discussion The Depression Lounge

[Grumpy Cat]

someone pls break both of my legs so i dont go tomorrow for that shitty appointment to the incel god.

 

atrl did too much for me. if i go back there, its like a spit in everyones face. but then in my mind, i always give a 2nd change...

 

@Pendulum can u pls roast me and stop me? grill me pls

[TheArgonaut]

14 hours ago, Grumpy Cat said:

dead inside, thank you for your concern

Same babes, when are we ending it? Let’s make an appointment 

 

[TheArgonaut]

10 hours ago, Love Again said:

It's really exhausing to keep up with daily life. I have no idea how there are people who have a social life, go to school, have a sidejob, time for hobbies etc without completely collapsing. I get overwhelmed at the tiniest things. This isn't a way of living

I always think about this. University + job + social lives like… 

[Joyride]

this week has been awful… as I mentioned before my meds stopped working, and to be quite honest all I wanna do is disappear. I do not feel any sort of joy or happiness throughout the day, feels like every time I want to do something, something awful happens.

 

to think in December of last year, when all of this started I was finishing my degree and working in my field even before I graduated.

 

I’ve missed so much. I lost the job because I’m exhausted all day, I didn’t go to my graduation ceremony, I haven’t talked to

my friends in months and my parents hate me.

[Jotham]

On 9/7/2022 at 12:05 AM, TheArgonaut said:

Hey everyone, how are you guys doing? 
 

For the first time in a long while, my life is actually low-key getting better tbh. I finally got a job offer after my previous one got rescinded. In a way, I see my last offer getting rescinded as some blessing in disguise now because this new one seems so much better. I don't start until next month but I'm excited. It still feels surreal because I haven't felt like this in a while, like for such a long time I've just been unhappy with how my life is going that it feels weird to have something right going for once.

 

My mental health isn't perfect though, my anxiety has been skyrocketing for the past several weeks (so much catastrophizing) as I get ready for my new role but I've been coping with it through journalling and cognitive behavioral therapy. I also want to try mindfulness more so I'm considering getting Headspace.

 

I haven't posted here in a while but I've been keeping up with what people are posting, and I'll continue to keep everyone in my thoughts. I hope everyone is staying strong.

[its_britney_bitch]

I’m such an idiot. Repeatedly getting my hopes up that this guy will want to be more than friends, and despite how much time we spend together and how attracted we are to each other he just doesn’t see me as good enough to date. No matter how you put it that’s what it is lol.

 

It’s really backfired on me now. I had a depression **** phase and caught gonorrhea, I just got treated a few days ago but I’m still just… ashamed. I don’t wanna be one of those people that hooks up all the time and no matter how safe you are (I… wasn’t very this time) some STDs are just unavoidable.

 

I’m really beating myself up about it. I’d never had anything before, an HIV scare a couple years ago but it was negative thankfully. I’m grateful it’s not anything worse but still a little paranoid, I know HIV can take 3 months to show up and I got tested a month after my last hook up. My health anxiety is already way too bad to be hooking up with strangers anymore, but I just feel so out of control sometimes. And everytime I do something like this now I just think of the guy I have feelings for, how much better and safer I felt with him, how I can’t have that anymore so I resorted to looking for it with strangers.

 

I just feel like I’m kinda on a cliff edge rn and one thing could make me spiral and do something stupid

[Winged]

On 8/12/2022 at 4:03 AM, saucy said:

glad you're doing better now 

 

 

 

I've been in a slump. I was doing so well a couple months ago, but now this recurring health problem that I have to wait over a month to see the specialist for...and constant rejections for the jobs i've applied to are really starting to get to me. I'd just like something to go my way. It feels like I already lost so much of my youth to mental illness and now that i'm on an upward trajectory something happens to knock me down again. 

Thank you babes 

 

it is hard because we are living in times where only will get worse but what doesn’t kill you makes you…unhappy 

 

stay strong ladies

[Bloodflowers.]

Not really a depression (yet) but I am having anxiety and stress over my thesis. I should send it this week but my mentor keeps shipping it back and saying it's not good enough. Literally had another sleepless night this night over it. I don't know how I'm gonna feel if she crushes me and I have to pay another year in univetsity just to write a thesis I already wrote...

[despy]

i think i am in depression. this year has been the absolute worst for me so far and mentally i've never felt this bad ever. life has gotten worse since pandemic started and i've been sinking lower and lower every year but this year is truly something else since it's a new low for me. by far the worst year of my life. my mood has almost never been okay. the worst kind of anxiety & worries take over my brain, thoughts and feelings everyday and it prevents me from having a normal day, doing things a normal person do & reaching my full potential. i don't know if i'm gonna be able to take it anymore. it has gotten even worse this summer and my sleeping habits has become so unstable for the last couple of weeks. i'm awake at night and asleep most of the day. i feel worse and think worse. there are so many moments where i'm having certain thoughts too like . this year is the first year where i actually started thinking of doing it. my mental health is pretty much non-existent atp and i lost "feeling" things. i don't enjoy stuff anymore. feel like i don't have a reason to live. i mean there are so many reasons why i am the way i am atm but i just can't solve those problems and avoid those obstacles in my life. so many people my age are getting to live their lives freely/happily, getting to do whatever they want meanwhile i'm out here stuck, lonely, don't have any people who support me, not able to follow my dreams and still not able to find a ******* solution. or an opportunity to get myself out of this quicksand before it consumes me entirely. i don't really see a future for me i guess idk-

 

i thought i would keep it short but oh well

hope all of you are doing okay though.

