fountain Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 19 minutes ago, Remmy said: not a spider glad you got it <33 Hide contents praying there's no babies or relatives around I was like what??? But then I realised spiders have babies and relatives themselves Ngl, I was concerned that the spider I got was not the original one that disappeared, but let’s assume, for my sake, that it was the same sexy anthropod !
Remmy Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 19 minutes ago, fountain said: I was like what??? But then I realised spiders have babies and relatives themselves Ngl, I was concerned that the spider I got was not the original one that disappeared, but let’s assume, for my sake, that it was the same sexy anthropod ! Period!!!
Hug Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 omg acclaim ? 1 hour ago, fountain said: Not only have you tackled the challenge and also brought in the story of Adam and Eve and the snake/Lilith in a really fresh and interesting way, but on top of all this you’ve also added in really powerful themes of what it means to be a women; themes which are still timely to this day, and when you contrast that literally to the story of humanity’s creation, it’s really impressive I'm particularly glad this was pointed this out because the biggest reason I wanted to write this was because of how Lilith is probably one the earliest and one of most relevant examples of a feminist, but she's painted to be this demon/villain which is really ****** up ? it just lent itself really well to ideas I already had about how women are viewed in Christianity. I am glad you see the vision <3
DatChickDoe Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 4 hours ago, fountain said: Round 1: The Zoology Challenge, Part 1 @Kylie Jenner - Eve Congrats on being the first submission of season two! Immediately, my initial thought when looking at your submission was that your concept was a really creative way of meeting the challenge of writing inspired by an animal, while incorporating biblical themes through the story of Eve; this is very well thought out conceptually and a really strong start on that front. Lyrically I think your song is quite strong too, the song overall is very cohesive and puts its message and story across well, and there is no part that wavers or falls flat in that regard. I would say that when it comes to some specific lines though, I think the writing could’ve been pushed further. There are some instances throughout the song where the lyric itself can lack uniqueness a bit - general ideas such as dealing with the demons, loving the pain, it making you insane, these are pretty beaten to death in music and I think perhaps you could have pushed the creativity in these parts a little more so that lyrically the creativeness was as strong as the concept behind the song itself; ultimately some of these specific lines felt almost as if they were kind of like the first thing that came to your mind and you just went with it, and I think the easy rhymes that are in these parts of the songs also heightened the feeling. On the contrary, to praise a part that I thought was the strongest lyrically, I really enjoyed the bridge, specifically the two final lines of the song which I think were the most resonant. Ultimately I would say that in the future I would work more to make sure that each lyric in your song is unique as well as being purposeful to the overall song, and that will strengthen your writing as a whole to the same high that I think you have shown your concepts to be on first impression, and hopefully those concepts continue to be interesting like this one! Overall though for a first entry this is a very solid, good job. @Julia Fox - Crying Birds I think this song demonstrates what began at the end of season one, which is amazing growth in your writing, and it’s amazing to see this continue. I think that conceptually this is one of your most interesting songs to date, and probably the best executed in terms of matching the overall themes about questioning behind the song, with your writing, which is a great pairing here. What I like is that you’ve really painted this picture here and the song itself is very vivid, I too want to know what is going on with the birds and how they are, and it almost gave a dystopian novel type feeling to the song, that something sinister is brewing and the protagonist in the song can do nothing but be witness to it and notice these things and what is happening to the world. In terms of the challenge this is obviously a great success too since the birds are such an integral part of the story and the lyrics, the song truly takes inspiration from them so you’ve done a wonderful job tackling the challenge. Overall I found this to be a really intriguing and enjoyable entry, in general I do typically love questioning themes and writing that is open to interpretation, but I do truly think that you excelled in this style regardless and that this is one of the best songs I’ve seen from you; great job! @DatChickDoe - Bite I really enjoyed the overall vibe of this song, it gives me dark club feels, I can picture it as like a Tove Lo song or something like that, so it’s well written in the sense that I can really visualise this song and hear it too, to a degree. I also enjoyed the back and forth between the two people in the song, the predator and the prey if you will, and that at the end of the song the prey steps up to bite; this gives the song a great energy throughout it and means it never feels stagnant or lacking storywise. I will say, in terms of the challenge itself, I don’t think this is the best execution of it. While there are some animalistic phrases and behaviour within the song, there is only two specific mentions of animals, which is the widow in the bridge and the shark in the first verse, and I think the premise of the challenge was more so to write a song that encompasses a specific animal rather than animalistic behaviour in general; however I can’t fault you too much on this because it seems mostly to be more of a misunderstanding of the challenge rather than a lacking interpretation of it, I think. There are some lyrics that I found particularly strong, I really enjoyed the second verse (the Shakespeare part of the song) and the chorus as a whole is also very solid and has some very nice writing to it, these moments your word choice and writing really shined and I look forward to the future and seeing your develop this more and see what you can create, because I think you have it in you to peak right at the top with some more experience and work. Overall a good start to the season. @Hug - Lilith Okay, so this is the second snake from the Garden of Eden song, but I still think it’s a really creative and interesting take on the challenge, so I’m not going to let that skew my impression of your song. *insert me reading the song here* Well, I have to say, I think this is genius. You’ve so excellently retold the biblical story in a interesting way here and from a fresh perspective, with which the song