Just a Gay on ATRL Posted January 12 Share Posted January 12 On 1/4/2024 at 3:04 PM, LoveInStereo said: I’ve been in a monogamous relationship for 2 years. I think social media’s conditioned ppl to become painfully egocentric & navigate dating (& most of life) through a lens of “how does x fit into my life plan/self concept without challenging my comfort?” without realizing real love is gonna radically shift your focus & change your worldview. If you’re not giving out what you’d want to receive, you’re not ready to be in a mature relationship All of this comment spilled, bolded part especially. Ppl love to be the victim & not see how they’re complicit in their own misfortune Wow your first paragraph was so true and I never knew how to verbalize it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dante Silva Posted January 13 Share Posted January 13 As a drag queen I attract a lot of crazy but I also attract guys considered to be in Grindr’s upper echelons and from all walks of life. I say this not to boast but because it’s such a hedonistic experience for me that I have to block ordinary guys so I can curate my chat list with top shelf *****. The only regular guys I ever keep in my chat list are serving police officers so I can easily access addresses behind car license plates if I feel a car has been parked outside my place too long. I am always nice and careful never to be passive aggressive or ghost anyone, it’s simply not right to lower someone’s self esteem simply because you don’t fancy them. It’s only when they keep trying that I feel justified in blocking and that can be anywhere between 20 - 50 times per day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gesamtkunstwerk Posted January 13 Share Posted January 13 I think because of social media, people want a perfect life, including relationship, but are scared of the inevitable rejection that comes along with actively dating + We're so busy with our work, education and personal life that it's hard to find time to seek out a relationship and be heartbroken over something that didn't work out. So many people go into a bunch of low effort hook ups, but are secretly hoping that just one of them will materialise into a relationship. It's the mentality that you can't seek out and put time into a relation with other people, you just kinda have to stumble upon someone that likes you and discard them if they don't fit 100% into your life. If you don't give, you don't get, simple as that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bosque Posted January 13 Share Posted January 13 I don't hook up and don't use Grindr so I feel very comfortable judging all the gay men who participate in a hookup culture that is increasingly devoid of morality. All my friends who (rightfully) complain about being ghosted or treated badly have also ghosted other guys and treated them badly when it was convenient for them, so I don't feel at all bad for calling them out on their hypocrisy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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