discussion Your definition of fwb?

[Gesamtkunstwerk]

I've noticed the "friends with benefits" term means something different to each person, or maybe even have changed meaning some point in time.

 

It's usually either:

1) friends with benefits: you hang out, cuddle, go out on dates, help each other out, text at least a couple times a week, have sex but it's not a given when hanging out, can be exclusive but not necessarily, basically a relationship without label

or

2) "friends" with benefits: Only text to set up a hook up, sex is a given when hanging out, not involved in each other life besides getting off, exclusivity is definitely not assumed unless stated otherwise, basically a booty call

 

So ATRL, how do you define that term ? 

[Sheep]

My definition of fwb is bad idea 

[glitch]

Number 1 sounds like the straight definition and number 2 is for gays. 

[DamianSolo]

Number two—a glorified hookup that's still quite empty, but called "friends with benefits" in an attempt to give it substance.

[Dragonfly]

personally my definition is Furries Wearing Bikini's

[yonsé]

i think the definition is the grey area between a platonic relationship and a romantic relationship.

[SlowGinFizzzz]

In my opinion, the term "friends with benefits" presupposes the existence of a friendship, with the ~benefits~ being an addition on top of that. So definitely closer to the first definition. 

 

Second definition is literally just a hookup that happens more often than just once (so one level above a one-night stand). 

Edited January 9 by SlowGinFizzzz

[Vespertine]

1 hour ago, glitch said:

Number 1 sounds like the straight definition and number 2 is for gays. 

Agree with this, but I also think people are being harsh on #2 in here. I’ve known guys like this before where we’d eventually end up chatting after, and maybe grab a bite to eat or watch a movie etc. I wouldn’t say we were “hanging out” on a regular basis without a hookup first, but it doesn’t have to be totally distant. 

[feelslikeadream]

I guess this is a worthwhile distinction, though I don't see why it matters much to anyone outside of the "relationship."

 

It's interesting to me because of a recent experience. I have someone who falls into the 2nd category and we were hooking up recently and I referred to him as my FWB and he was like, "Wait, are we friends?"  And I was like, "Well, idk, we do talk for a few minutes before and after hooking up, so we're at least friendly..." And he was like, "Yeah, but that's not the same as actual friends, so I'm more of a regular hookup than a FWB..." I opened my mouth to continue the argument but he stuffed it with something so I stopped debating and continued my work as a good suck pig.

[Breathe On Moi]

1 hour ago, glitch said:

Number 1 sounds like the straight definition and number 2 is for gays. 

this sums it up

 

and I’d even add the number 2 is a bit too generous, there’s literally no hanging out, or even texting to check in, and it totally makes sense to the top. 

[AMIT]

3 minutes ago, feelslikeadream said:

I guess this is a worthwhile distinction, though I don't see why it matters much to anyone outside of the "relationship."

 

It's interesting to me because of a recent experience. I have someone who falls into the 2nd category and we were hooking up recently and I referred to him as my FWB and he was like, "Wait, are we friends?"  And I was like, "Well, idk, we do talk for a few minutes before and after hooking up, so we're at least friendly..." And he was like, "Yeah, but that's not the same as actual friends, so I'm more of a regular hookup than a FWB..." I opened my mouth to continue the argument but he stuffed it with something so I stopped debating and continued my work as a good suck pig.

the last part caught me off guard but work it I guess 

[KillingYourCareer]

I don't really like the idea but for a short time last summer I had a friend with benefits. It was this bisexual guy no one knew about. He had a fetish for blue-eyed blondes like many Italians so it was easy for me and he always said that if he had been into anal then we would've become boyfriends, but I was fine not doing anal and I think he just kept saying it out of horniness. I'd go to his house, we'd do our stuff and then we'd talk, and we also texted a lot about anything, so it really was a friendship. But then I started looking for something serious so I thought it was pointless to keep in touch with him as he clearly said I made him too horny to be just friends without benefits, and I wasn't sentimentally attracted to someone I couldn't have to begin with. Either way, it's doable as long as you don't develop feelings.

[ScorpiosGroove]

just someone you **** regularly and can hit up whenever you’re horny 

[John Slayne]

1 hour ago, Vespertine said:

Agree with this, but I also think people are being harsh on #2 in here. I’ve known guys like this before where we’d eventually end up chatting after, and maybe grab a bite to eat or watch a movie etc. I wouldn’t say we were “hanging out” on a regular basis without a hookup first, but it doesn’t have to be totally distant. 

this. you can still be friendly and cool with your regular hookup, even if you're not besties.

[Newt]

1 is friends with benefits. 2 is **** buddies

 

I feel like the order of the words places emphasis on the type of dynamic 

[Devin]

1 is the true defintion.

2 is a sneaky link or f*ck buddy lol.

[Hephaestus]

19 hours ago, Newt said:

1 is friends with benefits. 2 is **** buddies

 

I feel like the order of the words places emphasis on the type of dynamic 

This 

[Alldeezy]

I just see it as a guy wants to use and treat me like **** and use me for sex then throw my ass away till somebody better comes along

I got my ex still messaging me saying "gimme head" and I keep telling him no but he thinks im joking

 

 

fwb and asexuals don't mix well

[Donquizote]

Regular sex buddy. That's it.