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swifties make me hate taylor so much more than i actually do ya'll really don't know flavour

Swifties are religiously convinced that TTPD is Taylor's magnum opus and a collection of exquisitely high grade poetry. And that the only reason the album got panned and receives constant negative attention on ATRL is because she's super successful and people are hating on her out of jealousy. We keep having heated debates about the neverending variants greed, but I think we should spend more time unpicking the actual quality of this record. So here's a collection of undeniably terrible lyrics from this album that should raise anyone's eyebrows, especially coming from a supposed "songwriter of this generation". This is no way an exhaustive list of bad TTPD lyrics, so feel free to suggest any other lines that I may have missed and I'll add them to the OP. 1. And so I was out of the oven and into the microwave - This is from the prologue. She's referring to her relationship with Joe as the oven and with Matty as a microwave. It's not hard to understand what she is trying to say here, but it's terrible on every single level. 2. We declared Charlie Puth should be a bigger artist - terrible line and simply doesn't work even if we pretend they declared that while they were high 3. I scratch your head, you fall asleep like a tattooed golden retriever - same reason as the above 4. But you told Lucy you'd kill yourself if I ever leave, and I had said that to Jack about you, so I felt seen - Lana does this name dropping very well, but with Taylor this line sounds simply jarring and confusing (possibly because we know who Jack is in this instance) 5. At dinner, you take my ring off my middle finger, and put it on the one people put wedding rings on - an absolutely diabolical way of saying "ring finger" 6. Did you really beam me up in a cloud of sparkling dust just to do experiments on? - awful cosmos metaphors all over this song 7. Now I'm down bad, cryin' at the gym - already a bad line on the surface of it, but once you realise what "down bad" slang actually means it makes it even worse coming from someone of Taylor's age 8. Fʌck it if I can't have him, Cause fʌck it I was in love. So fʌck you if I can't have us - swearing just for the sake of swearing. Sounds really jarring 9. Sanctimoniously performing soliloquies - when thesaurus is your best friend 10. So I leap from the gallows and I levitate down your street - I get the witchery imagery, but the gallows? Really? Nothing ever in her career came close to being this threatening to be able to draw this analogy 11. "Who's afraid of little old me?" You should be - A really bad one, but she really took cosplaying this line seriously with weekly variant threats in attempts to block yet another more popular album of the week by scamming her way to the top 12. You wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me - like really? Your childhood/career were that bad that an average person wouldn't survive an hour in your place? 13. And you deserve prison, but you won't get time - implying that someone deserves prison for breaking up with her. This has to be the worst line on the entire album 14. He jokes that it's heroin, but this time with an "E" - making fun of someone's drug addiction is never cool 15. We would pick a decade / We wished we could live in instead of this / I'd say the 1830s but without all the racists - no, just no. Simply doesn't work in any context even if she's eventually realises that she wouldn't be happy in that decade either. 16. You know how to ball, I know Aristotle - really bizarre way of saying she knows philosophy 17. Brand new, full throttle, touch me while your bros play Grand Theft Auto - suddenly Spelling is Fun doesn't sound so bad 18. Everyone knows that my mother is a saintly woman, but she used to say she wished that you were dead - no explanation needed (i hope) 19. In the age of him, she wished she was thirty, and made coffee every morning in a Frеnch press. Afterwards, she only atе kids' cereal - Taylor, what is this??? This sounds so odd and jarring on every level 20. Even statues crumble if they're made to wait - Statues eventually crumble. They aren't made to wait either - they don't have a choice. This doesn't make sense on any level even if she refers to herself as a patient statue. 21. Stopped trying to drill the safe - referring to trying to get through to Joe All of those + the absolute lyrical disasters that are My Boy, Down Bad and So Long London - all three songs are stuffed with metaphors to the brim just for the sake of finding thematic metaphors - worst kind of writing. What Swifties don't understand is that the writing on this album pales in comparison with Folklore and Evermore and Red etc, and this was supposed to be her grand poetic adventure. With so many lyrical missteps this album can only be described as "mid" at best, and don't get me started on the production.....

https://www.standard.co.uk/comment/taylor-swift-eras-tour-hegemony-social-media-music-madonna-b1163540.html

Her words are like Chinese water torture

Taylor will try to block her from #10 now

did they count the Twitter likes?