is filled to the brim with nuance and layers that I think is just, as I said, genius. Not only have you tackled the challenge and also brought in the story of Adam and Eve and the snake/Lilith in a really fresh and interesting way, but on top of all this you’ve also added in really powerful themes of what it means to be a women; themes which are still timely to this day, and when you contrast that literally to the story of humanity’s creation, it’s really impressive. Now, one could still attempt all of this but ultimately fail due to the writing not pulling this all off; but of course, that isn’t the case with you, your writing is as strong as ever and your lyrics remain tight and smooth throughout the song. I could certainly be forgetting specifics about season one, but I’m definitely inclined to agree with what you posted in the thread - this is probably the best song you’ve submitted in Golden Hit thus far. Seriously fantastic. @worldwide angel - Eternal Wow, reading this song was literally so refreshing and blissful, I was so happy and excited while reading it. Being able to achieve that with your writing is such an incredible sign of something special and with this being the first song I’ve ever read from you, I’m immediately really impressed and intrigued in what you could write in the future for the next challenges. Even though the song has a sombre ending, my impression of it is still beaming and so joyous because your writing itself to me completely embodied that feeling and has such an overall dreamlike, starry presence to it that even though it went there, it still feels beautiful, if that makes sense? The song itself conceptually too is such a unique idea - a turtle swimming in a waterfall - like who thinks of that? Your mind! This is an instance where I kind of struggle to know what to say because I enjoyed the experience of reading the song so much that it’s hard to not gush solely about that. But, do you mind if that’s what this review mostly consists of? Because that’s how I felt and the reaction I had reading your song. I loved it, and I cannot wait to see what you write next. @Better Mistakes - Don’t Leave My Life So I read the description of your song first and I was wondering wtf I was about to get myself into, but actually it was a nice pleasant surprise to see how sweet the song actually was. There are some really lovely lyrics here and the overall sentiment of the song, and the theme of wondering about being abandoned or forgotten by somebody important to you, is really well put across. I feel though that the song is perhaps a little short, the two verses are only 4 lines each, the bridge is mostly repetition, and unfortunately this means that there is less area for your writing to be shown off; I think these sections could have used with being expanded, which could have given you more room to impress lyrically, and also more potential to develop the narrative and the story of the song further. I have to say, I don’t get any animal inspiration from this. Like, none at all. If you hadn’t have said that this was intended to be read from the perspective of a pet, then I absolutely never would have guessed that it was supposed to be. Still, even with that context, the song doesn’t resemble the focus of the challenge, in my opinion. That said, the challenge can be put aside and if we look at the song itself, I think this is a very sweet and sentimental song, and I believe it is one of the songs I have enjoyed reading from you the most; so in that regard this is a good job. @hurricane326 - I Walk Alone I had never heard of the Jersey Devil before so took to googling it quickly, really interesting to hear about! I’m glad that somebody chose to go down the route of a folklore creature for this challenge, and I think this concept was perfect for you and paired with your writing style magnificently. I love that you have taken the inspiration of a creature from folklore that is often feared, or used to scare, and instead portrayed the creature here in your song as sympathetic and deserving of empathy, it really shows your nuance both in your concepts and with your writing, since you absolutely pulled it off. The multiple uses of the key phrase ‘alone’ and the way that the idea of being alone was adapted throughout the song and took on different meanings was also marvellous, and made for a really great and fulfilling reading experience. As usual, your writing and the lyrics themselves are very strong throughout the entirety of the song, helping lift up and not only tell your story but also force the reader to visualise it in their mind, the sign of a great storyteller. Overall, I think you’ve done a fantastic and unique job here, another very impressive song from you! Thank you so much for the feedback. I apologize for the misunderstanding. Definitely will keep working on the improvement of the quality of lyrics.
fountain Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 24 minutes ago, DatChickDoe said: Thank you so much for the feedback. I apologize for the misunderstanding. Definitely will keep working on the improvement of the quality of lyrics. Your song still stands on its own despite the challenge and there was a lot to praise it for too; nothing to apologise for
fountain Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 @Jack! your google doc is unable to be opened, you need to change the settings so that we are able to view it same issue with yours still @Allday
Jack! Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 Oops, sorry that should be it sorted now! @fountain
fountain Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 1 minute ago, Jack! said: Oops, sorry that should be it sorted now! @fountain Yep it’s fixed, thank you!
Jackson Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 11 hours ago, fountain said: Ew I just got attacked by a big spider. I’m not even usually scared of spiders but now it’s disappeared somewhere in my room because I didn’t have anything to get it with straight away, so who knows where it is. Unsettling but I suppose this is very fitting for the Zoology challenge I squished a spider in my bathroom last night and it had like bright purple guts . Literally nothing worse than spiders idk how @Aurora survives Australia
ATRL Moderator Legend E Posted August 27, 2022 ATRL Moderator Posted August 27, 2022 omg speaking of insects, i should have written a song about the ones i have to deal with quite daily! a song about silverfish yas! (actually it would've been fitting with the rest of the song since they're very fast svdfv;)
fountain Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 39 minutes ago, Jackson said: I squished a spider in my bathroom last night and it had like bright purple guts . Literally nothing worse than spiders idk how @Aurora survives Australia This one was very brown and looking at it you could see each individual hair on its legs love that Personally though I find reptiles more atrocious than insects… like, snakes? Lizards and ****? Absolutely revolting. And frankly, amphibians can **** off too.
