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Are you happy ? Why is life so hard ?


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Posted (edited)

I'm in my late 20s and I tried to stay positive all my life but the fact is that life is always cruel and sad.

 

Everything always ends badly.  All relationships fade eventually.  All our loved ones, our family, will die one day or another.  Telling myself that one day I will be alone, that my entire family will no longer be here, terrifies me.

Life is so fragile.  This anxiety which tires our body, this depression which does not get better.  This feeling of shame of not being enough.

 

Those moments when people ask you “how are you” and you automatically answer “yes and you” but inside you're destroyed.

This feeling of being a monster because all my schooling I was told that I was ugly and weird.  And these words stay forever in my head. These people who leave without warning, illness, seeing my parents get older and have health problems.

 

Being gay and being rejected by the world, the fear of going to hell for that, the fear of never seeing my parents again.  Things always end up getting worse.  I don't know happiness but only anxiety, sadness and permanent fear.

 

The addictions that ruin your life and make you feel ashamed.  The sex that disgusts you after the act, that feeling of being dirty.  Never have good news.  Everything is so dark.  The world is so violent.

 

Are you happy ? Do you think life is beautiful ? 

 

Edited by MoonGoodandHappy
  • Like 1

Posted

Yes cause Cruel Summer is going #1 so I can ignore everything negative in my life:jonny6:

  • Haha 2
Posted

I don't fear of going to hell for being gay. Hell as you know it is an abrahamic concept. I believe in God but I don't believe in abrahamic religions or care about them and in my religion you're not going to hell for being gay or whatever.

 

I like life. I don't cling to it. I believe that the soul is eternal and I believe in reincarnation. I don't like the current state of the world. The hate, the wars, low morals (rise of fascism, overconsumption etc) but my personal life is okay. 

Posted (edited)

My mom was diagnosed with cancer in 2020 and has a couple more years to live and you know why I’m able to be happy? 
 

Because mentally I had to make a decision… Was I going to let “fleeting life moments” make my life worse or was I going to find appreciation in the life that I have left? 
 

And I chose to appreciate life. Life isn’t perfect for not ONE person on this planet. There’s good and bad in everything.


Choosing to view it in thru a bad lense you’ll waste a lot of time being unhappy…

Edited by CristianGarcia
  • Like 1
Posted

I may be a minority here, but I am happy 

Posted

The good news is you can control how you view life, even if it doesn't feel like it. Most of what you call life happens inside your head - there's an external event and then a HUGE monologue from the voice inside your head about it. The voice usually takes up far more space than the event itself. The first step I think is realising that you're not a passive bystander to whom life happens, but can actually control your perspective. if you think that life is bad, then you will find evidence of that all around you; same thing if you think that life is good.

 

So take what you said for instance, and shift the perspective.

 

"All relationships fade eventually." The relationships existed, which taught you lessons and made you grow as a person.

 

 "All our loved ones, our family, will die one day or another." Death happens so that there can be new life. We are all standing on the shoulders of hundreds of thousands of years of ancestors, who were here, loved, and died. Cherish the life you have. You are alive now. Now is the envy of all of the dead.

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  • Thanks 1
Posted

I like life but I don’t like current society, if that makes sense? Or like the way I have to spend my life. Like I love nature and my friends and being expressive and being creative, but I don’t like 99% of jobs out there that you have to dedicate such big amounts of time to to stay alive 

  • Like 1
Posted
4 minutes ago, Capris Groove said:

The good news is you can control how you view life, even if it doesn't feel like it. Most of what you call life happens inside your head - there's an external event and then a HUGE monologue from the voice inside your head about it. The voice usually takes up far more space than the event itself. The first step I think is realising that you're not a passive bystander to whom life happens, but can actually control your perspective. if you think that life is bad, then you will find evidence of that all around you; same thing if you think that life is good.

 

So take what you said for instance, and shift the perspective.

 

"All relationships fade eventually." The relationships existed, which taught you lessons and made you grow as a person.