They answered their own question. She's the final form of a capitalistic music industry that only exists to push variants. No artistry, no point of view, no courage. Just variants. If she didn't already exist, they would have to invent her.

And Vermeer's paintings are a lot more natural than Picasso's, but people can look for different things in their art. "Authenticity" isn't the only valuable quality.

I don't care what anyone says. For an album with minimal promo, no visuals beforehand, and multiple delays, no one expected great numbers. But she carved out a unique sound with top-tier material, stellar production, and fantastic songs. She exceeded everyone's expectations, showcasing her artistry with attention to melodies, sultry vocals, and incredible ad-libs. This is undoubtedly one of the best releases of 2024, regardless of what you miserable twinks on ATRL say. This is a win for both Mani and Nation. I hope the numbers improve, but she'll be fine in the long run. This is just the beginning for her, and unlike some ex-girl group members and recording artists alike, this won't be her peak.

Taylor Swift's following is just a cult at this point. I agree with everything in the article. I actually googled "what is the appeal with.." the other day and google finished my sentence with her name.

How many variants did Whitney release?

Watch out Tinashe… here comes @Normani:

charli is a quality over quantity person as she should be

No, I'm not demented. I listen to the superior OG versions. She's got enough money and doesn't needs the extra from the TVs. Besides, what was supposed to be about reclaiming her art and ownership, turned into a half a decade long money grabbing operation. If owning her masters was the main concern she would have dropped all of them by now. Instead she's milking the re-recordings for petty cash with multiple variants.

Because Renaissance is the better album. Hope this helps!

Omg this is why her haters are so dumb. They can't comprehend the simplest metaphor.... This about the industry, not about her childhood home.... Jesus...

Madonna, Prince, Janet, David Bowie, Beyoncé, Lady Gaga. All massive popstars. Pop doesn't have to mean artless and juvenile. It's just that audiences have become so dumbed down and complacent they actually want the same content warmed over and served back to them over and over because it's not challenging or confrontational. She literally sells her old albums back to them in multiple variants, that's how low the standard is. Literally a capitalism wet dream.

You missed "touch me while your bros play Grand Theft Auto"

And I'm supposed to believe that is the talent and songwriter of a generation? No ma'am.

My boyfriend who is also a GP member keeps telling me that the album isn't coming until 2025 every time I bring it up He knows I use ATRL and if I'm ever writing a paragraph on my phone he always says, "Are you fighting with the gays, again?"

the swifties pulling up:

Like I've said many times: Taylor's writing style is young adult fiction. It's had that quality since the start of the career, and all these albums later, it seems like it's here to stay. Maybe you love it, maybe you don't. I liked some of her stuff, but I got bored of her real quick. She's a competent songwriter, but an incredibly dull one incapable of challenging the listener. Madonna's discography has far more dimension, but to be charitable, we can't pretend she didn't give us Killers Who Are Partying and Funana.

Real talk though, at least she released something. I think it's better than keeping the fans starved and waiting forever.

Girl, Taylor would block Rihanna with streaming alone

It's depressing how black excellence is being replaced by white nonsense.

She's gonna tweet "I don't know I don't understand because we don't have that context where I come from " for the 10th time. Black and white dog tea.

Not them thinking high school lyrics at 35 and friendship bracelets are artistry

Some of you have such a limited idea of what music can be, it's crazy. ZERO flavour.