fountain Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 30 minutes ago, Legend E said: omg speaking of insects, i should have written a song about the ones i have to deal with quite daily! a song about silverfish yas! (actually it would've been fitting with the rest of the song since they're very fast svdfv;) Honestly silverfish would’ve been a serve
ATRL Moderator Legend E Posted August 27, 2022 ATRL Moderator Posted August 27, 2022 13 minutes ago, fountain said: Honestly silverfish would’ve been a serve The Nick Cannons of insects wheww
Julia Fox Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 Thank you for your critiques @fountain glad you liked my song
Galah Posted August 27, 2022 Author Posted August 27, 2022 Hey, Hitmakers! Thank you all for supporting and submitting for Round 1 of Golden Hit: Season 2! It was a pleasure reading all of your songs again. Due to time constraints on my end, my reviews for R1 are going to be on the shorter side. Fortunately, I should be able to delve in a little deeper for R2! If there is anything in your review that you do not wish to have public (lyric excerpts, references to your material etc.) I will remove it upon request. 1. @Kylie Jenner - “Eve” I enjoyed this a lot. Your animal of choice was clever, and complemented the well known tale of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden very naturally. The lyrics and images that referred to the snake, such as spitting words like venom, “cold blooded love”, and the latter part of the bridge were definitely highlights. Thank you for a strong start to Golden Hit: Season 2! 2. @Julia Fox - “Crying Birds” This was a hauntingly beautiful sentiment. It’s very true that the common folk’s understanding of avian communication is rather rudimentary, and what we may interpret as happy, carefree singing could be something else entirely. I also interpreted this piece as sort of a pessimist’s worldview; everything has been so sad since that special someone left, that even happy birds are interpreted as a negative. Thought-provoking! 3. @DatChickDoe - “Bite” I definitely wasn’t expecting this animal inspiration, but I’m pleasantly surprised. You could have gone down the water imagery angle, and while you did a little in the second verse, I like how you’ve committed to a dance club setting. The image of someone circling the dance floor like a shark circling its prey definitely worked! I’m glad you had fun, because I had fun reading it, and it was nice to see something like this from you this season. 4. @Hug - “Lilith” I certainly didn’t anticipate many overlapping animals this round, let alone the specific snake from the garden of Eden. Curious! This was an interesting offering from you, and I enjoyed the risk of some of the more archaic syntax. It was a definitely stylistic choice that I believe aided this piece. We love an equality anthem, and as far as they go, this was definitely a strong one. 5. @worldwide angel - “Eternal” Welcome to the tournament! This was a nice first offering from you, I didn’t pick up on your animal inspiration at first but upon a re-read, lyrics such as the first journey and “sturdy shield” made a lot more sense. You have a strong sense of rhythm and, I imagine, melody. Lyrically, I think there was definitely more room for opportunity to expand on some of those comparisons between daydreaming in the shower and a turtle in a waterfall, and creating some interesting, deep metaphors while retaining all of that lovely imagery. Well done! 6. @Allday - “Animal For You” Thank you for unlocking your document! This was definitely an interesting read. Curious decision to opt for animal as a singular untamed, ravenous entity, but I think it works for this kind of song. Some of the more disturbing images such as those explored in the chorus were bold risks, although I’m not completely sure if they were to my taste. I did like the metaphorical comparison between woman and beast, and look forward to your next offering. Consider proofreading next time to avoid any little errors i.e. “shrap”. 7. @Better Mistakes - “Don't Leave My Life” I didn’t pick up on the animal inspiration until I read your other information section, which in reality just means your song could be interpreted in a number of different ways. I think for this specific challenge, it would have been strengthened by a handful of lyrics that made it clear it was from a pet’s perspective amongst the more ambiguous and all-applicable lyricism. The bridge could have been that perfect “a-ha” moment where any misconceptions that the song is from the point of view of a person rather than an animal are cleared up. 8. @hurricane326 - “I Walk Alone” This was fantastic! Being an uncultured Australian, I hadn’t actually heard of the Jersey Devil, so that was certainly an eye-opening read. After a quick education from the University of Wikipedia, I can say you’ve done a wonderful effort to integrate so many details into this piece, yet when reading it unaware of these details, it still translates as an epic, almost Nordic folk type song. Your unique style and poetic aptitude served you well here, and this was a strong debut for you this season. 9. @EpicSongFan - “Sweet Escape” Birds and wolves are definitely solid choices for inspiration, especially in a contrasting manner such as this. The second verse is great, combining the nightclub setting with the animal inspiration in a wonderfully metaphorical manner. At times, I felt as if there were too many contrasting images or ideas that didn’t seem to fit these core themes (nightclub, birds/wolves) such as the crown of thorns, and seeking treasure. Honing in on your main ideas and making everything work together would have elevated this even more. 10. @XO_Life - “Body Make-Up” I’d like to preface this review by saying I don’t know a lot about this situation, and don’t wish or intend to cause any offence. The connection to your animal inspiration was very, very loose, and that’s being generous. The “snake” in question is referring to the definition of a treacherous or deceitful person rather than the animal itself. That aside, this had an opportunity to be a statement piece, but I don’t think it packed enough of an emotional punch, for want of a better term. You definitely have potential and I look forward to your next song! 11. @beatinglikeadrum - “Cock-a-doodle-do” Oh wow, trying to upstage Remmy’s iconic “Flowerbloom”, are we?! This was really something. I honestly really liked your verses, you integrated the bird references very well, and there were some genuinely funny lines. “You're acting like a peacock but you're lacking the feathers,” was great, and I legitimately screamed at, “I'll only think about you while reading a horoscope for the chinese zodiac signs.” I get the chorus, but I would have liked to see something more lyrically engaging, and I know you’re capable of that! The “Cola” reference tho, on point. 