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my boyfriend ignores me in front of his friends


MoonGoodandHappy
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 I have a boyfriend and I had many problems with him, he ghosted me at one point for 1 week but i forgave him. And till now he was always the kind of guy who wanted to kiss me in public and is not scared to show me affection in front of people. 

But today, i was going to his university for the first time, i had a surprise for him but when he saw me, he was with his friends and he ignored me, like he doesnt even know me. 

So i really don't understand why because he always wanted to kiss me in public but why he ignored me like that ? I felt like so sad... 

He then left with his friends without even speaking to me.

And now he just text me to say that we can met at 7pm but the way he ignored me im really scared because i think maybe he will tell me that he don't want me anymore in his life... 

 

Also he is very very sad for 2 month now, he deal with depression and i love him so i always try to be make him smile but nothing work... And i cant dump him because i love him and i would be anxious because he is in a such dark moment in his life... 

 

And for 2 month now i feel sick every day i have stomach problems and im very sad because im scared for him, he say to me many times that he hate living, he hate his life. And so many things that make me so sad and im so anxious....

Edited by MoonGoodandHappy
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It is possible that your boyfriend was caught off guard and didn't know how to react when you surprised him at his university. He may have also felt self-conscious about showing affection in front of his friends. However, it is also possible that he is having second thoughts about the relationship and is trying to distance himself. It is important to have a conversation with him to understand his perspective and feelings. You can express how his behavior made you feel and ask him to be open and honest with you about what is going on. Remember that communication is key in any relationship.

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He is cheating on you with one of his gay friends in that group

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lmfao i hope this is bait but youre just a c*m sock to him and he probably has like 10 guys lined up if he ghosted u for a week. you think he is your bf but he defo doesn't think that ijbol :rip:

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2 minutes ago, Bloodflowers. said:

He is cheating on you with one of his gay friends in that group

Honestly this was my first thought. Hopefull this isn't it.

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Be realistic, who's bf would ghost them for a week? :rip: Unless you're like 16, but even then... The situation just sounds weird based off what you wrote in the op. I would just break up with him before he ends up doing it to you. :bird:

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dum him right away :heart: you deserve much better

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He may be using a manipulation technique where he alternates between making you feel good and then ignoring you. This can make you dependent on him as you crave his attention.

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Dump him you deserve better than that.

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15 minutes ago, MoonGoodandHappy said:

He then left with his friends without even speaking to me.

Leave him right now

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Why do y’all make these threads knowing damn well what the answer from any sane individual would be 

 

LEAVE

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11 minutes ago, gatito said:

dum him right away :heart: you deserve much better

I cant because he live with depression and i love him so much. It would be horrible to live without him, without knowing if he is still alive (because he has severe depression)

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Is being treated like **** a fetish of yours?

if not, you better run 

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Love yourself. Know your worth. Maintain your boundaries and self-respect. There’s plenty of fish in the sea and sometimes being alone is better than being disrespected or ignored by a so-called “partner”. You, like everyone else, deserve to be loved and respected and seen and heard in a relationship. Never settle for anything less that what you want, need and deserve. Also, red flags early on are always a good predictor of how a person is and how a relationship will transpire in the future. 
 

Anxiety, sadness and negative emotions are a normal response when going through a separation.or breakup. Avoiding these negative and uncomfortable feelings should never be a reason to stay in a dysfunctional or bad relationship. 

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29 minutes ago, MoonGoodandHappy said:

I have a boyfriend and I had many problems with him, he ghosted me at one point for 1 week but i forgave him

girl…ijbol

 

allowing yourself to be a doormat is one thing but it sounds like he’s using his depression as an excuse to make sure you don’t leave him so he can continue to emotionally torture you

Edited by Dolce Vita
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3 minutes ago, MoonGoodandHappy said:

I cant because he live with depression and i love him so much. It would be horrible to live without him, without knowing if he is still alive (because he has severe depression)