"What artistry?" and it's the best song oat ijbol

Can't wait for more of this. WWIII CONFIRMED

As opposed to touch me while your bros play GTA?

so cringe when she does this... good songwriting is not about knowing the biggest words lmao

Can we drop the Camila versus Normani war? Like if you must do that then realize I LUV it literally did more on its first day then this whole album, and it's already at 80 million streams so clearly Normani is a bigger worry but just be grateful she got her album out and put a 3 year old song on it that hasn't even scratched 200 million streams to ensure there's minimal numbers there…

this is some kind of reading comprehension i would expect from 5 year old kid, not adult person

Y'all are so weird when it comes to Normani

Remember all those "records" BTS broke that nobody even knows or talks about? Right.

Taylor is masterful at gaslighting her fanbase. They think it's a lyrical masterpiece just because she named the album "Poet Department".

I don't even like Taylor but this person sounds miserable. Calling people "intellectually challenged" because of the music they listen to is is based in nothing but pretention. We also have options of what to like and dislike. We don't all have to listen to Taylor Swift if we want to. Alternative music still exists in 2024, even if the author isn't listening to it.

I feel so bad for him, honestly. Imagine going through a breakup, having your depression revealed by your toxic ex, and being cyberbullied on the internet. That must be traumatic. Taylor is yet again spinning the narrative and trying to act like she was cheated on by Joe when, in reality, she was the cheater. Imagine your ex breaking up with you and then, a few weeks later, dating another man. Proof of Taylor being an unreliable narrator. Taylor needs to handle the breakup maturely and stop acting like a professional victim. She could call out her toxic fan base. In fact, many people in the industry have done that, from Ariana to even her bestie Selena G., calling out fans who harass others. And just to note, Joe has been outspoken in the liberation of Palestine while Taylor has remained silent and has even supported Israel on occasions.

By other ATRLers logic Brat having variants and bonus tracks just means she has demand because nobody's forced to listen/buy them

The lyricism in question: "tattooed golden retriever" "I'm having his baby, no I'm not"

Literally none of these are bad enough in the actual context of each song to make a thread about it. #18 in particular seems weird to call out because it very effectively illustrates that the subject of the line was trying to be significantly more mature than she really was and, when the relationship ended, had to come to terms with the fact that she was essentially still a kid (this is from the Manuscript, which isn't limited to Matty/Joe, and the line almost certainly is about dating John Mayer, who was much older than her). #17, #14, and #1 are on here basically because they were immediately seized upon by detractors at release, but not because you have anything new to say about them. #6 and #7 are literally just fine, normal lyrics. #5 seems extremely straightforward - aliens with a light Star Trek reference ("beam me up"). Every line there from Who's Afraid furthers the very obvious hyperbole that underlies the whole song. Like I just don't get what we're doing plucking individual lines out of their context to parade them around and pretend they're terrible, or in the case of some posts in this thread, pretend they're evidence that she's secretly actually a bad songwriter.

It was "too Euro-pop" for Europe too

The amount of braindead takes that I've seen coming for Charli's music is hilarious, and I'm 1000% sure most of them only consider Taylor (and her minions) good music. It's sad. It's even worse when you take into consderation the fact that Sympathy Is A Knife is not even a diss track/shady song. If anything, it's a very good topic and I wish more pop girls addressed it. Many of them also have this very narrow idea of what lyricism should be (thesaurus ramblings) when Charli has quite excellent/vulnerable lyrics too, just hidden in her fun, heavy, and experimental production. And that contrast is one of the best thing about her artistry. Not saying that you have to like her music, but there's a difference between "it's not my cup of tea" and...this.

Nothing to celebrate. It speaks to a frightening level of transphobia among a certain segment of the population.

1. There is artistic value to "oontz-oontz". The 00s and 10s EDM wave gave us some real stinkers, but it also gave us plenty of innovative tracks. 2. The gay community has always been a major contributor to the evolution of dance music (see: disco and house music), so I'm not sure how "gay" constitutes as a drag. Sounds like internalized homophobia to me. 3. If you can't tell the difference between songs like 365 or Track 10 and, say, your generic mid-10s David Guetta track, there's nothing we can do for you.

excuse you