Saintlor Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 7 minutes ago, LoveInStereo said: Coming out as gay late in life is the guilt free midlife crisis these days, huh? Leave your wife for your female secretary, society says you can rot in a hole. Leave your wife for a femboy, you’re a hero for unlearning systemic heteronormativity. It’s such a con. Selfishness is selfishness, don’t make vows you have no intention of keeping This is absolutely not true It's way more hated to be gay (and be married to a woman) than to be a cheat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
san784 Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 (edited) 12 minutes ago, Zox said: 21 years ago was the year 2002… even popular democrats like Obama didn’t support gay marriage homophobia is very much still a thing today, let alone two decades ago. You don’t know what their situation was. I didn’t watch the video so I don’t know the whole story or their particular circumstances but if the man knew he was gay before they married and didn’t tell her, then decided to come out after all these years then he is extremely selfish and disgusting. There is absolutely nothing that you can say that will make what he did ok. Edited April 22, 2023 by san784 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redstreak Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 (edited) 4 minutes ago, san784 said: I didn’t watch the video so I don’t know the whole story or their particular circumstances but if the man knew he was gay before they married and didn’t tell her, then decided to come out after all these years then he is extremely selfish and disgusting. There is absolutely nothing that you can say that will make what he did ok. Where were you born? Some of us had parents saying being gay was the worst thing that could happen to them, pastors that pushed people into marriages that could “cure them”, murders and people saying they deserved it for existing. I really have to wonder what’s going on with some in here thinking 20 years ago was some gay utopia. Literally today we have kids getting kidnapped from their parents for being queer Edited April 22, 2023 by Redstreak Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zox Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 3 minutes ago, san784 said: I didn’t watch the video so I don’t know the whole story or their particular circumstances but if the man knew he was gay before they married and didn’t tell her, then decided to come out after all these years then he is extremely selfish and disgusting. There is absolutely nothing that you can say that will make what he did ok. Or.. what if he was bi? What if he wasn’t sure because they got married young as most people did back then and thus he never got to experience/fully know? You do realize this situation isn’t ideal for him either, right? Lol. I doubt he wanted to stay in an “unhappy” marriage for that long. He probably went through waves of emotions feeling it was worth it to suppress his feelings to stay with his lover and to save their marriage. This must’ve been a difficult decision for him to make. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crymelanie Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 10 minutes ago, Saintlor said: This is absolutely not true It's way more hated to be gay (and be married to a woman) than to be a cheat Facts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
san784 Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 (edited) 8 minutes ago, Redstreak said: Where were you born? Some of us had parents saying being gay was the worst thing that could happen to them, pastors that pushed people into marriages that could “cure them”, murders and people saying they deserved it for existing. I really have to wonder what’s going on with some in here thinking 20 years ago was some gay utopia. Literally today we have kids getting kidnapped from their parents for being queer my statement still stands. Marrying some person while knowing that you are gay is absolutely wrong. The fair and right thing to do is don’t get married or just get married to someone who is aware of your situation but have no issues being in a marriage with a gay man but nothing you wrote makes it ok for a man to do this to a woman. It is wrong. Edited April 22, 2023 by san784 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cockatoo Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 People always assume these men have maliciously been hiding their sexuality for years. Some people take longer to figure this stuff out than others. Not everyone understands they're gay at 10 or whatever Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
State of Grace. Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 (edited) I always try to keep my expectations low when it comes to threads like this but wtf some of the comments here are a mess. Let alone the replies under that TERF's tweet It is a very unfortunate situation sadly. I usually have almost zero sympathy for gay men who get married and have a "normal gay life" and **** twinks behind their wives backs, but 21 years ago is a totally different time from now. We don't even know if the husband knew he was gay back then. Maybe he didn't have his gay awakening until years later? Not everyone realizes that they're a sissy at 13 lol. It is possible that he truly loved her too. I honestly feel for both of them. Now if this was a recent marriage and the husband hid his sexuality from her then he should be lashed imo. Edited April 22, 2023 by State of Grace. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redstreak Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 6 minutes ago, san784 said: my statement still stands. Marrying some person while knowing that you are gay is absolutely wrong. The fair and right thing to do is don’t get married or just get married to someone who is aware of your situation but have no issues being in a marriage with a gay man but nothing you wrote makes it ok for a man to do this to a woman. It is wrong. Once again you talk like this guy is doing it for fun and not genuinely hoping he’ll be turned Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MonsterTown Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 if he had to "hide" that he was gay for more than 20 years i have to blame his family, friends his bad childhood, society... because in a "happy" world that you all are pretending that he is in to not come out before.. makes no sense... every person is a world and every family or his own life its different than yours....didn't Bruce Jenner did come out and he was married with children?? we saw he loved his ex-wife and children so..stop the narrative of "evil gay man that throw everything away" isn't like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
