Sweet Sexy Savage Posted July 20, 2022 Share Posted July 20, 2022 To see where my low self esteem issues comes from, I’d say a lot of it comes from childhood trauma + neglect throughout my adolescent and teenage years. To this day, I still have issues with believing that I could accomplish long term goals on my own. I’m 22 and I’ve been telling my family that I’ll be taking my permit test, but I’m always lagging due to my fears of being on the road. My sister tells me that I need to stop making excuses and to learn, but idk… i still have a lot to figure out Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CristianGarcia Posted July 20, 2022 Share Posted July 20, 2022 You’re at the age where you put a lot of pressure on yourself. 21-25 After that you’re going to wish you lived life more carefree and didn’t stress yourself out as much. Things will happen when they should. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProudLBS Posted July 20, 2022 Share Posted July 20, 2022 You don’t. You just realize you’re a bad ***** and stop paying attention to them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovecatt Posted July 20, 2022 Share Posted July 20, 2022 Running Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shookspeare Posted July 20, 2022 Share Posted July 20, 2022 exercise, therapy, quitting drinking, and prioritizing sleep did wonders for me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
izzyinsane Posted July 20, 2022 Share Posted July 20, 2022 You have to learn how to control your mind. Stop thinking negatively. You are worthy. We are all worthy of a good life. You're not broke and you don't need fixing. Remember you can do whatever you want to in life. Stop comparing yourself to others, you have your own journey in life and everyone else has theirs. You choose how you want to live your life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joyride Posted July 20, 2022 Share Posted July 20, 2022 if you're not ready just give it more time. I think learning and living at your own pace is what will work best for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hallucinate Posted July 20, 2022 Share Posted July 20, 2022 by ignoring it that’s what i do at least Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TouchinFree Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 I feel you on so many levels. But try and literally leave it in the past. Focus on the positives of each milestone. If you drive that means you'll be more independent, you'll accomplish more goals because you'll literally drive yourself to places and overall personal growth. Now if you feel anxious and nervous , try and find out why? . Is it the road ? Lots of people with anxiety are excellent drivers . So , have more one on one lessons with driving instructors. And work around the obstacles. Write down how to avoid being anxious inthe future when driving. Just remember that past trauma does affect certain goals . But we're mostly stuck because we think it is affecting us when in reality driving has no connection with your past trauma . And finally , driving is an amazing blessing. You'll feel so in control and its so therapeutic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EnigmaticAndroid Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 For me, it's been a lot of reinforcing the fact that I DO deserve things DO deserve to put the work into being the best version of myself. Using small successes and wins to help fuel my motivation for bigger goals has helped to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abel Minaj Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 Positive affirmations and understanding who you are not what you aren't Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bad guy Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 Work out and live in the present. There is nothing you can do to change the past so there's no point in dwelling over it either. As far as driving goes, just take the test. If you fail who cares, you can retake it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zasderfght Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 2 hours ago, Sweet Sexy Savage said: To see where my low self esteem issues comes from, I’d say a lot of it comes from childhood trauma + neglect throughout my adolescent and teenage years. To this day, I still have issues with believing that I could accomplish long term goals on my own. I’m 22 and I’ve been telling my family that I’ll be taking my permit test, but I’m always lagging due to my fears of being on the road. My sister tells me that I need to stop making excuses and to learn, but idk… i still have a lot to figure out As someone who didn't drive a car independently until I was 24, and someone who was too anxious to drive before 24, here is my advice: just do it. I know, easier said than done. But seriously. Just ask your mom (or whomever will drive with you/show you how to drive), and ask them to allow you to drive ANYWHERE. Family member has to do groceries? Drive them to the grocery store and back. You have to go to work? Drive with a family member to work. Then drive your family member back. You won't get your permit and/or license just thinking about it. You have to think about it, and then DO it. Driving seems really anxiety-inducing because you hear about car accidents, or you might feel like it's "too late." Let me tell you that the majority of people waiting for the driving test looked twice my age, at least. Also, like other posters said here, you're still at that age where you're learning to be independent, and part of that is actually not renting/owning property, getting a "grown-up" job, paying bills, being a car-owner (although, that's part of it), but it's learning to tune out the noise and realize, at the end of the day, this is your life you have to live. No one else's. People can offer their opinions, but you drive the bus. Will you listen to every criticism thrown your way? No. And 9 times out of 10, if people SERIOUSLY have it out for you, they themselves are dissatisfied with life, and the only way THEY can be happy is dragging you down. And that is a HORRIBLE life to live. You got this, young grasshopper! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WildOne Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 Go to therapy Watch How To Change Your Mind on Netflix and read the book Take psychedelics, ideally in the vicinity of someone sober whom you have unwavering trust in or, if you can afford it, under the supervision of a Ketamine or MDMA licensed therapist Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ricanaire Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 7 minutes ago, WildOne said: Go to therapy Watch How To Change Your Mind on Netflix and read the book Take psychedelics, ideally in the vicinity of someone sober whom you have unwavering trust in or, if you can afford it, under the supervision of a Ketamine or MDMA licensed therapist im really interested in taking psychedelics but im scared. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Sexy Savage Posted July 21, 2022 Author Share Posted July 21, 2022 Thank you all for your guys’ advice, and you guys are right. I am ultimately the one in control of my life, and I’m not gonna let anymore trauma or anything from the past affect my long term goals. It’s one life and I want the best of it. Thanks again Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caleb. Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 For every single negative thing you criticize yourself for, counter that with three positive things you appreciate about you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Comedor Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 Life is too good but unfortunately too short, don’t waste time putting yourself down, go chase the things you want in life and have fun in the process. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WildOne Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 5 hours ago, Ricanaire said: im really interested in taking psychedelics but im scared. That’s natural, nothing you can experience sober can truly prepare you for a psychedelic trip. That said, these drugs are popular for a reason and “bad trips” are really quite rare. I highly highly recommend How To Change Your Mind as a fantastic way to learn about psychedelics in an unbiased way, their history, and what is achievable through their use; from feeling a little funny and childlike to healing deep deep trauma and allowing you to access repressed emotions in a safe way. the closest you can come to “preparing” or trying to understand what a big trip is like is to start with a small dose a few times to dip your feet in the water. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alldeezy Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 Im in the same boat! been rejected, knocked back by everything and stepped back and hide in my house day in and day out! just hope your self esteem isnt as bad as mine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bicassie Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 8 hours ago, Sweet Sexy Savage said: To see where my low self esteem issues comes from, I’d say a lot of it comes from childhood trauma + neglect throughout my adolescent and teenage years. To this day, I still have issues with believing that I could accomplish long term goals on my own. I’m 22 and I’ve been telling my family that I’ll be taking my permit test, but I’m always lagging due to my fears of being on the road. My sister tells me that I need to stop making excuses and to learn, but idk… i still have a lot to figure out This is word for word my situation aswell Even the age lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoctorIce Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 (edited) Shrooooms. Do some research and see if it's for you. Edited July 21, 2022 by DoctorIce Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katara Posted July 21, 2022 Share Posted July 21, 2022 Fake it till you make it. You have to convince yourself that you have self esteem and confidence over and over again. With time you'll start to believe your own "lies" (which in fact become reality) and you'll be much more content and secure with yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theshigo Washidu Posted July 22, 2022 Share Posted July 22, 2022 Therapy. As for the driving test, do it when you're ready. There is no rush. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G.U.Y_Del_Rey Posted July 23, 2022 Share Posted July 23, 2022 Does therapy actually work? I feel like they'd just tell you the same cliched "love yourself" stuff that your mom could tell you for free. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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