celeb news Harry defends queerbaiting

[lovedaddy]

8 minutes ago, Protocol said:

Stop right there. This isn’t a “queer” issue. I don’t know what that word means anymore. For some people it means whatever they want it to mean. I don’t know what queer aesthetics are either.

 

But what this IS about, is a man being asked if he is attracted to other men. This is a gay/bi issue. This is about how gay/bi men a.k.a. men attracted to other men, are perceived by society.
 

You are a woman. You do not know what it’s like to be a gay/bi man, you do not know what it is like to be a man who is attracted to other men. You do not know what it is like to be someone like that and how society treats you. The fact that you say sexuality is invisible tells me everything. Sexuality stops being invisible the second you hold another man’s hand in public.
 

Your two cents are not needed. Stay out of gay and bi men’s business.

all of THIS

[TheCheshireCat]

In 4-5 years I'll bet he will be married to a cis woman with a child and will gradually distance himself from all this gender/sexuality talk.

[Protocol]

7 minutes ago, More Than A Melody said:

Queer men are not more oppressed than queer women. What the hell are you saying? You're not a minority ABOVE queer women. We face some of the same issues than you, some worse, some less. You have no right to silence my opinion. Don't ever quote me again.

No one is saying that someone is more oppressed than anyone else. That’s your problem if you understood that from my post. Of course there are similar issues. But there are also very different issues, and from your post it’s clear you don’t understand that at all. This is an issue that pertains to gay and bisexual men because we are viewed in a very particular way by society and treated in a very particular way, and the pressure is Harry is facing as a big star to be able to publicly say that he is attracted to other men is very different from what women entertainers face.

 

Of course there are other issues when it comes to women that men do not face, but I am not going into a thread about whether or not Kristen Stewart should’ve come out sooner and trying to give my two cents and trying to talk over lesbian and bisexual women the way you are doing in this thread to gay and bisexual men.
 

There’s a reason we have a grand total of one single openly same sex attracted male big star in the last decade. And yes I will quote you as much as I want, because this is a public forum, and I am educated and intelligent when it comes to this topic. Just because you cannot stand being told that you are wrong doesn’t mean that I’m going to shut up.

 

[Nicholai]

He is keeping the "i like men too" card for when he flops in the future.

[Exzime.]

Nothing worse than people who say "no labels"  the amount of actual straight men that I meet saying this irl to gain attention.

[Protocol]

8 minutes ago, Communion said:

By this logic, everyone is assumed to have the capacity to be attracted to the same gender....which is horrifically short-sighted and removed from the reality of how peopoe experience sexualoty. 

 

One can live free of labels; they cannot live free of the reality of their attraction. 

Thank you, you put this so eloquently.

 

I also want to say, because I can feel this is getting heated in this thread, at the end of the day the reason we’re even having this conversation is because we live in a homophobic world where the standard and the default is man and woman and anything else has to be given special labels, questioned, treated as suspect. 
 

So I don’t want to fight with anybody @More Than A Melody and I apologize if I was a bit short because I do think that at the end of the day all of us would like to live in a world where we aren’t judged for our sexuality, but we live in a world where that’s not the case, and there are issues of media or presentation and financial interests and pressures that people experience as a result of that. Harry just seems to be caught up in the middle of it.

[Beyonnaise]

The thing that annoys me over this whole situation doesn't even really have to do with Harry. It's that actual out and proud gay artists would never get the level of adoration and fervent cult-like fan support that he does. His stans are so annoying acting like him wearing glitter sometimes is incinerating gender norms. Meanwhile if Troye Sivan wore the same thing those same exact people (let's be real who they are, obnoxious straight girls) would just be like "lol he's such a twink" or "aw that's cute".

[Harry]

where’s this energy when the camera isn’t rolling tho

[東京.]

I completely agree. Labels are so restrictive and unnecessary. Humans like humans, so what. The end. 

[Sugden]

Except he is only dates white skinny models and tries to sell his image as king of diversity and queerness, he is basically making money off cosplaying as queer person.

I don't see how that moves anything foward

[Bloo]

4 minutes ago, Beyonnaise said:

The thing that annoys me over this whole situation doesn't even really have to do with Harry. It's that actual out and proud gay artists would never get the level of adoration and fervent cult-like fan support that he does. His stans are so annoying acting like him wearing glitter sometimes is incinerating gender norms. Meanwhile if Troye Sivan wore the same thing those same exact people (let's be real who they are, obnoxious straight girls) would just be like "lol he's such a twink" or "aw that's cute".

I think this is my problem. I don't really care about Harry's sexual orientation or how he presents himself. I think the bigger issue is that he gets a lot of praise for doing things queer artists did decades ago. There should be some recognition for those artists that were harassed, systematically oppressed, etc. Beyond that, I haven't cared to waste much time thinking about Harry Styles.

[Beyonnaise]

18 minutes ago, Communion said:

By this logic, everyone is assumed to have the capacity to be attracted to the same gender....which is horrifically short-sighted and removed from the reality of how peopoe experience sexualoty. 

