tournament Golden Hit: Season 2 📀 Congratulations Hug! 🏆

[Legend E]

sent, flopped, coming for a below 7 score  

 

hope y'all received it  

[Euterpe]

My first true, last minute submission is upon me. R.I.P. my scores.

[JoeAg]

submitted, and it’s total bs cause i wrote it in like 10 minutes lol

[JoeAg]

this one is markedly more of a plot twist moment, which i guess might appeal to some of y’all

[Hug]

I did something...different for me? Well different in that it's personal/non-fiction as opposed to the fictional stuff I usually do.

[fountain]

The songs of Round 5, The Dreamscape Challenge:

 

@camfuckingrockwell - Paradise

@Kylie Jenner - Ephemeral

@hurricane326 - A Conversation With Nik

@XO_Life - Dreamscape

@Hug - The You I Remember

@TruGemini - Same Old Discussions

@Allday - Night Terrors

@Julia Fox - Blurry

@beatinglikeadrum - C13H16N2O2

@Augmented - The Fall

@Legend E - Floating By (-¿zzz?-)

@Euterpe - Did you hear that?

@JoeAg - Felt You Watching Over Me

@Element - NIGHT VISIONS II: TETRIS HYPNOTIC

@worldwide angel - Twilight

Edited September 23, 2022 by fountain

[fountain]

 

Welcome Season 1 Judge @Element with their first submission “NIGHT VISIONS II: TETRIS HYPNOTIC”!!  Super excited to read your song, already highly intrigued by the title. Thank you for submitting, and welcome to Season 2! 

[fountain]

20 hours ago, worldwide angel said:

almost done  

 

[fountain]

22 hours ago, Allday said:

Sent and flopped

 

 

 

 

22 hours ago, beatinglikeadrum said:

Sent. Flopped

 

13 hours ago, Legend E said:

sent, flopped, coming for a below 7 score  

 

hope y'all received it  

 

12 hours ago, Euterpe said:

My first true, last minute submission is upon me. R.I.P. my scores.

 

11 hours ago, JoeAg said:

submitted, and it’s total bs cause i wrote it in like 10 minutes lol

[Legend E]

48 minutes ago, fountain said:

 

 

Welcome Season 1 Judge @Element with their first submission “NIGHT VISIONS II: TETRIS HYPNOTIC”!!  Super excited to read your song, already highly intrigued by the title. Thank you for submitting, and welcome to Season 2! 

 

A song about how much sleep he had since he never posted reviews for season 1?

[Element]

48 minutes ago, fountain said:

 

 

Welcome Season 1 Judge @Element with their first submission “NIGHT VISIONS II: TETRIS HYPNOTIC”!!  Super excited to read your song, already highly intrigued by the title. Thank you for submitting, and welcome to Season 2! 

 

thank youuuuuuu! i was very excited by this challenge prompt and wanted to get creative

[Element]

Just now, Legend E said:

A song about how much sleep he had since he never posted reviews for season 1?

EXACTLY... i was too busy playing tetris i fear

[Legend E]

Just now, Element said:

EXACTLY... i was too busy playing tetris i fear

You and FatBox wheww

[worldwide angel]

43 minutes ago, fountain said:

 

might have to ask for a bit of an extension   maybe another hour 

[fountain]

21 minutes ago, worldwide angel said:

might have to ask for a bit of an extension   maybe another hour 

No problem! 

[worldwide angel]

18 minutes ago, fountain said:

No problem! 

forced myself to finish. might not be my clearest song but it’s definitely the start of something beautiful  lemme submit 

[fountain]

33 minutes ago, worldwide angel said:

forced myself to finish. might not be my clearest song but it’s definitely the start of something beautiful  lemme submit 

Yay thank you

[JoeAg]

1 hour ago, fountain said:

 

 

 

 

i’m more confident this morning actually

[Alldeezy]

On 9/23/2022 at 1:57 PM, JoeAg said:

submitted, and it’s total bs cause i wrote it in like 10 minutes lol

legit same! quickest song ive ever written

 

 

 

[JoeAg]

1 hour ago, Allday said:

legit same! quickest song ive ever written

 

 

 

our joint serve queen

 

(also I love how you just have all of these allday gifs on hand and he looks cute in all of them ugh)

[Alldeezy]

26 minutes ago, JoeAg said:

our joint serve queen

 

(also I love how you just have all of these allday gifs on hand and he looks cute in all of them ugh)

hehe naw ty, yeah felt like it gives more personality in a post! he is always doing something kinda adorable so made them into cute gifs 

 

 

[fountain]

Round 5: The Dreamscape Challenge

 

@camfuckingrockwell - Paradise

I’m really glad that you have submitted again, welcome back! I think this song is a really nice interpretation of the challenge, and something probably very universally relatable for most people, we all have moments like this before sleep when we ponder and get lost in our thoughts, and I think your song described a moment like that well. I like the overall questioning lyrics to the song, a lot like sleep and dreams (and paradise itself) not much is known and it presents some nice thoughtful questions; obviously mainly is paradise real, and will I ever get to experience something like that? I like that you left the song open ended and able to be interpreted, it feels realistic and relatable that we don’t know ultimately what will happen to us and that is quite poignant in a way. However if I was to provide some constructive advice for this song, I think it could have used expanding a little more. I like what you have and think it’s a great starting point, but I think the ideas could be pushed a little farther; particularly the song could use a little more context/background to it, we understand that the narrator feels this way and we get to see it explored throughout the song, however we are never told why this person feels this was, there’s no reasoning for the emotion, and I think some background into that could have helped elevate the song and the story a little more. Ultimately though I think you did a good job, and like I said at the start I’m very glad you chose to submit again! I hope we get to see you again next round for the final challenge!

 

@Kylie Jenner - Ephemeral

I think you’ve done a good job of taking the criticism given in the past and applying it here. This writing is definitely elevated compared to some of your earlier songs, it’s a lot more vivid and stylistic, and I think it’s definitely a step up. I like your concept overall of somebody being obsessed with dreams, it’s quite an interesting one and not one that I particularly expected so I find it quite refreshing. The idea of somebody being so entranced by dreams that they begin to reject the real world and confuse the two is really interesting and I enjoyed how your song explored that. It’s almost mystic or whimsical in a way, and maybe this sense could’ve been highlighted or played with a bit more in the song. Overall though I think this is a definite improvement here, and personally probably my favourite song that you have submitted all season. Good job!

 

@hurricane326 - A Conversation With Nik

This is very conceptual and I’m not sure how it might work for everybody, but personally I really appreciated it. Despite being so conceptual, it’s also very personal, which makes for a very interesting piece overall. It’s quite the reading experience, and I think as you expected based on your posts, I don’t think we’ve seen any other submission like this really. It’s a very interesting take on the challenge, you’ve explained where your inspiration came from with the dream aspect however I don’t think that’s as fully clear in the song itself so if I had any constructive advice I would say that part could’ve been played up more, but it’s a very valid and unique take on the challenge. Interestingly it also would’ve been very fitting for last rounds challenge too since so much of the song was spoken, personally I liked this however I can’t say that everybody will be as open minded as I am since others usually expect more lyrical writing, but I enjoyed it. Overall it’s hard to put into words the effect of your song, it’s thoughtful and poignant but also dark and scary; my biggest praise though would be that it is incredibly unique and certainly showcases writing as a deep art form and not just as a thing for fun. It has a very clear message even if the story is partly ugly, and I’m impressed both at the willingness to write this and the willingness to share it. I think you’ve done a great job. 

 

@XO_Life - Dreamscape

This is a really nice interpretation of the challenge. Rather than literally being about dreams I appreciate that you took it in the direction instead that we need to try and better our world and to make it more like dreams where there are no worries, no pain and no hate. The song overall has a great message and I think you explored this well. I would say some of the specific lyrics could take another look at to make sure they are as well thought out as they could be (the lines rhyming news/Jews was a biT of a choice; it’s much too direct and on the nose, though I appreciate the sentiment). If I’m totally honest, I don’t think it’s as strong as your last entry; that one overall felt a little more poignant, but I think this song is still good itself but could maybe be pushed a little more in terms of the lyricism. This song seems to have more of a focus on being catchy and pop which I appreciate, but I think a song with a message like this might have come across easier if it were more in the vein of your last entry rather than as a pop song, perhaps, so that it could have been explored a little more freely. Overall though I think this is another good entry from you. 

 

@Hug - The You I Remember

This is an incredibly touching song, and the combination of both the story of you and your mother, and the dream that you had about her and how it made you remember her afterwards, is beautiful. It’s just really, really beautiful. You’ve written some very impressive and creative songs throughout this season, but there’s just always something special about the more personal songs. Of course not every entry can be like this, but the moments when we do get to read songs like this, they are greatly important and moving. This was simply stunning, and it’s my favourite song from you so far. Perfect job. Well done.

 

 

@TruGemini - Same Old Discussions

I really liked the concept and the discussion of how sometimes in love it can feel like a stagnant cycle where you keep repeating the same things and having the same discussions, and I liked how this was explored throughout the song like nice comparisons like being stuck in stasis or in a dream. However, I don’t think the song gives off enough of a dream vibe as I could have hoped for, I understand from the description of the song that you tried to incorporate this into the structure of the song, but when it comes to the actual lyrics within the song we don’t really see any incorporation of the challenge until the very last section, so I would have liked to see it developed more throughout the whole song lyrically too. But, instead of looking at what the song didn’t do and instead focusing on what it did do, I think this is a nice exploration of a relationship and as usual I love the flare that I know I can always count on in your writing. Overall a good song, but could have incorporated the challenge more directly. 

 

@Allday - Night Terrors

I think you’ve incorporated the challenge wonderfully in your song, and choosing to explore the theme of night terrors feels really fitting for the type of music style that I’ve come to expect from you. I think this is probably your strongest entry so far, in the past I’ve given feedback that you might not have incorporated the challenges enough but this time you’ve definitely excelled at it and written something fully encompassed in the theme and explored it nicely. I also liked the inclusion of the idea that because of these experiences the narrator would be afraid to go asleep again, which as somebody who’s experienced night terrors I can relate to, and I liked that this was represented because I think most people who don’t suffer with sleep related issues wouldn’t have any idea that there are people who fear or hate the idea of sleeping (it was only one lyric so maybe it could’ve been explored more throughout the song but at the very least I liked this aspect a lot). Overall I think this is a good entry, and like I said probably your best and most well rounded so far. Good job!

 

@Julia Fox - Blurry

Ms. Fox, this song is up there with vintage for me, I really enjoyed it! I loved the way you tackled this challenge in such a vividly beautiful way with your imagery, but also kept it very unique and artsy with some of your choices (dry lips, tiny eyes), and also had the relationship aspect and it’s story to help ground the song too and not make it too dreamy; it was really nicely balanced and I can say there isn’t any part of it that I didn’t enjoy. Lyrically I think the song is really strong too, my absolutely favourite thing about your writing is your unique perspective and I love when you sprinkle your songs with really interesting images such as the ones mentioned above; I can say we’ve had no other lyrics mention dry lips or tiny eyes yet with your style you pull them off so naturally and I think it’s the best part of your writing in my opinion. Personally, I’d love for your final song next round to see you embrace this to the absolute maximum and fill your entry with as many of these unique ideas that come to you as possible (though not in a forced way; so long as they are natural and make sense to the song). Overall though I think this is a strong entry, perhaps your best, certainly fighting for the title with vintage. Good job!

 

@beatinglikeadrum - C13H16N2O2

Okay I liked your last entry but now THIS is a return to form. I just absolutely adore your abstract poetic style. This is a really strong exploration of dreams, really enthralling and a wonderful interpretation of the challenge. Your lyrics totally pull me in, you definitely have a way with words and when you put your all into a song (and don’t serve a Cock-a-doodle-do moment) you just absolutely serve. My review will have to be on the shorter side unfortunately, because there are only so many ways to say that I enjoyed something. But I did, I really enjoyed this. Very good job!

 

@Augmented - The Fall

I really love the conceptual nature of this and it definitely feels like you’ve pushed yourself and put a lot into this entry. At first when reading through I didn’t think it was touching on the challenge enough, but then when it became more clear throughout the song, and once I reached the part where the connection is made  between dreams being the only  place where this person can be their true self and the waking world actually being more of a nightmare itself, inflicted by sleep, that I really fell in love with the interpretation. It’s a really nice take on both the sleep challenge and also incorporation of deeper themes about society and discrimination, and I thought it was really well done. I think this is some of your most lyrically strong writing to date too, usually your writing is a little more simpler or straight forward (not in a bad way, but in a personal and direct way) but I think you really pushed yourself stylistically here and it was fun to see. Great job, another very strong entry from you!

 

@Legend E - Floating By (-¿zzz?-)

There are parts of this that I enjoyed and parts of this that I think could have used a little more work. I really enjoy the overall theme, it’s of course entirely encompassing of the challenge at hand, and the topic of insomnia and how it invaded and effects your life in so many ways is really nicely explored here and as somebody who does suffer with insomnia I thought it was pretty relatable and well described. That said, I think some of the lyrics perhaps could have been reworded a little to get their point across better, lines 2-4 of the chorus I think could use reworking (specifically the latter two because I’m not entirely sure what the whispers are supposed to represent or why the morning screams tbh), and I like the idea of the outro too but I think some of the lyrics could be a bit more refined there also. That said, there’s also some lyrics that I really enjoyed, specifically the talking to the stars and count a million sheep lines, so it’s somewhat of a mix for me. Overall, I think this is good, it’s not your strongest entry but I really like the ideas presented here, I just think it could use a little more time to polish it and then the song would be even stronger. 

 

@Euterpe - Did you hear that?

So I have never heard of exploding head syndrome but what an interesting basis for a song (and what a terrible thing to deal with, I’m sorry), I’ve looked into a little to accompany your entry and I’m left very intrigued and little more knowledgeable so thanks! The inclusion of this specific sleeping disorder really elevates the entry for me, we’ve had a few entries that have dealt with fear towards sleep in general which have been enjoyable, but having a particular reason behind it with this inspiration for this song really pushes it that bit further for me. I think the song has demonstrated what it must be like to deal with this condition spectacularly, the song really does have this panicked, alarmed feel to it which is really nicely executed and definitely heightens the reading experience; I felt put in that place through your writing, which is a really strong sign. Considering this was a last minute entry for you, I’m impressed. I feel overall this is another great, strong entry from you, a wonderful take on the challenge and an example of some writing that I found to be quite immersive. Great job!

 

@JoeAg - Felt You Watching Over Me

As usual I think your lyricism is absolutely lovely, you truly have a very natural way with words and then just flow off the page so wonderfully to me. Now, for as much as I love your writing, I don’t know if the story behind the song supported it enough for me to love the song overall. If I’m totally honest, this song has kind of gone over my head. I’m not really sure how it is supposed to make me feel or what it is supposed to make me think, and when rereading it I don’t really seem to get any closer to an answer. I really enjoy the reveal at the end that the song is in reference to being watched over by a Grandmother, but the song to me doesn’t really reference this relationship specifically enough to strongly form any effect behind the connection for me. There are some really lovely worded lyrics that seem to hint at this background, but it isn’t explored enough for me to know the significance of whatever has happened prior, if that makes sense? The language is wonderful and flowery, but I don’t feel there is enough emotion or context behind it for me to realistically connect with this song as an outside reader, to be honest. Now to you that could be a different experience because I’m assuming it’s personal to you and you can understand these things more, but for somebody like me on the outside looking in I do think it was lacking for it to really have the effect on me that I think it was intended to. Which honestly is a shame because as I’ve said quite a few times the writing itself is so nice and enjoyable to read, but when I’m reaching for context and the narrative behind it, I’m coming back empty handed. Overall a bit of a mixed one for me, your talent as a writer is very clear but I do think this song could’ve used more connective tissue. 