12. @camfuckingrockwell - “Bluebird” This was a little on the shorter side. To me, this reads like a fantastic starting point for a song! You have two verses, a chorus, and maybe a bridge or outro section. Your animal of choice was a good fit for the style of song you have gone for. With some expansion and rearrangement, this definitely has potential. 13. @TruGemini - “Whisked Away” I honestly don’t know if this is chaos or genius. Chaotic genius, perhaps? Writing a song that can be interpreted from the perspective of a humble fish or an arrested human was certainly not what I expected going into reading this entry, yet somehow you made it work. Part of me still thinks it’s a bit of a reach, but hey, it’s your art! Thank you for the creative concept. 14. @Jack! - “Teddy Bear” Similarly to TruGemini’s review, I don’t know if this is chaos or genius? Objectively speaking this was quite a fun read, even if I didn’t really “click” what the song was about until maybe halfway through since I’m definitely not so inclined. I’m here to judge entries however, not people, and this was a well-constructed, well-written, and highly inventive song. The animal inspiration was loose, but I can see the trail of thought clearly. Nice work! 15. @Augmented - “Night owl” Lack of inspiration, who? Or should I say hoot? I love owls! This was such a wonderfully constructed song from the way it seemed as if it was setting up to depict the owl and boy as unlikely friends/allies in the dead of night, to the revelation of the true meaning of the song. Being a night owl myself, as well as one who has snuck out after dark to experience similar rendezvous, I felt very connected to this piece. Just wonderful! 16. @Gavin. - “Stung” Ooh, another rather unique choice of animal, albeit a clever one. Scorpions definitely lend themselves to lyrical interpretation, I think! The prechorus was really wonderful here. I’d have liked to see longer verses that expanded on the metaphor more, the bridge was a great balance of metaphor and true meaning. Overall I think this was a really solid approach to the challenge. A good debut! 17. @Legend E - “Moving With The Speed of Light” I’m enjoying seeing all of these different animal inspirations and their clever lyrical interpretations. The cheetah/cheater angle was done well, reinforced by the fast life aspect also. While I can’t relate a lot to this piece, I consider it to be a well formulated and cleverly written work. The floor stained red by ignored feelings was a powerful image. An exciting start to this season for you! 18. @Achilles. - “Hibernate” I knew you were worried about nothing! This was another strong offering from you. The usage of “bear” in the non-animal sense throughout the verses was clever, and didn’t feel thrown in haphazardly. The chorus was simple, sweet, and effective. We’ve all wanted that before. I’m not sure if you were making a political statement in the second verse, but it definitely could be interpreted as a reference to deforestation and global warming alike, which is fantastic. A stellar outing from you this season. 19. @Euterpe - “Small Beginnings” This was very nice, perhaps almost too nice? Baby sea turtles have one of the most notoriously difficult journeys from sand to sea upon hatching, as even outlined in the video you linked. It almost feels remiss not to represent this? That said, this was a well-written piece from a more literal interpretation of the challenge and, for the lucky few who do make it, it is a nice ode to them. 20. @Temporal - “Halcyon’s Wings” Welcome back to the fold! I haven’t had the pleasure of reading any of your material in a long while, and I have to say it has been worth the wait. Your inspiration was beautiful, and the selection of the Halcyon birds complemented the word’s adjective meaning in a clever manner. The uncaged bird imagery in the second verse was another great moment for these two intersecting concepts. The closing couplet in the chorus really was just lovely. Thank you for submitting! 21. @Remmy - “THE ZOO” Oh wow, I definitely did not expect this angle from you!! /s In all seriousness, I think the break between seasons was kind to you, this was definitely your strongest sex bop since “Flowerbloom”. Like the aforementioned, it satisfied the challenge in an interesting way without compromising on quality, standout lyrics. Admittedly, not everything is sensational, but the Barrier Reef section sent me, and—I won’t lie—I ugly cry-laughed at, “Suckin' out my milk while I let out a moo”. 22. @JoeAg - “Tyto Alba” I really love owls. This was quite simply immaculate. Definitely my favourite song you’ve submitted for a Golden Hit tournament thus far, it resonated with me so intensely. It satisfied the challenge in a way that felt so effortless and natural and I almost got lost in the beauty and honesty of this song. I don’t really have much more to say other than thank you for writing this and sharing it with us.
ATRL Moderator Legend E Posted August 27, 2022 ATRL Moderator Posted August 27, 2022 oh cute, expected worse
Galah Posted August 27, 2022 Author Posted August 27, 2022 18 minutes ago, Aurora said: Hey, Hitmakers! Thank you all for supporting and submitting for Round 1 of Golden Hit: Season 2! It was a pleasure reading all of your songs again. Due to time constraints on my end, my reviews for R1 are going to be on the shorter side. Fortunately, I should be able to delve in a little deeper for R2! If there is anything in your review that you do not wish to have public (lyric excerpts, references to your material etc.) I will remove it upon request. Hide contents 1. @Kylie Jenner - “Eve” I enjoyed this a lot. Your animal of choice was clever, and complemented the well known tale of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden very naturally. The lyrics and images that referred to the snake, such as spitting words like venom, “cold blooded love”, and the latter part of the bridge were definitely highlights. Thank you for a strong start to Golden Hit: Season 2! 2. @Julia Fox - “Crying Birds” This was a hauntingly beautiful sentiment. It’s very true that the common folk’s understanding of avian communication is rather rudimentary, and what we may interpret as happy, carefree singing could be something else entirely. I also interpreted this piece as sort of a pessimist’s worldview; everything has been so sad since that special someone left, that even happy birds are interpreted as a negative. Thought-provoking! 