base talk Bach stomping on the other main classical girls on Spotify. Why?

[moo]

Johann Sebastian Bach is THE MUSIC. Like he invented it pretty much. Everything before is a total flop. He has more IMPACT than all the main pop girls and boys combined (and he wore wigs). And all arts not charts. This guy was in his Baroque era churning out timeless fugues while all the basic white classical girlies at the time had moved on to stanning Flopzart and the like. But talent won in this case. You think Cruel Summer going #1 after 4 years is impressive? Bach wrote the Brandenburg Concertos, shipped the sheets off to some random noble with no taste who never had them performed, then they sat and collected dust for like 100 years before they were found. And it's been #1 on the Hot Classical 100 for 200 years since.

 

He is the king of remixes though. Have you heard Switched On Bach? It SLAPS. Bop after bop.

 

(Unfortunately this album is literally impossible to find on streaming, because the producer Wendy Carlos is, presumably, a reclusive Luddite who aggressively keeps her **** off digital platforms. Sad! But this **** was all the rage back in the 60s. It's a shame because 21st century gays need to hear this synth-pop classical masterpiece.)

 

Also Bach was a total stud and had like 13 kids or something, some of which became minor classical rockstars themselves. Old classical music joke: Bach's organ had no stops.

 

Total LEGEND. Has had us all gagged for 300 years. Bachmania will never let up.

[Kelp]

 

3 minutes ago, moo said:

He has more IMPACT than all the main pop girls and boys combined (and he wore wigs)

His wigs were crusty, dry, and hardfronts. Debussy wore lacefronts only

 

5 minutes ago, moo said:

Also Bach was a total stud and had like 13 kids or something, some of which became minor classical rockstars themselves. Old classical music joke: Bach's organ had no stops.

 

Being the Nick Cannon of the 12th century or whatever is not something to be proud of

 

2 minutes ago, moo said:

Has had us all gagged for 300 years

From the stench yeah

 

[Breakdown]

well he's baroque not classical

[Odette Violet]

 

Ik my girlies did the right thing for sampling his music

 

 

[Life Savers]

Bach is the blueprint. The other main classical girls can't compete. 

[John Slayne]

Bach ended those irrelevant flops with ease 

[Cheers]

Streaming farms. Nothing about this wig wearing ***** is authentic.

[JennyWayne]

He only has that many streams because he keeps spamming releases on Spotify. He has released 75 albums and a whopping 1139 tracks according to Kworb. Truly the Taylor Swift of his time 

 

[moo]

42 minutes ago, ATRL Username said:

 

His wigs were crusty, dry, and hardfronts. Debussy wore lacefronts only

 

Being the Nick Cannon of the 12th century or whatever is not something to be proud of

 

From the stench yeah

 

FADbussy, whom I've never listened to besides Clair de whatever, so I can say with authority he wouldn't know a beat if a metronome hit him in his impressionism, couldn't dance, wore NO wigs, was allergic to serving wearing the same dusty 19th suit every time he was caught on a Daguerreotype, and Bach outsold and has a higher Metacritic score. Hope that helps sweetie

[TheLastChord]

Industry plant, we all know he kept ghost composers in his dungeon... Along with actual ghosts.

[Domination]

Tchaikovsky out-talented all these other girls with ease, tbqfh, but Bach deserves the #1 spot. I’m just glad we can all agree (and the GP does too hihi) that Mozart isn’t doing iT.

[Zaynsus]

He has more classics but Moonlight Sonata is better than everything he's ever done

 

[shookspeare]

1 minute ago, Zaynsus said:

He has more classics but Moonlight Sonata is better than everything he's ever done

 

embarrassing, moonlight sonata is literally the classical equivalent of Don't Stop Believin

 

delete your account

 

[VeniceBeach]

MARINA 10.3m

TikTok payola is not enough to dethrone the Venus Fly Trap composer

[supaspaz]

Tchaikovsky kinda flopping! I guess he’s a seasonal girlie. “Nutcracker” is for the casuals.

[Kelp]

1 hour ago, Breakdown said:

well he's baroque not classical

Bach was at his lowest - fat, nasty, and baroque

[moo]

37 minutes ago, Zaynsus said:

He has more classics but Moonlight Sonata is better than everything he's ever done

 

No, but the 3rd movement goes HARD. Even classical girlies didn't know how to pick opening tracks.

[on the line]

Beethoven's Sixth Symphony, particularly the 3rd movement, takes the cake for me. Or Chopin's Raindrops prelude. 

 

 

[Kelp]

58 minutes ago, moo said:

FADbussy, whom I've never listened to besides Clair de whatever, so I can say with authority he wouldn't know a beat if a metronome hit him in his impressionism, couldn't dance, wore NO wigs, was allergic to serving wearing the same dusty 19th suit every time he was caught on a Daguerreotype, and Bach outsold and has a higher Metacritic score. Hope that helps sweetie

You THINK he wasn't wearing wigs because the lace was unclockable idk what to tell you...

[Alex21kw]

I'm actually surprised that Beethoven isn't number 1, he feels more mainstream with chart-topping hits such as Fur Elise and Moonlight Sonata.

 

But Bach is like the Beatles, influenced everything after him.

 

Chopin should be 3rd

[HASHTAGPOW]

Bach has bots 

[Funhouse]

Mozart composed the most frequently performed opera of all time and people all over the world spend good money to see it live. Touring power >>> quick little singles 

[chiliam]

ATRL, never change

[Zack]

It's because he stans Red Velvet

 

 

[moo]

28 minutes ago, Funhouse said:

Mozart composed the most frequently performed opera of all time and people all over the world spend good money to see it live. Touring power >>> quick little singles 

Bach is by far the most performed classical composer the world over. Mozart was could put on a show, but he's the classical equivalent of the meat dress compared to Bach. Study up dearie: