discussion Things in life you learned the hard way?

[BrentB]

What things in life were you given ample warning & signs to take heed of, but you didn't & now you're learning, or have learned, the hard way? Discuss.

 

[KatyPrismSpirit]

Your fav will flop and end up performing with giant turds in las vegas eventually, and that’s okay.

[.Odyssey.]

2 minutes ago, houdini said:

Your fav will flop and end up performing with giant turds in las vegas eventually, and that’s okay.

Madonna hasn’t 

[Gorjesspazze9]

Learn that in the end, the only person you can truly blame for your lifestyle is you. Not your parents, friends, relationships, work environment, or social class. It all starts and ends with your actions and accountability. 

[alexrex]

- You need to work hard for what you want.

- Relationships need work and constancy (including friendships) 

- This world is messed up

- You depend on others (always). You can't survive alone. 

[May]

Never, ever live with a friend if you wish to keep the friendship

[GentleEarthquake]

26 minutes ago, Gorjesspazze9 said:

Learn that in the end, the only person you can truly blame for your lifestyle is you. Not your parents, friends, relationships, work environment, or social class. It all starts and ends with your actions and accountability. 

I have autism, so no 

[Darkgalord]

Humans are evil. 

All of them. 

[Strawberry Bubble]

DON'T follow your passion when deciding to choose a career path. Passion is just one factor in an accumulation of many things to be aware of for your future. 

[Pop Life]

It doesn't matter how hard you try to prove yourself to straight people, they will never accept you. Stop distancing yourself from your queerness. The ones who hate you will always hate you - the least you can do is stop hating yourself.

Edited November 29, 2023 by Pop Life

[Smarticle]

Stop having crushes that will never like me back that way 

[dumbsparce]

No one deserves a 2nd chance and the only people that truly care about you is your blood family (assuming you grew up in a loving family ofc).

Edited November 30, 2023 by dumbsparce

[Oktober Knight]

That staying loyal to someone who abuses you instead of dumping them or fighting back is much easier said than done. Eventually finding that courage can literally save your life. 

[Funnyfatty]

6 hours ago, Pop Life said:

It doesn't matter how hard you try to prove yourself to straight people, they will never accept you. Stop distancing yourself from your queerness. The ones who hate you will always hate you - the least you can do is stop hating yourself.

I just learned that 3 days ago  

 

i’m a very polite and quite person to mostly everyone. People don’t assume i’m gay and i most of the times don’t care. But straight people see me and immediately tells that i’m gay. Most of them act very comforting and i still would never open my mouth because i don’t want to talk about it.

 

1 month ago my boss told me that even though if i don’t say anything that they respect me and accept me no matter what. He also said that he would never allow anyone to talk bad behind my back (saying that he is protective of my sexuality. Ngl i felt kind of safe) 

 

just 3 days ago during a meeting even though i did everything perfectly. I heard my name and my sexuality being the topic. They gave me a motorbike to use and i did. Monday during the meeting he said “you are using my motorbike. What if you have an accident? We won’t be able to clean the **** that will come out of your body. We need more than 1 cotton to fill your hole, maybe even a whole cable” .

 

i was so shocked and so disappointed. Disgusted too. Wtf is he that he can talk all those words towards me? In front of all my colleagues? I left the table. 

 

he assumed i was a bottom even though i’m not. 
even though i was a bottom he doesn’t have the right to say all those disgusting thing s to me infront of so many people.

I realised even though i would be the greatest in the world, they will treat me like sht. I’m a very respectful person and i thought that that was a way to get respect back but i learned it the hard way. No one is going to respect me just because i’m simply gay. 
 

if he fires me tomorrow he can find someone new but i loose myself i don’t think someone will help me out this garbage life. 
 

i changed my life 3 months ago. I moved from the most homophobic country ever to Bangkok. Here is a lgbt friendly space for me. And now i heard the most homophobic things ever that i never heard before.

 
i literally cried that day. 

[Kern]

8 hours ago, Gorjesspazze9 said:

Learn that in the end, the only person you can truly blame for your lifestyle is you. Not your parents, friends, relationships, work environment, or social class. It all starts and ends with your actions and accountability. 

Maybe if you’re rich and white and healthy then you can live whatever lifestyle you want 

Edited November 30, 2023 by stupidjock

[Gorjesspazze9]

8 hours ago, May said:

Never, ever live with a friend if you wish to keep the friendship

This is so real. Everyone I know back in college ended up hating thier roomates after a year  even with my besties I known my whole life. Something is just different living with someone. 

[Gorjesspazze9]

9 minutes ago, stupidjock said:

Maybe if you’re rich and white and healthy then you can live whatever lifestyle you want 

I’m poor, Black, and Mentally ill. But the sentiment still applies for Me. Just my opinion tho. 

Edited November 30, 2023 by Gorjesspazze9

[Asscatchem]

everything stems from how you treat and view yourself

[John Slayne]

the most important and consistent relationship in your life is the one you have with yourself. if you don't like yourself and don't feel secure and confident in who you are, nothing will fill that void inside of you. 

[Julia Fox]

Money is sadly very important in life. Without money you can’t have a house, a cellphone, internet, health, clothes, have water, food and have fun. So no matter what. To survive you are gonna need money and without it you are gonna be excluded from anything. Even social relationships.

 

Also work life is hard as ****. The competitiveness and lack of empathy for anyone will make you hate your job and people would do anything to get you out of their path because that’s how the system work. 

[Bacardo Royale]

I feel like building confidence/ self love should be taught in schools just like English and math is taught from the beginning. Lacking confidence/ being shy/ anxious will lead to not only people taking advantage of you all the time but you also missing out on a lot of opportunities to succeed...

 

Also you can't trust anybody 100% except yourself, if you dont want that info getting out keep it to your damn self...

 

[MasterExpose]

Water isn't a good lube 

[zasderfght]

Dating/Relationship/Hookup Lessons: 

 

-If someone is NOT into your gender, they are NOT into your gender. Any experimenting and/or playing around is just that. You will not convince a straight and/or bi-curious male to "turn" gay. 

 

-A first date is NOT an invitation to overshare your life story. Think about how you're best friends with the closest friend you have now. Did you know this person's family, neighborhood, struggles, achievements, middle name, etc. all on a second meetup? Probably not. Take it slow. 

 

Friendship/Family Lessons: 

 

-Just because someone was your friend in HS, college, or since the sandbox days does NOT mean they will be your friend now. People change. People's lifestyles/wants/needs change. Try not to take it personally. 

 

-I should've put this under "Dating," but do not FORCE yourself to change for a potential friend or date. 

 

ATRL Lessons:

 

-Beware of an ATRL user whose name rhymes with Jaime Coals-- especially if you're white & think Taylor Swift's success was earned. 

[Just a Gay on ATRL]

Be careful who your friends are and who you surround yourself with. Make sure your friends are treating you right - you’ll know in your gut instinctually if they’re not. It’s SO easy to get sucked into their drama if they have a lot of it and for it to change who you are.
 

 I recommend diversifying your friends outside of one core group and having several different groups to fall back on to always remember who you are so you don’t let one group consume your life. It’s good to have a diverse group of friends in your life.

[Sergi91]

*Dont fall for your cute str8 friend. He will NEVER like you like that. 
*Never befriends with coworkers and if you do then don’t share personal information.