3. @DatChickDoe - “Bite” I definitely wasn’t expecting this animal inspiration, but I’m pleasantly surprised. You could have gone down the water imagery angle, and while you did a little in the second verse, I like how you’ve committed to a dance club setting. The image of someone circling the dance floor like a shark circling its prey definitely worked! I’m glad you had fun, because I had fun reading it, and it was nice to see something like this from you this season. 4. @Hug - “Lilith” I certainly didn’t anticipate many overlapping animals this round, let alone the specific snake from the garden of Eden. Curious! This was an interesting offering from you, and I enjoyed the risk of some of the more archaic syntax. It was a definitely stylistic choice that I believe aided this piece. We love an equality anthem, and as far as they go, this was definitely a strong one. 5. @worldwide angel - “Eternal” Welcome to the tournament! This was a nice first offering from you, I didn’t pick up on your animal inspiration at first but upon a re-read, lyrics such as the first journey and “sturdy shield” made a lot more sense. You have a strong sense of rhythm and, I imagine, melody. Lyrically, I think there was definitely more room for opportunity to expand on some of those comparisons between daydreaming in the shower and a turtle in a waterfall, and creating some interesting, deep metaphors while retaining all of that lovely imagery. Well done! 6. @Allday - “Animal For You” I will update this review once your song is accessible. 7. @Better Mistakes - “Don't Leave My Life” I didn’t pick up on the animal inspiration until I read your other information section, which in reality just means your song could be interpreted in a number of different ways. I think for this specific challenge, it would have been strengthened by a handful of lyrics that made it clear it was from a pet’s perspective amongst the more ambiguous and all-applicable lyricism. The bridge could have been that perfect “a-ha” moment where any misconceptions that the song is from the point of view of a person rather than an animal are cleared up. 8. @hurricane326 - “I Walk Alone” This was fantastic! Being an uncultured Australian, I hadn’t actually heard of the Jersey Devil, so that was certainly an eye-opening read. After a quick education from the University of Wikipedia, I can say you’ve done a wonderful effort to integrate so many details into this piece, yet when reading it unaware of these details, it still translates as an epic, almost Nordic folk type song. Your unique style and poetic aptitude served you well here, and this was a strong debut for you this season. 9. @EpicSongFan - “Sweet Escape” Birds and wolves are definitely solid choices for inspiration, especially in a contrasting manner such as this. The second verse is great, combining the nightclub setting with the animal inspiration in a wonderfully metaphorical manner. At times, I felt as if there were too many contrasting images or ideas that didn’t seem to fit these core themes (nightclub, birds/wolves) such as the crown of thorns, and seeking treasure. Honing in on your main ideas and making everything work together would have elevated this even more. 10. @XO_Life - “Body Make-Up” I’d like to preface this review by saying I don’t know a lot about this situation, and don’t wish or intend to cause any offence. The connection to your animal inspiration was very, very loose, and that’s being generous. The “snake” in question is referring to the definition of a treacherous or deceitful person rather than the animal itself. That aside, this had an opportunity to be a statement piece, but I don’t think it packed enough of an emotional punch, for want of a better term. You definitely have potential and I look forward to your next song! 11. @beatinglikeadrum - “Cock-a-doodle-do” Oh wow, trying to upstage Remmy’s iconic “Flowerbloom”, are we?! This was really something. I honestly really liked your verses, you integrated the bird references very well, and there were some genuinely funny lines. “You're acting like a peacock but you're lacking the feathers,” was great, and I legitimately screamed at, “I'll only think about you while reading a horoscope for the chinese zodiac signs.” I get the chorus, but I would have liked to see something more lyrically engaging, and I know you’re capable of that! The “Cola” reference tho, on point. 12. @camfuckingrockwell - “Bluebird” This was a little on the shorter side. To me, this reads like a fantastic starting point for a song! You have two verses, a chorus, and maybe a bridge or outro section. Your animal of choice was a good fit for the style of song you have gone for. With some expansion and rearrangement, this definitely has potential. 13. @TruGemini - “Whisked Away” I honestly don’t know if this is chaos or genius. Chaotic genius, perhaps? Writing a song that can be interpreted from the perspective of a humble fish or an arrested human was certainly not what I expected going into reading this entry, yet somehow you made it work. Part of me still thinks it’s a bit of a reach, but hey, it’s your art! Thank you for the creative concept. 14. @Jack! - “Teddy Bear” Similarly to TruGemini’s review, I don’t know if this is chaos or genius? Objectively speaking this was quite a fun read, even if I didn’t really “click” what the song was about until maybe halfway through since I’m definitely not so inclined. I’m here to judge entries however, not people, and this was a well-constructed, well-written, and highly inventive song. The animal inspiration was loose, but I can see the trail of thought clearly. Nice work! 15. @Augmented - “Night owl” Lack of inspiration, who? Or should I say hoot? I love owls! This was such a wonderfully constructed song from the way it seemed as if it was setting up to depict the owl and boy as unlikely friends/allies in the dead of night, to the revelation of the true meaning of the song. Being a night owl myself, as well as one who has snuck out after dark to experience similar rendezvous, I felt very connected to this piece. Just wonderful! 16. @Gavin. - “Stung” Ooh, another rather unique choice of animal, albeit a clever one. Scorpions definitely lend themselves to lyrical interpretation, I think! The prechorus was really wonderful here. I’d have liked to see longer verses that expanded on the metaphor more, the bridge was a great balance of metaphor and true meaning. Overall I think this was a really solid approach to the challenge. A good debut! 