 

@Element - NIGHT VISIONS II: TETRIS HYPNOTIC

I have to say I really was not expecting a submission from you at all, so this is such a pleasant surprise! Now, I hadn’t heard of the Tetris effect before… but omg I think I’ve actually experienced it before. My grandmother used to play games similar to that and I would watch her and sometimes it would manifest in my dreams, but they would almost be more like nightmares because I would feel trapped within this game and then as the pieces continue to fall and the pace increases it would be really overwhelming and these were reoccurring dreams for me and I didn’t realise this was an actual phenomenon so I’m honestly very enlightened by this submission. Now for the song itself… this is such a wonderful submission! This is a really fun and creative take on the challenge and made for a really nice read. Obviously everybody knows what Tetris looks like so the song was instantly completely vivid and with its video game aesthetic there was almost this duality because it gives off that fun vibe but then of course the song is actually about this anxiety and unrelenting game ongoing which made for overall a really interesting layered feeling to the song. What I love most I’d say is that you totally went all in with the concept, splitting up each section of the song as another “level” of the game, all the references to the Tetris pieces and the imagery throughout just makes everything come together as a really polished creation. Overall this is a really strong entry, it’s definitely clear that this challenge clicked with you and sparked a great piece of inspiration and I’m glad you took it and wrote this song. Great job, and here’s hoping we may one day be blessed by your presence again! 

 

@worldwide angel - Twilight

I really love your depiction of dreams as this blurry yet enticing thing, the song as a whole is super vivid in this way and really paints a beautiful picture of the world of dreams, or rather as you describe it the “twilight”. I also absolutely loved the idea that there exists two versions of the self, the you who exists in the waking world and the you who exists in the twilight, and that these are two parts of the soul; this was really stunning. I think this challenge was a wonderful fit for your writing and I think you’ve done a fantastic job of applying the inspiration to your song and exploring it; your writing is so full of beautiful imagery and this paired really nicely with the world of twilight that you have depicted here, and the emotions that surround a place like that and getting to experience it. I, too, really loved getting a peek into this world and am left feeling like the character in this story wanting more! Overall this is another wonderful entry from you, I’m really glad you were able to submit again this round and I hope we get to see you again for the final round!

Edited September 26, 2022 by fountain

[fountain]

Here’s my first few reviews so I don’t keep you waiting until I have them all completed! Will post the next 5 when I have them done too.

 

[XO_Life]

@fountain I totally agree with you!!! 

I also thought some of the lyrics were too cringe.

[Galah]

Hi all, just wanted to give you a quick update from me personally since I know as a contestant I appreciated host/judge transparency!

 

If you've been keeping up with my incoherent and sparse ramblings, you might know I was out of the state this past week for work. Since returning, I haven't really had a spare moment to myself and regrettably have not had a chance to review your songs as of yet. While I still plan to, and will 100% be scoring your submissions for this round, I'm not certain if I will be posting reviews prior to results. I want to give your songs the amount of attention they deserve, so I will use my best judgement whether I post some R1-esque length reviews for your songs in the next 24 hours, or hold off until next week. I appreciate your understanding. Until then, look forward to your reviews from the other fantastic judges!

 

It's also fantastic to see an increase in submissions following the previous two rounds! Welcome @Element, I've added you into the OP as an official "hitmaker" for this season. Glad you were inspired by this challenge! I've also finally had a chance to update the Golden Links post with reviews and results from Round 4's Spoken Word challenge. 8th's R4 reviews and the R4 Hit Tokens will most likely be coming alongside their R5 counterparts, so keep an eye out for those!

 

Finally, we have something special planned for Season 2's finale... you didn't think we'd organise something basic, did you? As such, we might need a smidge extra prep time, so keep an eye out for the Round 6 finale challenge being posted tomorrow evening, Sep 25. This one should really mix things up!