[BigBangStan]

5 hours ago, despy said:

i think i am in depression. this year has been the absolute worst for me so far and mentally i've never felt this bad ever. life has gotten worse since pandemic started and i've been sinking lower and lower every year but this year is truly something else since it's a new low for me. by far the worst year of my life. my mood has almost never been okay. the worst kind of anxiety & worries take over my brain, thoughts and feelings everyday and it prevents me from having a normal day, doing things a normal person do & reaching my full potential. i don't know if i'm gonna be able to take it anymore. it has gotten even worse this summer and my sleeping habits has become so unstable for the last couple of weeks. i'm awake at night and asleep most of the day. i feel worse and think worse. there are so many moments where i'm having certain thoughts too like . this year is the first year where i actually started thinking of doing it. my mental health is pretty much non-existent atp and i lost "feeling" things. i don't enjoy stuff anymore. feel like i don't have a reason to live. i mean there are so many reasons why i am the way i am atm but i just can't solve those problems and avoid those obstacles in my life. so many people my age are getting to live their lives freely/happily, getting to do whatever they want meanwhile i'm out here stuck, lonely, don't have any people who support me, not able to follow my dreams and still not able to find a ******* solution. or an opportunity to get myself out of this quicksand before it consumes me entirely. i don't really see a future for me i guess idk-

 

i thought i would keep it short but oh well

hope all of you are doing okay though.

You just described how I've felt this entire year 

[Jotham]

Me looking back at my last post completely unaware that my anxiety was going to relapse harder than ever this week. Everything has just been so stressful these past couple of days. I finally cried for the first time in what felt like forever and it did help me calm down a bit.

[despy]

On 9/14/2022 at 6:43 AM, BigBangStan said:

You just described how I've felt this entire year 

hope you get better soon love

[The Witch]

On 9/13/2022 at 6:47 PM, despy said:

i think i am in depression. this year has been the absolute worst for me so far and mentally i've never felt this bad ever. life has gotten worse since pandemic started and i've been sinking lower and lower every year but this year is truly something else since it's a new low for me. by far the worst year of my life. my mood has almost never been okay. the worst kind of anxiety & worries take over my brain, thoughts and feelings everyday and it prevents me from having a normal day, doing things a normal person do & reaching my full potential. i don't know if i'm gonna be able to take it anymore. it has gotten even worse this summer and my sleeping habits has become so unstable for the last couple of weeks. i'm awake at night and asleep most of the day. i feel worse and think worse. there are so many moments where i'm having certain thoughts too like . this year is the first year where i actually started thinking of doing it. my mental health is pretty much non-existent atp and i lost "feeling" things. i don't enjoy stuff anymore. feel like i don't have a reason to live. i mean there are so many reasons why i am the way i am atm but i just can't solve those problems and avoid those obstacles in my life. so many people my age are getting to live their lives freely/happily, getting to do whatever they want meanwhile i'm out here stuck, lonely, don't have any people who support me, not able to follow my dreams and still not able to find a ******* solution. or an opportunity to get myself out of this quicksand before it consumes me entirely. i don't really see a future for me i guess idk-

 

i thought i would keep it short but oh well

hope all of you are doing okay though.

I feel exactly the same 

[despy]

On 9/16/2022 at 12:50 AM, The Witch said:

I feel exactly the same 

hope you get better soon as well love

[Beyondslay]

I feel like I'm losing passion for a lot of things in my life, I love music but I haven't produced or wrote anything in months, everything feels like a chore these days.  

[Grumpy Cat]

after i realized the whole hospital hates me for calling the inspection on them for not wearing masks at all and do all kinds of ****** up ****

 

the whole hospital hates me

 

last 2 hrs ive been trying to fall asleep but no amount of pills wont let me do it.

 

i want to sleep and never wake up

 

everybody hates me, i have no irl friends, i'm miserable - my life is not worth of living

[KFC]

I've been trying to rejoin society by getting a job but lord, I am EXHAUSTED  I went for an interview this morning and I was out of the house for two hours max but when I got home I was so tired I went straight back to bed. Pretty sure something is wrong with the hormones or my brain chemistry because I slept almost 4 extra hours but I'm still tired

[Lipgloss]

About to cancel my therapy session last minute and put my phone on DND. Will stop going altogether . 

[KFC]

Went for another interview today and they were SO unprofessional and rude. My anxiety is shot to pieces

[pixie_dust]

At this point, I know that I'll be dealing with random waves of depression until I'm an old lady.

[Grumpy Cat]

I'm on esketamine. The only thing that have me kept going on is helping @Joyride

 

Now I snort esketamine as a spray once every two weeks and trip my ass off. I feel like if they havent given me the spray, I wouldnt be writing this rn. It got that bad.

The workplace is unhuman and I pray I'm done with it asap.

 

 

[Joyride]

okay so I typed an essay and now I feel ******* stupid; long story short I need to get off my meds (trazodone, zolpidem and alrpazolam) and I feel like I'm probably hooked on all three so I'm scared as hell

 

is it even worth trying to quit at this point

[Joyride]

I wish I never touched these damn ******* pills I HATE IT

[Alldeezy]

With my 2 year relationship ending, and my only friend blocking me outta nowhere, my mental health hasn't been okay, im now poor and kinda wanna find a chilled job to do to get outta my rut of anxiety of leaving the house but even afraid i've left it too late since nobody will hire someone at my age that's never worked a day in my life, i've had days when I just wanna give up and end it, but only thing that pushes me through are my faves, people be like ew they don't know you why you gotta be obessesd but look if they weren't i wouldn't be alive, but life is getting really lonely for me now.  It i apply for a job i don't think i can lie about my age, i mean I can get away being 22.  the age thing is really getting to me, it's november next month while means thats another year added to me going nowhere in life! i'm really scared (most my family have passed on, i have no siblings, so i'm really scared) 

[Joyride]

okay so today was ******* awful and I'm finding it hard to keep killing myself out of my head, I am sick, trapped and about to go into a ******* legal battle