Important point: you can leave, but you’re choosing not to because of excuses. But the choice is yours because I assume you’re a free person that is able to make your own choices. So it’s not that you can’t leave your partner, it’s rather that you’re choosing not to leave him and choosing to stay in a relationship that’s not making you fully happy. And that’s your choice. But as long as you make such a choice, you also have to be prepared that it will be difficult and that you have to deal with the problems with your partner and your relationship. Because that’s what you’re choosing for whatever reason. Your partner having depression is not a reason to stay with him. A lot of people have depression and you can’t realistically be in a relationship with them because of that reason. You can’t save anybody, you don’t have that power I’m afraid. And you may love him, but you should love yourself more because he doesn’t seem to love you enough to acknowledge you when he’s with his friends. 

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Dig your keys into the side of his car

Carve your name into his seat

Slash a hole in all four tires

Smash both headlights

And f*ck his brother

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7 minutes ago, Julianna Calm Down said:

Important point: you can leave, but you’re choosing not to because of excuses. But the choice is yours because I assume you’re a free person that is able to make your own choices. So it’s not that you can’t leave your partner, it’s rather that you’re choosing not to leave him and choosing to stay in a relationship that’s not making you fully happy. And that’s your choice. But as long as you make such a choice, you also have to be prepared that it will be difficult and that you have to deal with the problems with your partner and your relationship. Because that’s what you’re choosing for whatever reason. Your partner having depression is not a reason to stay with him. A lot of people have depression and you can’t realistically be in a relationship with them because of that reason. You can’t save anybody, you don’t have that power I’m afraid. And you may love him, but you should love yourself more because he doesn’t seem to love you enough to acknowledge you when he’s with his friends. 

I know.... But it's so scary because sometimes when he text me things like "i want to die" and horrible text that make me sick for hours and sometimes days because he sometimes "want to be alone" so i know he want to die but i cant see him... It's so horrible... My life is hell for 2 month now.  Thank you for this message...:heart2:

Edited by MoonGoodandHappy
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You're either less than smart or younger than 21. 

I hope the latter, because eventually you'll grow out of your early twenties.

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... serious question , are you 17 or something ?

 

why do you even need advice on this :rip: he probably didn't acknowledge you in front of his friends because he has other guys and he didn't want his friends mentioning something about the other guys in front of you and exposing him .

also, ghosted you for a week ?? A WEEK ?? please be for ******* real

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did you ask him why he had ignored you?

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Just now, Flomik said:

did you ask him why he had ignored you?

I will ask him that at 7pm when we'll meet.

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2 minutes ago, MoonGoodandHappy said:

I know.... But it's so scary because sometimes when he text me things like "i want to die" and horrible text that make me sick for hours and sometimes days because he sometimes "want to be alone" so i know he want to die but i cant see him... It's so horrible... My life is hell for 2 month now.  Thank you for this message...:heart2:

He is both manipulating you and depressed.  What he needs is professional help from a therapist and medication, not a boyfriend.  He’s treating you like **** on purpose and you need to acknowledge this.  If he shows no desire and takes no major actions to get better, then there is absolutely no hope for your relationship.  He will stay depressed and continue to use that as a way to manipulate and control you.  He knows he is making you feel horrible and he continues to do it on purpose because he can tell you are too… inexperienced, we’ll call it that, to see through his BS.  Leave him and take care of yourself.  If his ends his life one day, it won’t be because of you, his problems are far beyond you and there is nothing you can do to change him.  You’ve already done more than you should have IMO.  Leave him, no contact, block all of his numbers, block his emails, block him on socials, make all of your social accounts private, don’t let him in your house and pretend you’re not home if he shows up, etc.  Do everything in your power to make it so he cannot contact you because he will do anything to try and weasel his way back into your life.  He might be insane and you’ll want to tell your friends and family about his problems if possible and to watch out for him if he tries to contact anyone.  You deserve someone who is going to be there for you and loves you, not someone who uses you as an emotional punching bag and for sex but then ghosts you and ignores you in front of their friends.  Not acceptable.

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