 

 "All our loved ones, our family, will die one day or another." Death happens so that there can be new life. We are all standing on the shoulders of hundreds of thousands of years of ancestors, who were here, loved, and died. Cherish the life you have. You are alive now. Now is the envy of all of the dead.

bih! Im on prednisone not me wanting to cry now. I hate mood changing side effects :cries:

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)

Same bestie, I'm slowly but surely giving up on the concept of relationships because they ALWAYS end sourly, at least from experience, not to mention that I cannot seem to make friends

 

Bleak but #sololife is my last remaining hope:

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Edited by theoghon
Posted

Life happens as life happens, it doesn't promise anything. The good, the bad, and all that is in between will happen and that is the order of things. Closing your eyes in denial or in toxic positivity to negative things happening around you or burying yourself so deep in your misery and melancholy that you cannot see all the positive things in life are not healthy mechanisms to deal with life. With life comes death, with beginnings comes end, and vice versa. When something ends, it leaves an opening for a new beginning, a new feeling, a new relationship. Losing things, people, dreams, etc is just part of life. It teaches you how to mourn, it teaches you the depths of sorrow, love and your soul. I love how Freud explains mourning; you cultivate love for a person or an object and when that person/object leaves your life, you do not know what to do with all that love. Cherish the fact that you are filled with so much love. Don't be afraid to feel the love inside you, it will guide you to sweeter horizons. Don't be afraid to feel your sorrow, don't shy away from emotions marked as "ugly" by the "productivity society". All we have is life and all we feel is emotions. It is okay to experience them, the only way out of them is through them. The pressure to "being happy" is a false god, happiness is another emotion, not a state of mind. Choose gratitude, choose life. These are better means of state of mind to strive for.

 

Life is going to happen, whether you like it or not. It's best if you accept it sooner. 

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)
56 minutes ago, Capris Groove said:

The good news is you can control how you view life, even if it doesn't feel like it. Most of what you call life happens inside your head - there's an external event and then a HUGE monologue from the voice inside your head about it. The voice usually takes up far more space than the event itself. The first step I think is realising that you're not a passive bystander to whom life happens, but can actually control your perspective. if you think that life is bad, then you will find evidence of that all around you; same thing if you think that life is good.

 

So take what you said for instance, and shift the perspective.

 

"All relationships fade eventually." The relationships existed, which taught you lessons and made you grow as a person.

 

 "All our loved ones, our family, will die one day or another." Death happens so that there can be new life. We are all standing on the shoulders of hundreds of thousands of years of ancestors, who were here, loved, and died. Cherish the life you have. You are alive now. Now is the envy of all of the dead.

:clap3:inspirational. 

 

Yeah but Im 90% of the time negative just like OP. And it happens inside my head but I have mental issues so I cant control what I think and feel. Im trying tho.

 

People around me say that I should be happy due to what I have now, but I still feel like Im not enough.

Edited by duybeeGAshantiGA
Posted

listen to subliminals and develop a delusional self concept, it works 

Posted (edited)

I believe the ancient Greeks (and later Lana) said happiness is a constant process rather than a static feeling and I think this is very true. I think life is both beautiful and ugly and we just need to hold on to those moments that make it worthwhile whilst trying to survive the rest. 

Edited by Robert
Posted
1 hour ago, theoghon said:

Same bestie, I'm slowly but surely giving up on the concept of relationships because they ALWAYS end sourly, at least from experience, not to mention that I cannot seem to make friends

 

Bleak but #sololife is my last remaining hope:

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I think there is a great value in being alone and spending time with yourself, but this sounds extreme. There are good people out there, and true friendships exist. So do long-term relationships. Perhaps it's time to go to therapy and discuss why you feel like giving up on all social life because you've been burned in the past.

Posted

I was getting my **** together over the summer but I feel like I'm back in the hole where I started :thing:

Posted

meh. 

 

i live a good life, i have a loving family, upper middle class, loving friends, i’m fairly attractive, etc. but for some reason i’m still not contended

 

i’m very ungrateful and i hate that about myself 

 

  • Like 1
Posted

Practice semen retention and join a church. :heart:

 

 

Posted

I'm grateful with what the universe has given to me tbh, yes ofc i wish some stuff was different for me but i got my degree, working on my masters now, have a fun job, loving parents, nice friends i talk to everyday. I cant complain. Also always get uplifted by listening to music , which is so basic to say but its real. music is probably one of the top things in life that makes me happy, i couldnt imagine a life without it.

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