 

Still, the biggest mistake on this album is with its production, it has committed the most cardinal of sins for a pop record, it's mind numbingly boring.  With its mostly indescribable  instrumentation and lack of variation in themes everything here melds into one long mid-tempoed slog.  Highlights: shutting it off. 1/10

I literally cannot imagine being this Mad Online 💀

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2 minutes ago, Redstreak said:

That's what irritated me, it's like he purposefully had to ignore how tongue in cheek a lot of it is. Especially when he had already listened to the album before hand so he could set the tone 💀

Honestly, I just think he's running with the reaction and narrative that he knows will generate clicks. He's intelligent enough to pick up on the fact that that song isn't drop-dead serious, so I have to believe he's intentionally acting as if he thinks it is.

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2 minutes ago, Cruel Summer said:

Honestly, I just think he's running with the reaction and narrative that he knows will generate clicks. He's intelligent enough to pick up on the fact that that song isn't drop-dead serious, so I have to believe he's intentionally acting as if he thinks it is.

"I can't believe the lyrics in this track titled so high school come off as kinda teenager ish"

 

like 💀

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15 minutes ago, Redstreak said:

I'm confused is it the actual review or just a first impressions

idk but it says "review" in the url

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19 minutes ago, Edit0rz said:

Swifts new release The tortured poets department is 2024's biggest disappointment and a predictable misstep for the world's biggest artist.  After the critical and commercial success of the utterly mediocre Midnights with its baffling win for AOTY at this year's Grammy it is easily to see why Swift refuses to show any form of artistic growth.  For a woman careening towards middle age she continues to write from the perspective of and market her music to teenage girls, because who else would find this drivel as anything but cringe inducing. 

If Swift could somehow manage to be single for longer than a fortnight perhaps she as a person could mature enough to teach her audience the importance of autonomy. The fact that Taylor is incapable of maintaining a successful romantic relationship should be a clear indicator to fans that she has nothing to offer in romantic advice. My biggest takeaway from subjecting myself to this project is that one cannot be a whole person and be successful in love until they take the time to find inner satisfaction, and clearly Taylor has not taken that time. It is beyond apparent she is emotionally stunted at age 17 and worse teaching her listeners that finding a romantic partner should be their sole purpose. 

Still, the biggest mistake on this album is with its production, it has committed the most cardinal of sins for a pop record, it's mind numbingly boring.  With its mostly indescribable  instrumentation and lack of variation in themes everything here melds into one long mid-tempoed slog.  Highlights: shutting it off. 1/10

Nurse! :ryan3:

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Maybe loml is the best song on the album? I just can't stop since the morning. It makes me feel that I wanna die and I'm addict.

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apparently nobody can be objective about this album, her strategic mind :rip:

 

its either the worst thing ever w a 36 or the best thing shes ever done and AOTY w 100s

 

this album is very much a 6.5 and nothing more nothing less. its disappointing if you dont like jack and aaron's usual combo of piano and synths, but i feel like the reason its so polarizing is bc its such a neutral middle of the road album. its thrown everyone way tf off djsjgkkf

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36 minutes ago, jjmed59 said:

apparently nobody can be objective about this album, her strategic mind :rip:

 

its either the worst thing ever w a 36 or the best thing shes ever done and AOTY w 100s

 

this album is very much a 6.5 and nothing more nothing less. its disappointing if you dont like jack and aaron's usual combo of piano and synths, but i feel like the reason its so polarizing is bc its such a neutral middle of the road album. its thrown everyone way tf off djsjgkkf

It's just there. It's the first album of here where I haven't connected like at all. Not one song: I pray she abandons this synth Lana Del Rey cosplay sound. 

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3 hours ago, Redstreak said:

"I can't believe the lyrics in this track titled so high school come off as kinda teenager ish"

 

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I love how u pretend like he didnt say this is just symptomatic for many songs on the album

 

:suburban:

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1 minute ago, Kristie Kuwa said:

I love how u pretend like he didnt say this is just symptomatic for many songs on the album

 

:suburban:

I already acknowledged that a lot of his opinions don't make sense because he's smart enough to know what's tongue and cheek and what's not

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14 minutes ago, scot954 said:

Does this count for MC?

Yes. This positive review, 90 from Sputnik, 100 from AS, and an 8.5 have yet to be added.

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15 minutes ago, Johnny said:

Yes. This positive review, 90 from Sputnik, 100 from AS, and an 8.5 have yet to be added.

Idk actually, their last review being shown is from 2021 idgi

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The score will probably end in the high 80s which just proves how the nobody should take reviews of her works seriously. Noway this album deserves more than a 60 average.

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1 hour ago, brazil said:

The score will probably end in the high 80s which just proves how the nobody should take reviews of her works seriously. Noway this album deserves more than a 60 average.

Or maybe it's the 36/100 review that nobody should be taking seriously. Yet people made what? 10 pages circlejerking on it? 

 

Like I completely understand not liking this album. But being so bothered because the general sentiment doesn't reflect your own without questioning that you might simply not get it or that it is not for you (or that you are simply biased by your hatred for Taylor) is weird. I'm not sure why I'm spending my time writing this though because it's not like it will change your or anyone else's mind anyway. 

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"Are all the rave reviews correct? No, it's the bad review that's telling the truth."

 

skinner-out-of-touch.jpg

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16 hours ago, Cloröx said:

This is masterpiece, like Picasso. Some call him bullsh!t meanwhile some refer him as godfather of modern art. TTPD gives me same vibes. It will be talked and discussed for generations. 

Sig worthy :clap3: 

 

OT: The album is a 5/10 in parts and 9/10 in others, but I haven't found an 11/10 in the bunch that can match a Blank Space, for example.

 

I'm gonna go with a 7.5/10 :gaylorcat1:

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5 hours ago, Edit0rz said:

Swifts new release The tortured poets department is 2024's biggest disappointment and a predictable misstep for the world's biggest artist.  After the critical and commercial success of the utterly mediocre Midnights with its baffling win for AOTY at this year's Grammy it is easily to see why Swift refuses to show any form of artistic growth.  For a woman careening towards middle age she continues to write from the perspective of and market her music to teenage girls, because who else would find this drivel as anything but cringe inducing. 

If Swift could somehow manage to be single for longer than a fortnight perhaps she as a person could mature enough to teach her audience the importance of autonomy. The fact that Taylor is incapable of maintaining a successful romantic relationship should be a clear indicator to fans that she has nothing to offer in romantic advice. My biggest takeaway from subjecting myself to this project is that one cannot be a whole person and be successful in love until they take the time to find inner satisfaction, and clearly Taylor has not taken that time. It is beyond apparent she is emotionally stunted at age 17 and worse teaching her listeners that finding a romantic partner should be their sole purpose. 

Still, the biggest mistake on this album is with its production, it has committed the most cardinal of sins for a pop record, it's mind numbingly boring.  With its mostly indescribable  instrumentation and lack of variation in themes everything here melds into one long mid-tempoed slog.  Highlights: shutting it off. 1/10

Imagine having the time and fumes to come in here and write this, nevermind on a WEEKEND :rip: 

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The meltdowns in the Sputnik review are hilarious, what do we think Pitchfork will give her? Their takeaways article seems to points to a positive first impression.

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she's retweeting positive reviews now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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6 minutes ago, kimberly said:

she's retweeting positive reviews now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why doesn't she retweet the Paste review? :coffee:

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