san784 Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 8 minutes ago, Zox said: Or.. what if he was bi? What if he wasn’t sure because they got married young as most people did back then and thus he never got to experience/fully know? You do realize this situation isn’t ideal for him either, right? Lol. I doubt he wanted to stay in an “unhappy” marriage for that long. He probably went through waves of emotions feeling it was worth it to suppress his feelings to stay with his lover and to save their marriage. This must’ve been a difficult decision for him to make. If he was bi then he should’ve told her that. If he wasn’t sure of his sexuality/feelings then he should have never asked her to marry him. He should’ve sort that part of his life out first before bringing someone else into it. Too many people don’t take marriage serious enough and that’s why they rush into marriages without sorting out their feelings and getting to know themselves first. What he did was wrong and selfish and there is no excuse for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MonsterTown Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 5 minutes ago, cockatoo said: People always assume these men have maliciously been hiding their sexuality for years. Some people take longer to figure this stuff out than others. Not everyone understands they're gay at 10 or whatever also we can imagine 20 years ago when he was younger and at that time must be a harder society acceptance but also the most important thing, self acceptance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forever Winter Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 (edited) There's hope for S*a*n Edited April 22, 2023 by Taeyong Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Communion Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 That user is literally a straight woman who runs an anti-trans mag and went viral for mocking a gay teen with AIDs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Communion Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 16 minutes ago, san784 said: my statement still stands. Marrying some person while knowing that you are gay is absolutely wrong. The fair and right thing to do is don’t get married or just get married to someone who is aware of your situation but have no issues being in a marriage with a gay man but nothing you wrote makes it ok for a man to do this to a woman. It is wrong. Whose dupe is this?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
san784 Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 (edited) 12 minutes ago, Redstreak said: Once again you talk like this guy is doing it for fun and not genuinely hoping he’ll be turned Well, you don’t f**k with someone’s life like that. Sorry. There is absolutely nothing you can say to convince me that getting married to someone while knowing you’re gay or at least suspecting you could be gay isn’t selfish. If you think you’re gay don’t get married to a woman who literally have no idea you have these feelings. Do the right thing and give yourself time to sort your feelings out and be absolutely sure of who you are and what you want before tying yourself to someone who genuinely believes you’re 100% into them. Edited April 22, 2023 by san784 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
san784 Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 (edited) 3 minutes ago, Communion said: Whose dupe is this?? What does this have to do with this topic? If you have a sensible reply please respond with that but bringing this into this thread is pointless, irrelevant and just proves you can’t respond intelligently so you resort to these kind of tactics Edited April 22, 2023 by san784 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Communion Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 1 minute ago, san784 said: bringing this into this thread is pointless, irrelevant Why are you posting on ATRL while hating both transgender and gay people? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vixen Eyes Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 there is nothing wrong with finding who you are at a later time in your life. a lot of people are forced into living hetero lives because its all they know/are told is the "normal" thing to do Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Satin Posted April 22, 2023 Author Share Posted April 22, 2023 1 minute ago, Communion said: That user is literally a straight woman who runs an anti-trans mag and went viral for mocking a gay teen with AIDs. Not that What's she doing appropriating gay pngs all over her Twitter I think the subject is still interesting and there seem to be ATRLers on both sides of the conversation though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
san784 Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 Just now, Communion said: Why are you posting on ATRL while hating both transgender and gay people? There is absolutely nothing I said that indicates I hate transgender or gay people. If you jumped to that conclusion because I have a difference of opinion about certain topics then that’s your problem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poxy Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 (edited) EDIT: People clocked that twitter user is a rampant homophobe and transphobe. Disgusting, hopefully we don’t thread their “takes” or posts again Edited April 22, 2023 by Poxy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mordecai Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 Can we not with the revisionism Being gay only started to become somewhat acceptable in society's eyes a little over a decade ago, let's not act like coming out in the early 2000s would've been met with open arms. I feel sorry for the woman, nobody deserves something like that to happen to them and she probably feels betrayed or 'deceived' to some level. But I also applaud the man for being brave enough to finally live his truth. It shows the progress we're making. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smarticle Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 I wonder what the kids think Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reginald Posted April 22, 2023 Share Posted April 22, 2023 Interesting how a hateful, homophobic culture pushes people to lie, cheat, self-sabotage, and hurt the people who love them, in an effort to hide their true identity. Who could ever have predicted this?! (Sarcasm) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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