Oktober Knight Posted January 30 Posted January 30 I've been with my husband for 9 years and we just recently became open in summer 2022, mainly because he loves young twinks, plus he's extremely vanilla and I'm overly kinky which I had to supress all my life and couldn't truly explore my wild side. One of my kinks is daddy/boi role playing (more on that in a minute). The open relationship was surprisingly going well; we set rules and stayed within our boundaries and it actually elevated our sex life with each other. This past September, we had a younger bear from Grindr come over to hang out with us - we mainly chatted over mimosas and chilled outside. The boi made the move and the 3 of us ended up having sex that night. We stayed in contact and he ended up coming over every weekend and started spending the night. It was supposed to be a boi toy situation since he was kinky like me and I took over as being his "daddy." One thing naturally lead to another and the 3 of us started having feelings for each other. After many long talks about the situation, we decided to just continue with the way things are going and let things unfold naturally. Several months later, our boi has been introduced to some of our family members and our friends whom were all accepting of our relationship. He comes over often and we have a good balance of all spending time with one another, even separately. Without even requesting, we all stopped hooking up with others and became monogamous which I actually prefer as I have no need to sleep with others when I have the best of both worlds with my two beautiful men (I get my dominant daddy hubby and then my wild kinky pig boi, so my sex life is ultra satisfied). I have days where I question if this is the right thing to do but he brings so much light and comfort to our home, which is something we needed cause 2023 was a very dark place for the 3 of us. He pays his own way, has a job, contributes to groceries and whatnot, so this seems genuine. Not to mention he's the sweetest and most caring person. Thoughts? Concerns? I know a lot of you will think this is messy and I'm ready for the judgmental comments lol 10 6 9
May Posted January 30 Posted January 30 i think if it feels right then go for it i would personally have concerns for if one of the other men fell out of love with me/got bored with me, however still had feelings for each other... or even on the other side of the coin, what if ur partner gets bored of ur new boy and wants u both to distance yourselves, but you dont want to? it's 1 of those things where if it goes well then it'll go really well, but if it goes even an inch wrong then it's gonna go reallllly wrong i think ur in too deep rn to even cut it off prematurely, you'll both always hold a bit of resentment for the person who cut it off before it fully ran it's course 3 1
Makibro Posted January 30 Posted January 30 If you're comfortable with it and dynamics remain positive between all parties, I don't see why it shouldn't work. If at any point you feel unsure, having a conversation with your partners could put any anxiety at ease, as well as strengthen bonds given that you're being vulnerable with them. 1
Dear Reader Posted January 30 Posted January 30 If it feels right, keep going. It sounds like you three have a great relationship with each other and that’s amazing. My only advice is to never stop communicating your feelings and if anything bothers you. I really really hope everything goes well for you three 1
Uncatena Posted January 30 Posted January 30 you seem to have an open, ongoing conversation about it and letting this go naturally is a good idea imo. happy for you, enjoy 1
Bosque Posted January 30 Posted January 30 18 minutes ago, Oktober Knight said: Several months later, our boi has been introduced to some of our family members and our friends whom were all accepting of our relationship. He comes over often and we have a good balance of all spending time with one another, even separately. Without even requesting, we all stopped hooking up with others and became monogamous which I actually prefer as I have no need to sleep with others when I have the best of both worlds with my two beautiful men (I get my dominant daddy hubby and then my wild kinky pig boi, so my sex life is ultra satisfied). 2
Twilish Posted January 30 Posted January 30 Sounds like it could be potentially messy if even one of you starts feeling differently but that’s life. We are only on this earth once so if this is what feels right then just go for it. I think you and your hubby should also just keep your own part of the relationship to yourselves as I’m assuming if anything goes awry you want to have each other to fall back on and make sure any boundaries or feelings are discussed openly so nothing is misconstrued etc. 3
Dante Silva Posted January 30 Posted January 30 Someone always ends up being phased out of these situations, even if it takes a few years. Then again some enjoy playing with fire until one partner gets burned. 14 2 4
Terrielle Posted January 30 Posted January 30 Came here to make a dumb joke but honestly that's kinda cute lol. I've recently come to believe in polyamory because I started developing feelings for 2 guys at once last year... If you can do it, then props to you and I wish you all the luck in the world 1
alexrex Posted January 30 Posted January 30 As long as it's all consented and everyone is satisfied, I don't see a problem with it. 2 1
theweekend Posted January 30 Posted January 30 be happy. and I'm happy it's working out for you, guys! keep it going and be honest/open about the situation/rules I really think it will continue to work out! 1
brooklyndaddy Posted January 30 Posted January 30 You do you but may I ask why you are spelling it “boi”? Is this some special term different than the correct spelling?
Bethenny Frankel Posted January 30 Posted January 30 this is not going to end well, but good for you 5 3
getBusy Posted January 30 Posted January 30 For a second i thought this was gonna end up having some sort of mention of Android chat bubbles 💀 Glad itms not that type of thread. Girl if y’all are happy that’s all you should care about 1 2
TheWalkOfShame Posted January 30 Posted January 30 I can get your anxiety and feeling it might be a weird situation but right now it feels good and right so enjoy that. and you seem to be very reflective person and open to talk about upcoming issues so I wouldn’t be too worried happy for you guys <3 2
Redstreak Posted January 30 Posted January 30 I’m glad it works for you but I love my picket fence husband kid and dog life 1
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