discussion I'm tired being that friend

[Queen.]

I always have some friends or family member asking me for money. I have a problem with that because they never ask someone in their circle close to them for money. The only time they speak to me when they are wanting something. They have a problem with asking their close friends for money but with me they don't have a problem with it. Why is that?

 

I'm well taking care of and pay my bills on time. But I just don't want people to text me or call me asking me to borrow some money. 

[magazine]

Tell them you're broke 

 

/end thread

[Devin]

I’m in the same position which is why I’m not so close with most my fam. 

[Kern]

You borrowed them once and now they think you’re filthy rich and will always give. Just make up some excuses until they start to read between the lines and realize they shouldn’t ask you anymore. People always want stuff for free, any source is good for ‘em 

[Cain]

Tell them no

[Happylittlepunk]

Just simply say you don’t have money to let them borrow. I never let people borrow money of mine unless it’s something serious. 

but yeah the easiest thing is just to pretend your broke or have very little that way people will stop bothering you. 

[PMKARDASHIAN]

I had a couple family members reach out for money and I’ve tried to help them out, then it became almost an every day thing and I just stopped replying/answering their calls texts and cashapp requests. They got the hint eventually 

[Domination]

I’m right there with you. That and people asking me hang out but inadvertently wanting me to drive them somewhere.

[Queen.]

7 minutes ago, the70s said:

You borrowed them once and now they think you’re filthy rich and will always give. Just make up some excuses until they start to read between the lines and realize they shouldn’t ask you anymore. People always want stuff for free, any source is good for ‘em 

I lend it if I have it which I do because I save my money and I have a side business along with my full-time job. I don't mind letting friends/family borrowing money but when you have to ask me every month it's become annoying. And then she will get mad when I say no or I don't have it. 

[Queen.]

7 minutes ago, PMKARDASHIAN said:

I had a couple family members reach out for money and I’ve tried to help them out, then it became almost an every day thing and I just stopped replying/answering their calls texts and cashapp requests. They got the hint eventually 

I'm going to try this...hopefully she will stop asking me for money. 

[LCTV]

Tell them to get their ass up and work - Kim K style.

[wish]

Tell them it's not a good time for you financially & then ignore if they continue to ask you in the future

[Big Bad Wolf]

9 minutes ago, Queen. said:

I'm going to try this...hopefully she will stop asking me for money. 

I’ve had this same problem i.e friends asking me for money. You just have to be straight up with them lol. They’re not beating around the bush when they want to run your pockets so don’t give them any grace. Tell them frankly you are not their parent or their man and you have your own bills and expenses and aren’t looking to supplement anyone else’s. Purrr. I cut off a couple friends for this. Don’t look back. They clearly don’t value you. Unless they’re facing homeless (and even then it’s circumstantial….) don’t give them a dime and tell them to **** off. 

Edited August 16, 2023 by Big Bad Wolf

[Katamari]

get a restraining order and sue them for damages and emotional distress to earn your coin back

 

 

 

Edited August 16, 2023 by Katamari

[DemDam92]

Once you give, the requests never end.

 

once you stop, they start complaining and talk bad about you. But they never remember how often you have helped them in the past.

 

normal thing in our society, just ignore the requests and don’t give shhhht

[Attitude]

block them

[Asscatchem]

51 minutes ago, Queen. said:

And then she will get mad when I say no or I don't have it. 

let them get mad

you have to ask yourself if this relationship is serving you enough for you to continually lend them money

[Bosque]

1 hour ago, Queen. said:

I always have some friends or family member asking me for money. I have a problem with that because they never ask someone in their circle close to them for money. The only time they speak to me when they are wanting something. They have a problem with asking their close friends for money but with me they don't have a problem with it. Why is that?

 

I'm well taking care of and pay my bills on time. But I just don't want people to text me or call me asking me to borrow some money. 

Probably because you give it to them

[bad guy]

Just start lying about how much money you have. Especially in this economy it’ll be believable

 

 

 

[Lloyd Minaj]

This used to happen to me quite frequently but with only one friend. She would always ask to borrow money from me and would never pay me back without me having to chase it up. I eventually just started saying that I didn’t have it whenever she would ask, which later lead to her complaining to a mutual friend about it as I “always have money” according to her. Safe to say, we don’t speak anymore.

[John Slayne]

just decline. it's good to be kind to your friends and family but if you feel like it's draining you you shouldn't do it. at the end of the day you're employed full-time and times are hard, you are responsible for nobody but yourself. 

[DamianSolo]

I used to be "that friend," until I stopped giving money and whatever else they asked for. If you don't set a boundary people will use you and use you... and use you, without a second thought or care. They don't even ask me anymore, and our friendship is still as good as it ever was.

 

And you don't even have to be rude about it. Just tell them, "I'm budgeting and trying to maintain control of my finances, I'm sorry—but I am unable to give you any money."

[Archetype]

Just say no, it’s your money and you don’t owe them an explanation nor do they deserve one after everything you’ve given to them.  A real friend would understand they’ve crossed boundaries, and dump everyone else who doesn’t get it.  Their problems are not yours, and don’t let them try to make it your problem. 

Edited August 17, 2023 by Archetype

[50thStateofMind]

 

Quote

They have a problem with asking their close friends for money but with me they don't have a problem with it. Why is that?

Because they don't consider you a close friend.

[Alldeezy]

Me but with lifts etc.  then when I told them no, they hit the block button and call me an unreliable friend