17. @Legend E - “Moving With The Speed of Light” I’m enjoying seeing all of these different animal inspirations and their clever lyrical interpretations. The cheetah/cheater angle was done well, reinforced by the fast life aspect also. While I can’t relate a lot to this piece, I consider it to be a well formulated and cleverly written work. The floor stained red by ignored feelings was a powerful image. An exciting start to this season for you! 18. @Achilles. - “Hibernate” I knew you were worried about nothing! This was another strong offering from you. The usage of “bear” in the non-animal sense throughout the verses was clever, and didn’t feel thrown in haphazardly. The chorus was simple, sweet, and effective. We’ve all wanted that before. I’m not sure if you were making a political statement in the second verse, but it definitely could be interpreted as a reference to deforestation and global warming alike, which is fantastic. A stellar outing from you this season. 19. @Euterpe - “Small Beginnings” This was very nice, perhaps almost too nice? Baby sea turtles have one of the most notoriously difficult journeys from sand to sea upon hatching, as even outlined in the video you linked. It almost feels remiss not to represent this? That said, this was a well-written piece from a more literal interpretation of the challenge and, for the lucky few who do make it, it is a nice ode to them. 20. @Temporal - “Halcyon’s Wings” Welcome back to the fold! I haven’t had the pleasure of reading any of your material in a long while, and I have to say it has been worth the wait. Your inspiration was beautiful, and the selection of the Halcyon birds complemented the word’s adjective meaning in a clever manner. The uncaged bird imagery in the second verse was another great moment for these two intersecting concepts. The closing couplet in the chorus really was just lovely. Thank you for submitting! 21. @Remmy - “THE ZOO” Oh wow, I definitely did not expect this angle from you!! /s In all seriousness, I think the break between seasons was kind to you, this was definitely your strongest sex bop since “Flowerbloom”. Like the aforementioned, it satisfied the challenge in an interesting way without compromising on quality, standout lyrics. Admittedly, not everything is sensational, but the Barrier Reef section sent me, and—I won’t lie—I ugly cry-laughed at, “Suckin' out my milk while I let out a moo”. 22. @JoeAg - “Tyto Alba” I really love owls. This was quite simply immaculate. Definitely my favourite song you’ve submitted for a Golden Hit tournament thus far, it resonated with me so intensely. It satisfied the challenge in a way that felt so effortless and natural and I almost got lost in the beauty and honesty of this song. I don’t really have much more to say other than thank you for writing this and sharing it with us. Repost for the new page!
Jack! Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 (edited) 19 minutes ago, Aurora said: Hey, Hitmakers! Thank you all for supporting and submitting for Round 1 of Golden Hit: Season 2! It was a pleasure reading all of your songs again. Due to time constraints on my end, my reviews for R1 are going to be on the shorter side. Fortunately, I should be able to delve in a little deeper for R2! If there is anything in your review that you do not wish to have public (lyric excerpts, references to your material etc.) I will remove it upon request. Reveal hidden contents 1. @Kylie Jenner - “Eve” I enjoyed this a lot. Your animal of choice was clever, and complemented the well known tale of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden very naturally. The lyrics and images that referred to the snake, such as spitting words like venom, “cold blooded love”, and the latter part of the bridge were definitely highlights. Thank you for a strong start to Golden Hit: Season 2! 2. @Julia Fox - “Crying Birds” This was a hauntingly beautiful sentiment. It’s very true that the common folk’s understanding of avian communication is rather rudimentary, and what we may interpret as happy, carefree singing could be something else entirely. I also interpreted this piece as sort of a pessimist’s worldview; everything has been so sad since that special someone left, that even happy birds are interpreted as a negative. Thought-provoking! 3. @DatChickDoe - “Bite” I definitely wasn’t expecting this animal inspiration, but I’m pleasantly surprised. You could have gone down the water imagery angle, and while you did a little in the second verse, I like how you’ve committed to a dance club setting. The image of someone circling the dance floor like a shark circling its prey definitely worked! I’m glad you had fun, because I had fun reading it, and it was nice to see something like this from you this season. 4. @Hug - “Lilith” I certainly didn’t anticipate many overlapping animals this round, let alone the specific snake from the garden of Eden. Curious! This was an interesting offering from you, and I enjoyed the risk of some of the more archaic syntax. It was a definitely stylistic choice that I believe aided this piece. We love an equality anthem, and as far as they go, this was definitely a strong one. 5. @worldwide angel - “Eternal” Welcome to the tournament! This was a nice first offering from you, I didn’t pick up on your animal inspiration at first but upon a re-read, lyrics such as the first journey and “sturdy shield” made a lot more sense. You have a strong sense of rhythm and, I imagine, melody. Lyrically, I think there was definitely more room for opportunity to expand on some of those comparisons between daydreaming in the shower and a turtle in a waterfall, and creating some interesting, deep metaphors while retaining all of that lovely imagery. Well done! 6. @Allday - “Animal For You” I will update this review once your song is accessible. 7. @Better Mistakes - “Don't Leave My Life” I didn’t pick up on the animal inspiration until I read your other information section, which in reality just means your song could be interpreted in a number of different ways. I think for this specific challenge, it would have been strengthened by a handful of lyrics that made it clear it was from a pet’s perspective amongst the more ambiguous and all-applicable lyricism. The bridge could have been that perfect “a-ha” moment where any misconceptions that the song is from the point of view of a person rather than an animal are cleared up. 8. @hurricane326 - “I Walk Alone” This was fantastic! Being an uncultured Australian, I hadn’t actually heard of the Jersey Devil, so that was certainly an eye-opening read. After a quick education from the University of Wikipedia, I can say you’ve done a wonderful effort to integrate so many details into this piece, yet when reading it unaware of these details, it still translates as an epic, almost Nordic folk type song. Your unique style and poetic aptitude served you well here, and this was a strong debut for you this season. 