 

One can live free of labels; they cannot live free of the reality of their attraction. 

 

This is true. A straight guy can wear chalky nail polish or make a TikTok cuddling with his other straight friend and play into the "hmm idk i don't care about labels lol" thing, but he will never understand how it actually feels to be gay. To constantly have to come out to new acquaintances and co-workers. To hear your family discussing how everyone's getting straight-married and having babies and feeling uncomfortable. To getting stared at just sitting at a restaurant with your boyfriend. You might not care about your label, but that doesn't matter, the world does and it treats you as more normal because you don't operate as a gay man.

Edited April 26, 2022 by Beyonnaise

[More Than A Melody]

20 minutes ago, Protocol said:

No one is saying that someone is more oppressed than anyone else. That’s your problem if you understood that from my post. Of course there are similar issues. But there are also very different issues, and from your post it’s clear you don’t understand that at all. This is an issue that pertains to gay and bisexual men because we are viewed in a very particular way by society and treated in a very particular way, and the pressure is Harry is facing as a big star to be able to publicly say that he is attracted to other men is very different from women.
 

There’s a reason we have a grand total of one single openly same sex attracted male big star in the last decade. And yes I will quote you as much as I want, because this is a public forum, and I am educated and intelligent when it comes to this topic.

You're not treated any differently than we are. We are violently killed and raped for our sexuality as well. We are treated like we're promiscuous if we're bisexual and like we need to be fixed if we're lesbians. We're ousted from society and excommunicated from our families. This whole message is a freaking mess of putting down other people's experiences and having zero empathy.

 

I don't want to argue about this subject with someone SO reductive and SO closed minded. I have no interest in your opinion, which is why I ignored your multiple ridiculous comments in this thread. "The only options are that he's baiting or he's forced to stay in the closet" it's so freaking absurd I don't have words. He can't express himself artistically unless he's willing to tell everyone where he puts his d*ck? Because he doesn't do it with women... he's yet to open up about his relationships with women. All you see are media articles about it and his art.

 

Yes, he wrote explicit songs about sex with women. He also wrote explicit songs about sex with men. Medicine wasn't on the album because it didn't fit, sonically. Or maybe he wasn't ready for the can of worms that song would open too, but if you heard the demo that leaked you'll realize it really didn't fit with the rest of the album. But he could have written 100% songs about women and zero about men and it wouldn't detract anything from the fact that he doesn't want to divulge his sexuality... because guess what? People can be completely aware of their sexuality without ever having had experience with same sex relationships.

 

Do you think straight people don't know they're straight until they have sex? I'm bisexual. I didn't have any experience with women until recently, yet I knew I was bisexual since I was a teenager. How do you know Harry didn't come to terms with his sexuality a couple of years ago and simply hasn't had much experience with men? I'm not saying this is the case, I'm presenting you the options you chose to completely ignore exist.

 

How do you know, for instance, that he hasn't had multiple hookups with men but nothing meaningful worth to write about? How? How do you know it? You don't. You're assuming he's either straight or has vast experience with men and doesn't want to say it. The fact that I have to spell it out has got to be one of the most absurd things ever.

 

He experienced a lot of trauma around his sex life, from entitled media and from entitled fans. From 16 to 22 he wasn't in charge of what was written about him in any way, it wasn't until he went solo that he got more of a say of what interviewers could ask him, and even then he obviously can't control what people assume about his life.

 

If he doesn't want to sit down and package the whole thing for your consumption he doesn't have to. And if that bothers you, you can mute him on Spotify and be done with it.

 

You are not entitled to answers about someone else's personal life. You are not entitled to anything. He's a musician. Either buy his music or don't. You don't get to demand him say something or else... what are you even trying to do? The idea that unless he says he likes d*ck he needs to stop wearing flashy outfits is also so ridiculous I don't have words.

 

Queer aesthetic is not a thing. Get it through. You are not owed representation above someone else's well being and mental health.

Edited April 26, 2022 by More Than A Melody

[More Than A Melody]

7 minutes ago, Beyonnaise said:

The thing that annoys me over this whole situation doesn't even really have to do with Harry. It's that actual out and proud gay artists would never get the level of adoration and fervent cult-like fan support that he does. His stans are so annoying acting like him wearing glitter sometimes is incinerating gender norms. Meanwhile if Troye Sivan wore the same thing those same exact people (let's be real who they are, obnoxious straight girls) would just be like "lol he's such a twink" or "aw that's cute".

Point me to one fan who says that and we'll have this conversation.

[Exzime.]

2 minutes ago, 東京. said:

I completely agree. Labels are so restrictive and unnecessary. Humans like humans, so what. The end. 

How are labels so restrictive and unnecessary when the world is surrounded by hetero people  Removing labels means removing the realities of how gay people feel and their actual experiences. God knows if you're being sent China, Middle East or South Korea.... where homosexuality are being put under negative light and being straight is the norm    Here in Southeast Asia we have labelled spaces/area for gay people because you know it is NOT SAFE for you to be outside, other people do not understand your experience and how you feel. That's why labels are important. Y'all are so ignorant it's insane.

