discussion Is it a preference or self hate? Black gay only wants white & Latino men!

[SmittenCake]

 

 

 

thoughts ?

 

 

 

 

[tost1]

I'm sure there's a valid psychological explanation for it but, sadly, I'm not a psychologist 

[BionicWooHoo]

That's so sad lmao. 

[SmittenCake]

11 minutes ago, tost1 said:

I'm sure there's a valid psychological explanation for it but, sadly, I'm not a psychologist 

Steve lacey said he couldn't see himself w a black man because they're basically family or something or whatever lmao so hmm maybe it is psychological 

[sugarysunflower]

The irony that he rationalises his choice to not date other men of the same ethnic background is because they all have trauma. 

[Loca]

A preference that's built from self-hate that was systematically enforced on him, so, both. 

[dumbsparce]

There's no way he didn't say that for clicks. He said he's horny af and gets rejected a lot so what better way for him to find a man than a good old stunt for exposure? Which is sad in itself bc he's very good looking.

Edited January 2 by dumbsparce

[ArtDeco]

Probably trauma related. I can empathise on the whole getting hate on Grindr because racism on gay dating / hook up apps is so so real and awful. The guy is talking out of delusion tho and probably clout chasing atp.

[Trent W]

I don't understand why people get online and say these things

 

If you have a preference keep it to yourself 

[Devin]

in the black community there's diff levels.

 

depending on the person and their dating history could be a result of colorism, internalized racism, trauma, or even fetishizing. 

[Rotunda]

If your preference doesn't prefer you, you have three choices: 

 

1. Change yourself

2. Change your preferences 

3. Get over it 

 

You don't get to hold the men you date/sleep with to certain standards and then get upset when they reject you because you don't meet those same standards. 
 

We can and should talk about how prejudice helps form our preferences and beauty standards, but if your stance on the topic is just rooted in your wish for hot guys to **** you, you just feel entitled to men's bodies.

Edited January 2 by Rotunda

[Domination]

It feels like whenever I meet someone who complains a lot about getting rejected on apps I'll sympathize with them for a minute before they inevitably start talking about their own preferences which are always rooted in prejudice or fetishization  

[Onyxmage]

Self hate is so annoying.

 

[ArtDeco]

11 minutes ago, Rotunda said:

If your preference doesn't prefer you, you have three choices: 

 

1. Change yourself

2. Change your preferences 

3. Get over it 

 

You don't get to hold the men you date/sleep with to certain standards and then get upset when they reject you because you don't meet those same standards. 
 

We can and should talk about how prejudice helps form our preferences and beauty standards, but if your stance on the topic is just rooted in your wish for hot guys to **** you, you just feel entitled to men's bodies.

Girl if only it was that easy.. You can't just change yourself or preferences if that's what you're psychologically into.

 

There's a lot more psychological stuff to why people are attracted to what they like and it could even stem down to porn addiction or abuse.

 

I think it's more about finding spaces that are more welcoming and catered to what someone is looking for, rather than blaming it on themselves and having to change themselves too.

[Rotunda]

Just now, ArtDeco said:

Girl if only it was that easy.. You can't just change yourself or preferences if that's what you're psychologically into.

 

There's a lot more psychological stuff to why people are attracted to what they like and it could even stem down to porn addiction or abuse.

 

I think it's more about finding spaces that are more welcoming and catered to what someone is looking for, rather than blaming it on themselves and having to change themselves too.

I don't think it's easy to do any of these things, but it's an inevitability. 
 

If you can't or don't want to change yourself or your preferences, you have to make peace with the fact that your dating pool is what it is. That can include finding spaces that maximize your odds, but at the end of the day, nobody is going to move mountains just so you can find a partner.

[SimpleKindofLife]

You can see how much the self hatred has ruined his psyche

[KingJay]

I Mean idk. I see a lot of black men that say "I only date other black men" or Latinos saying that they only date Latinos. What does that mean?

[-brian]

I have no patience for this topic anymore

 

Bc there is no solution, nobody has to be attracted to you, lower your standards or get the **** over it omg. Just a bunch of cry babies virtue signaling 

 

And this man is nuts, calling others ugly and admitting to racial preferences 

 

Stop seeking validation from how many hot men tap you on Grindr 

[Gov Hooka]

Let's leave - trying to turn getting rejected by white muscle gays (especially cuz some of y'all heauxs exclusively thirst after them and y'all know damn well who you are) into a pointless, narrative on "sexual racism" -behind in 2024, mkay. 
 

 

Edited January 2 by Gov Hooka

[Katamari]

I'm confused

 

is he famous? Why is he making a video like this and posting it on social media like we care  

ppl share way too much on the internet for no reason  

[teresaguidice]

12 minutes ago, Katamari said:

Why is he making a video like this and posting it on social media like we care  

ragebait to farm engagement or degenerative brain disease

[#Beautiful]

big yikes 

[Colmillo]

Self hatred definitely, if you really love yourself and think you're hot why wouldn't you find other people from the same race also hot? 

[Minto]

i'm sorry but how are you not getting attention on sniffies? even anon profiles get messages on that cesspool of an app 

 

Edited January 2 by Minto

[Rogue_Redux]

It's def self hate