9. @EpicSongFan - “Sweet Escape” Birds and wolves are definitely solid choices for inspiration, especially in a contrasting manner such as this. The second verse is great, combining the nightclub setting with the animal inspiration in a wonderfully metaphorical manner. At times, I felt as if there were too many contrasting images or ideas that didn’t seem to fit these core themes (nightclub, birds/wolves) such as the crown of thorns, and seeking treasure. Honing in on your main ideas and making everything work together would have elevated this even more. 10. @XO_Life - “Body Make-Up” I’d like to preface this review by saying I don’t know a lot about this situation, and don’t wish or intend to cause any offence. The connection to your animal inspiration was very, very loose, and that’s being generous. The “snake” in question is referring to the definition of a treacherous or deceitful person rather than the animal itself. That aside, this had an opportunity to be a statement piece, but I don’t think it packed enough of an emotional punch, for want of a better term. You definitely have potential and I look forward to your next song! 11. @beatinglikeadrum - “Cock-a-doodle-do” Oh wow, trying to upstage Remmy’s iconic “Flowerbloom”, are we?! This was really something. I honestly really liked your verses, you integrated the bird references very well, and there were some genuinely funny lines. “You're acting like a peacock but you're lacking the feathers,” was great, and I legitimately screamed at, “I'll only think about you while reading a horoscope for the chinese zodiac signs.” I get the chorus, but I would have liked to see something more lyrically engaging, and I know you’re capable of that! The “Cola” reference tho, on point. 12. @camfuckingrockwell - “Bluebird” This was a little on the shorter side. To me, this reads like a fantastic starting point for a song! You have two verses, a chorus, and maybe a bridge or outro section. Your animal of choice was a good fit for the style of song you have gone for. With some expansion and rearrangement, this definitely has potential. 13. @TruGemini - “Whisked Away” I honestly don’t know if this is chaos or genius. Chaotic genius, perhaps? Writing a song that can be interpreted from the perspective of a humble fish or an arrested human was certainly not what I expected going into reading this entry, yet somehow you made it work. Part of me still thinks it’s a bit of a reach, but hey, it’s your art! Thank you for the creative concept. 14. @Jack! - “Teddy Bear” Similarly to TruGemini’s review, I don’t know if this is chaos or genius? Objectively speaking this was quite a fun read, even if I didn’t really “click” what the song was about until maybe halfway through since I’m definitely not so inclined. I’m here to judge entries however, not people, and this was a well-constructed, well-written, and highly inventive song. The animal inspiration was loose, but I can see the trail of thought clearly. Nice work! 15. @Augmented - “Night owl” Lack of inspiration, who? Or should I say hoot? I love owls! This was such a wonderfully constructed song from the way it seemed as if it was setting up to depict the owl and boy as unlikely friends/allies in the dead of night, to the revelation of the true meaning of the song. Being a night owl myself, as well as one who has snuck out after dark to experience similar rendezvous, I felt very connected to this piece. Just wonderful! 16. @Gavin. - “Stung” Ooh, another rather unique choice of animal, albeit a clever one. Scorpions definitely lend themselves to lyrical interpretation, I think! The prechorus was really wonderful here. I’d have liked to see longer verses that expanded on the metaphor more, the bridge was a great balance of metaphor and true meaning. Overall I think this was a really solid approach to the challenge. A good debut! 17. @Legend E - “Moving With The Speed of Light” I’m enjoying seeing all of these different animal inspirations and their clever lyrical interpretations. The cheetah/cheater angle was done well, reinforced by the fast life aspect also. While I can’t relate a lot to this piece, I consider it to be a well formulated and cleverly written work. The floor stained red by ignored feelings was a powerful image. An exciting start to this season for you! 18. @Achilles. - “Hibernate” I knew you were worried about nothing! This was another strong offering from you. The usage of “bear” in the non-animal sense throughout the verses was clever, and didn’t feel thrown in haphazardly. The chorus was simple, sweet, and effective. We’ve all wanted that before. I’m not sure if you were making a political statement in the second verse, but it definitely could be interpreted as a reference to deforestation and global warming alike, which is fantastic. A stellar outing from you this season. 19. @Euterpe - “Small Beginnings” This was very nice, perhaps almost too nice? Baby sea turtles have one of the most notoriously difficult journeys from sand to sea upon hatching, as even outlined in the video you linked. It almost feels remiss not to represent this? That said, this was a well-written piece from a more literal interpretation of the challenge and, for the lucky few who do make it, it is a nice ode to them. 20. @Temporal - “Halcyon’s Wings” Welcome back to the fold! I haven’t had the pleasure of reading any of your material in a long while, and I have to say it has been worth the wait. Your inspiration was beautiful, and the selection of the Halcyon birds complemented the word’s adjective meaning in a clever manner. The uncaged bird imagery in the second verse was another great moment for these two intersecting concepts. The closing couplet in the chorus really was just lovely. Thank you for submitting! 21. @Remmy - “THE ZOO” Oh wow, I definitely did not expect this angle from you!! /s In all seriousness, I think the break between seasons was kind to you, this was definitely your strongest sex bop since “Flowerbloom”. Like the aforementioned, it satisfied the challenge in an interesting way without compromising on quality, standout lyrics. Admittedly, not everything is sensational, but the Barrier Reef section sent me, and—I won’t lie—I ugly cry-laughed at, “Suckin' out my milk while I let out a moo”. 22. @JoeAg - “Tyto Alba” I really love owls. This was quite simply immaculate. Definitely my favourite song you’ve submitted for a Golden Hit tournament thus far, it resonated with me so intensely. It satisfied the challenge in a way that felt so effortless and natural and I almost got lost in the beauty and honesty of this song. I don’t really have much more to say other than thank you for writing this and sharing it with us. Just to clarify if I’m not that way inclined of what my lyrics were getting at either. I maybe didn’t explain as well as I should have in the comments section of the submission page but a lot of my writing is character based. Writing from a fake perspective or creating false narratives to find inspiration. It’s all in good fun even if it’s with a darker tone. Edited August 27, 2022 by Jack!
