discussion Do you think there's a leering/ogling problem among gays?

[Damien M]

7 hours ago, Vespertine said:

YES. I mean, it's all men of course, especially straight men to women, but I wish gays were more evolved.

 

This is going to sound really stupid (), but I never used to be able to see super sharply at a distance because I hated wearing contacts or glasses. I got my vision corrected with laser eye surgery recently, and now I actually notice how thirstily and blatantly gays stare, and I don't like it at all   Before I used to think my (female) friends were crazy when they swore they noticed guys blatantly checking me out, but now I see it. It's one thing at the bar or the club, but when I'm just walking down the street to pick up my morning coffee, you don't need to act like it's a ******* meat market. 

 

And since the OP mentioned bi guys, not to be ~biphobic~, but I've been shocked by the number of guys I've noticed doing this (to me or other guys) while literally walking arm-in-arm with their girlfriends. Have some shame and decency, boys. 

THIS is the real pandemic lol. I see it ALL the time. What is going on?

[WEEKND]

That never bothered me but I’m aware that I’m a big tall man so stuff like that doesn’t make me feel unsafe. Others might feel differently about it and that’s ok 

[zasderfght]

Yes and no. I feel like straight men have a way bigger issue at ogling women than gay guys ogling straight men. That being said, I have been hit on while at work and in class, and it is really annoying and uncomfortable. Some people just want to focus on their studies or their work. Not everyone wants to be hit on while doing these things. 

[Dante Silva]

I don’t mind. I usually take it as flattery. On a few occasions I’ve had guys introduce themselves on Grindr by saying they are masturbating to my profile pics. I usually just respond with ‘Enjoy x’.

 

However there was one occasion a few years ago when I was in my local gay bar and there was a guy standing at the bar, looking directly at me and he had his hand down his trousers clearly playing with himself and I thought that was a little blatant and un-classy.

Especially when he later attempted to follow me into a toilet cubicle an hour later and I literally had to force the door shut to keep him out.
 

At the back of my mind, when I’m out on the town, half of me views being on the gay scene as a potential networking opportunity and I wouldn’t want to alienate someone who might be in a position to help my career (and ultimately improve my salary) by instead adopting a politically correct attitude.

 

Whilst I would never instigate such sloppy behaviour myself, I just accept that the presence of testosterone in a man’s body can sometimes make him so aroused that he just can’t help himself and as a bottom, it can sometimes be flattering to be on the receiving end of such behaviour.

 

 

[BrentB]

On 11/2/2023 at 1:05 AM, Damien M said:

THIS is the real pandemic lol. I see it ALL the time. What is going on?

I don't know bruh. It's pretty much been like since the pandemic ended lol. I've been noticing a lot of incubus/succubus energy going around in people. Now there's a subset of women (older woman especially) doing the ogling now. It's getting weird 

 

And NOT some of y'all echoing the same-ass sentiments that catcalling creeps say when they're called out. "Smile MA, You should be happy I approached you. You're just so beautiful, I'm just complimenting you 

 

Edited November 3, 2023 by BrentB

[DeadInside]

I feel ugly now, guys don't oogle at me in public . 

[Bacardo Royale]

I stare but only when they're not looking

[AvadaKedavra]

Im ugly i dont have that problem. Is heaven. It must suck to have people  lookin at you weirdly 

[Bears01]

On 11/1/2023 at 5:08 PM, Goaty said:

Yes BUT I enjoy the stares. 

Pics so I can stare away plz 

[Infatuation_Junkie]

Yes, it’s called being a man. 

[Maroonx]

Yesssss. The looks from guys in clubs that could almost cut your soul was unsettling... Going to clubs and having guys touch me was super annoying. One time this Irish dude thought it would be ok to shove his tongue down my throat... Like just because you were drunk and I was tipsy and we were both dancing next to each other, it does not make it ok for you to do that... UGHHH, if only he was cute too, but he wasn't hahahahah

[imabadkid]

Men in general can be v aggressive when it comes to finding someone attractive. The other day a guy in a huge pickup truck almost ran into the stop sign because he was doing a double take looking at me when I guess flattering but it’s just like… ok… 

 

also a lot of str8 guys at the gym stare… I’m not sure if they’re attracted, interested or just.. staring? Probably somewhere in the middle. It only annoys me when someone comes up to me (which yes some guys have done at the gym which is like rule number one of what NOT to do). 

[kataraqueen]

On 11/1/2023 at 11:23 PM, Antikythera said:

Where I am from, Brazil, our away of flirt is looking kind insisting. While I was living in Europe I would do it in a very predatory way when somewhere where people are open to date, like clubs.

 

I found out this turn on people, a lot! A lot of men love to be "hunted".

 

I know this is not politically correct,  but it was my reality.

 

I wouldnt say a word and already be kissing.

 

This is hot to me and like a said NO ONE EVER had a negative reaction.

 

Maybe I choose well or I can read people well and I always do that to people who love it.

 

I dont care if someone is looking, even if im not attracted, depending on the situation I want them to watch more lol

 

But I also know how to say "hey, nothing against u, but i dont feel a connection".

 

Now there are people who wont take no for an answer and can be very heavy and then I also know how to say "**** OFF!" and make the person physically leave me alone. Problem is some love that too.

 

Im very goofy and always end up being funny. If someone watches me that much, I would invite them to see what I got and even touch it, so they can move on. 

 

In a gym I wouldnt do it because my life cant be a porn movie. Here the gyms are known for guys having sex there is a bunch of leaked videos out there.

 

In a club ok, or even cruising, I think u can be kinda predatory in the gay world, in the sense of looking right inside a strangers eyes till he feels horny.

hi am shy boi across room pls no stare am rly shy 🫣

[glitch]

Personally, I don't like to be perceived in public. When I notice someone staring at me my immediate thought is there's something on my face or I look weird that day  It's actually so unnerving when you notice someone's staring at you and you meet eyes with them and they continue doing it. Like at least look away now you've been caught wtf 

 

I don't really stare at other people. I sometimes take a quick glance or double take if I think someone is hot but that's about it.

[Bussea]

it’s weird. i hate being stared at and had so many older gay men do that **** to me as if they’ve never seen a man before and it makes me want to cuss them out  just speak to me so I can reject you and you can leave me ALONE