[lovedaddy]

11 minutes ago, 東京. said:

I completely agree. Labels are so restrictive and unnecessary. Humans like humans, so what. The end. 

worms for brain

gurl log off

[West Coast]

The insufferable 

[Headlock]

52 minutes ago, More Than A Melody said:

I, a queer woman,

 

 

This ain’t about you sis 

 

53 minutes ago, More Than A Melody said:

 You guys saw all the talk around cultural appropriation and blackfishing and ran to appropriate it yourself to queerness, when it’s literally a completely different story.

.

The is just *chef’s kiss*

 

54 minutes ago, More Than A Melody said:

.

 

 Nah, you can seethe. He’ll continue doing what he wants and he’ll be more and more successful and you either get it or you don’t. And at the end of the day you’re the one yelling to the void. Nothing you can say will hurt him. None of these threads will affect him in the slightest. Nothing twitter says touches him.

The fact that you literally just don’t get it and are literally proving multiple posters’ points by saying **** like this 

[Protocol]

16 minutes ago, Beyonnaise said:

The thing that annoys me over this whole situation doesn't even really have to do with Harry. It's that actual out and proud gay artists would never get the level of adoration and fervent cult-like fan support that he does. His stans are so annoying acting like him wearing glitter sometimes is incinerating gender norms. Meanwhile if Troye Sivan wore the same thing those same exact people (let's be real who they are, obnoxious straight girls) would just be like "lol he's such a twink" or "aw that's cute".

I feel like the only openly gay artist who managed to do that was Frank Ocean. But the music also was TOP TOP notch.

[brazil]

59 minutes ago, More Than A Melody said:

I, a queer woman, think you are bigoted for using the term “queer aesthetics” which… isn’t a thing. You guys saw all the talk around cultural appropriation and blackfishing and ran to appropriate it yourself to queerness, when it’s literally a completely different story.

 

Like saying that only gay people can play gay characters because of the talk about people of color playing roles of color.

 

Sexual identity is invisible. You can’t what someone identified as because of how they dress. You can’t tell if someone is queer or not because of their mannerisms or the way they speak or the shape of their face. So this whole conversation is absolutely ridiculous and based on nothing. Acting like pink and sparkles and dresses = queer is such a revoltingly outdated concept that I can’t understand how you’re shocked someone will call you bigoted.

This is so stupid. The fact that queer isn't a visible characteristics doesn't mean it's OK for people to pretend to be queer when they're not. Being bipolar isn't avisible characteristic, does that mean its ok for people to pretend to be bipolar for tiktok clout, like many have done?

 

Being queer means there are many inner experiences you go through and as a straight person you shouldn't appropriate that and you dont knoe what thats like. This isn't about looking or not looking queer, it's about the fact that he simply refuse to answer the question of whether he is queer or not and instead begs to give the "we're all humans" answer.

Edited April 26, 2022 by brazil

[Beyonnaise]

1 minute ago, More Than A Melody said:

Point me to one fan who says that and we'll have this conversation.

 

It's not the type of thing that dropping a link and saying "these three stans said the wrong thing here" would even best describe my point. My critique is more about the structural barriers for gay artists and straight artists having the cultural leeway to play the "hehe maybe im gay idk" guessing game, which allows them to reap the fun parts of gayness like glitter but not have to actually experience life as a man attracted to men. Why didn't Perfume Genius get Harry's level of rapturous fans who will fight to the death for him or Vogue covers when he released Set My Heart On Fire Immediately (an actual cutting-edge body of work by a gay man)? Most people have never even heard of him, because the large majority of actually gay artists are independent and don't get the level of visibility on a mainstream level as straight men who were heavily pushed in the industry as teen heartthrobs like Bieber, Charlie Puth or Harry.

[XtinaStripped]

If he wasn't doing this you'd all be complaining about him being another straight guy in a boring suit.

 

I get the feeling Harry has dabbled at the very least even if he is striaght. His sexuality doesn't need to be labelled if he doesn't feel like it.

[More Than A Melody]

12 minutes ago, inmymendes said:

ATRL is so problematic when it comes to Harry Styles and Shawn Mendes.

 

Harry: “I don’t need a label, I’m unlabeled, it’s my own personal life”

ATRL: “YOU ARE A STRAIGHT MAN! YOU QUEERBAITER!’” 

 

Shawn: “I’m not gay, I **** women”

ATRL: “YOU ARE GAY! YOU BOTTOM!” 

Basically this.

 

"Harry is not suffering backlash for expressing himself like openly queer men do, so I'm mad at him" is also ???? because he... does....?

 

 

 

 

Of course it's not to Lil Nas X levels, because Lil Nas X is more brash and is black... but to act like he's just cruising in life being praised by everyone and not attacked by anyone is just A LIE.

[inmymendes]

7 pages in 3 hours  

Edited April 26, 2022 by inmymendes

[Headlock]

15 minutes ago, More Than A Melody said:

. He also wrote explicit songs about sex with men.

Screaming