Remmy Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 Ayyy period The prompt basically invited me to do it like this so I had to! Plus I might as well get a sex bop out of the way since I won't be participating in every round, and it's how I started S1. I was slightly uninspired + rushing myself so I can understand that every line didn't hit "I ugly cry-laughed at, “Suckin' out my milk while I let out a moo”." also here's my song if anyone wants to read "THE ZOO" [verse 1/intro] Freedom in the fields That's all that I want Can't stand this captivity When will someone rescue me? Free just like a cheetah Running under the sun I guess this is the moment Where I just come undone... [beat switches up] [verse 2] Uncaged, rip my chastity belt off This little piggy want 5 fingers down my hole I'm like a bird, b*tch I just left the nest So many big beasts around me, I'm losing all control Oh wow, oh my, good God, good grief Bed end up wetter than the Barrier Reef And the smell's fishy too, like tuna mixed with glue I know you want this tasty cod, all inside of you Oh my, oh wow, good grief, good God He can be my little s*xy arthropod Legs are shakin' and my d*ck's all throbbed And I got a back that's begging to be clawed [chorus] Come to my bedroom, get a ticket to the zoo Don't be alarmed if there's a long queue P*ssy pink, red meat, it takes some time to chew But you gnaw on the beef like rent's past due Come to my bedroom, get a ticket to the zoo Suckin' out my milk while I let out a moo Fat free and organic, yeah you already knew I don't care who sees, I bet they'll love the view [verse 3] I'm the freakiest b*tch in my genus You'll understand once you see this p*nis Thick and wide, curved at an angle It bent a little bit after getting strangled I look over, I can tell the rabbits are jealous And they wish their gooch could be this hairless Got a full audience, but we're not embarrassed Life expectancy's low, so my time is precious Gonna make so many kids (so we'll never be endangered) You'll be the perfect dad ('cause you're so good-natured) This juice that I have (is best when it's savored) The monkeys gave me a c*ndom... banana flavored! [chorus] Come to my bedroom, get a ticket to the zoo Don't be alarmed if there's a long queue P*ssy pink, red meat, it takes some time to chew But you gnaw on the beef like rent's past due Come to my bedroom, get a ticket to the zoo Suckin' out my milk while I let out a moo Fat free and organic, yeah you already knew I don't care who sees, I bet they'll love the view [outro] This c*ck like a rooster, wake you up in the mornin' Open your eyes, then we get the c*m pourin' Ain't got no rabies but you keep my mouth foamin' F*ck 50 times a week, check the CCTV recordin'
Julia Fox Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 5 minutes ago, Remmy said: Ayyy period The prompt basically invited me to do it like this so I had to! Plus I might as well get a sex bop out of the way since I won't be participating in every round, and it's how I started S1. I was slightly uninspired + rushing myself so I can understand that every line didn't hit "I ugly cry-laughed at, “Suckin' out my milk while I let out a moo”." also here's my song if anyone wants to read Hide contents [verse 1/intro] Freedom in the fields That's all that I want Can't stand this captivity When will someone rescue me? Free just like a cheetah Running under the sun I guess this is the moment Where I just come undone... [beat switches up] [verse 2] Uncaged, rip my chastity belt off This little piggy want 5 fingers down my hole I'm like a bird, b*tch I just left the nest So many big beasts around me, I'm losing all control Oh wow, oh my, good God, good grief Bed end up wetter than the Barrier Reef And the smell's fishy too, like tuna mixed with glue I know you want this tasty cod, all inside of you Oh my, oh wow, good grief, good God He can be my little s*xy arthropod Legs are shakin' and my d*ck's all throbbed And I got a back that's begging to be clawed [chorus] Come to my bedroom, get a ticket to the zoo Don't be alarmed if there's a long queue P*ssy pink, red meat, it takes some time to chew But you gnaw on the beef like rent's past due Come to my bedroom, get a ticket to the zoo Suckin' out my milk while I let out a moo Fat free and organic, yeah you already knew I don't care who sees, I bet they'll love the view [verse 3] I'm the freakiest b*tch in my genus You'll understand once you see this p*nis Thick and wide, curved at an angle It bent a little bit after getting strangled I look over, I can tell the rabbits are jealous And they wish their gooch could be this hairless Got a full audience, but we're not embarrassed Life expectancy's low, so my time is precious Gonna make so many kids (so we'll never be endangered) You'll be the perfect dad ('cause you're so good-natured) This juice that I have (is best when it's savored) The monkeys gave me a c*ndom... banana flavored! [chorus] Come to my bedroom, get a ticket to the zoo Don't be alarmed if there's a long queue P*ssy pink, red meat, it takes some time to chew But you gnaw on the beef like rent's past due Come to my bedroom, get a ticket to the zoo Suckin' out my milk while I let out a moo Fat free and organic, yeah you already knew I don't care who sees, I bet they'll love the view [outro] This c*ck like a rooster, wake you up in the mornin' Open your eyes, then we get the c*m pourin' Ain't got no rabies but you keep my mouth foamin' F*ck 50 times a week, check the CCTV recordin' Cupcakke is SHAKIN WHAT A BOWP
Gavin. Posted August 27, 2022 Posted August 27, 2022 53 minutes ago, Aurora said: Hide contents 16. @Gavin. - “Stung” Ooh, another rather unique choice of animal, albeit a clever one. Scorpions definitely lend themselves to lyrical interpretation, I think! The prechorus was really wonderful here. I’d have liked to see longer verses that expanded on the metaphor more, the bridge was a great balance of metaphor and true meaning. Overall I think this was a really solid approach to the challenge. A good debut! Thank you so much! Yeah I will definitely agree about the verses needing to be a biT longer and have more going on.
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