discussion The Depression Lounge

[ThousandMiles]

3 hours ago, flower moon said:

literally deleted both a couple of months ago. getting rid of tiktok was definitely good for me, although it was really hard to not just reactivate my account lol but i dont miss it at all now.

i struggled to delete insta for the same reason as you, but ultimately decided it was mostly a performative space and if anyone wanted to contact me/ see pics i took they could just  use whatsapp/ normal message app or something.

my mind is deffo calmer these days without them and its crazy how much more time i seem to have lmao.
glad i know less about other people too. why did i need all that.

 

what do you spend your time doing now? Any particular hobbies? When i’m not working I struggle to not wallow in boredom and start doom scrolling tiktok.  

[She-Rah]

I switched from Zoloft (100mg) to Wellbutrin XL (150mg) and it’s so much better. Zoloft was making me gain weight and too numb I didn’t recognize myself anymore. I couldn’t cry or feel any human emotions. It scared me so I asked if I could try Wellbutrin and it’s working so much better I guess cuz Zoloft targets your serotonin receptors while Wellbutrin targets your dopamine receptors. So it works sort of like a stimulant. It feels like a lighter version of adderall.

 

things I’ve noticed:

•Suppresses my appetite which is good for me because I need to lose weight.
•makes me super horny lol

•the first week was HORRIBLE tapering off Zoloft and getting my body to adjust to Wellbutrin. I was irritable af. Headache all day. Nauseous. 
 

has any of you tried or are currently taking Wellbutrin? Any tips? 
 

also seasonal depression is here. Be generous and kind to yourself. Sending you all love and best wishes

[flower moon]

On 11/6/2023 at 10:07 PM, ThousandMiles said:

what do you spend your time doing now? Any particular hobbies? When i’m not working I struggle to not wallow in boredom and start doom scrolling tiktok.  

i feel like im a pretty boring person tbh

Edited November 12, 2023 by flower moon

[KFC]

The combination of regular depression and seasonal depression is KICKING MY ASS omg. I'm sleeping for around 16 hours a day

[poki]

Was bored so ****** around with ATRL drama. Got attacked by Dua stans and Nidoqueen stans. Found out I'm considered the worst player ever in ATRL games section by some. Someone on here compared Clive Rosfield to Primeape. Was supposed to be tied to #1 in an ATRL game but didn't get a mention for that and I don't even want to point that out cause people hate me there anyways. Had another civil war with my family over stupid drama and now I'm laying under a tree outside staring at the sky. Perhaps December to early August was a fluke of joy for me and now it's back to the usual torment of life. 

 

[JoeAg]

well monday was the day! I’ve officially been fired from my band 

Spoiler

we had been together since september 2022, had never performed live, had only perfected 4 songs, and had barely made any progress. additionally, the other singer/songwriter in the band (who was our co-lead singer and rhythm guitarist) was always complaining about how my lyrics were too wordy or just not direct enough. she’s a diaristic lyricist, while i’m more heady and metaphorical, and that was always a problem for her. honestly I’m not sure if she ever even liked me! she’s kind of a miserable bully at the end of the day. our lead guitarist is her best friend and she’s not treated well by her tbh

so why am I upset? well for several reasons…

Spoiler

first of all, I’m super disappointed that this is how it ends considering it’s over text and it’s ONLY our lead guitarist who is saying anything 

second of all, that aforementioned member of my band who despises my musicality had blocked me on instagram the other week, right before halloween, which felt really dumb and petty

third of all, I feel like I still deserved another chance. I feel like I’m a good musician and at the LEAST a decent songwriter and as much as I love being a solo artist (my true calling tbh) being in a band was really challenging in a positive way for me. I felt like even though we hadn’t made a ton of progress, we still could’ve 

 

anf finally, and worst of all… I understand how it’s all my fault and how royally I f*cked up. I no call/no showed on a day when they wanted me to record

I dug my own f*cking grave here and yet I feel so conflicted like I still would want to continue. I feel some weird semblance that I deserve another chance even though it’s maybe justified that they kicked me out. my depression was bad already, considering I had a sh*tty breakup with my ex boyfriend at the beginning of october which is STILL affecting me

Spoiler

(considering he’s like a popular queer denver music scene community member lol so he’s friends with everyone or whatever and they don’t see that he’s a bully)

but now I feel the weight of having let down these three people. god and ALSO i’m still unemployed, which sucks major chode! I’m working out a lot, and I look pretty cute these days, but my depression is still bad 🫠

[JoeAg]

oh yeah and the reason I was actually fired was because I no call/no showed on a day when I was supposed to record my part of one of her songs. so yeah I will say I had this coming but I still feel like sh*t 

[poki]

Layed on the floor for like, 30 minutes. Don't want to get up. 

[Mr. Peanutbutter]

Y'all know those days you feel like doing nothing and just want the day to be over no matter what? Yep today is one of those

[monologueNacafe]

This is a neverending hell

[D.Va]

is there a thread specifically for medical issues ? 

[monologueNacafe]

On 11/9/2023 at 12:04 PM, monologueNacafe said:

This is a neverending hell

 

[Joyride]

the ***** is back and stronger than ever. switched meds and it just came back incredibly strong. I consulted with my psychiatrist today and he said I need to give the new meds a chance but I truly feel like k wording myself right now. the thoughts are there and won't leave.

[Diet Pepsi]

seasonal depression is beating my ass already  it feels like no matter what I do I’ll never be good enough for love & it’s so ******* exhausting 

[Devin]

my seasonal depression starting to kick in again.

[monologueNacafe]

today was bad

Edited November 15, 2023 by monologueNacafe

[EnigmaticAndroid]

Been on Naltrexone for a week, and while it's been helping my cravings for alcohol quite a bit (and tina a little), the side effects have been kinda 

 

I get stomach cramps on and off. There were a couple days where I had no appetite and felt sick to my stomach all day. And the mood changes have been the pits. I'm super irritable all the time and my depression is worse than it's been in a while. No motivation to do much of anything outside of my job at a restaurant. And the mood changes have been only getting worse.

 

I want to get in control of my substance abuse, and will stick it out for the month to see if everything starts to level out, but I'm kinda miserable rn.  At least my usage has started to go down a fair bit. 

Edited November 15, 2023 by EnigmaticAndroid

[loveisdead9582]

I have been trying my best to avoid getting meds subscribed from some doctors. I don’t like going to doctors/psychologists because of a lack of shared lived experiences. I don’t like being a victim but I need to talk to someone who gets some of what I’ve been through. 
 

so far I’ve been dealing and somewhat self medicating or whatever. I’m searching for a different doctor to talk to in state that I can actually connect with. I don’t want to feel like a victim or make myself out to be that. But I do need to talk to someone. If anyone has any suggestions of someone/apps to use for gay men, let me know. 

[Cannon]

Has anyone else had a problem finding a therapist? All of the ones I’ve reached out to never respond. I’ve tried leaving messages on their voicemail, filling out the online form and nothing! It’s even more challenging because I’ve been trying to find one that’s specialized in certain disorders. 

[Queen.]

I have no depression. I'm not agreeing with no wicked spirit 

[zasderfght]

35 minutes ago, Queen. said:

I have no depression. I'm not agreeing with no wicked spirit 

Umm... are you joking? 

[Queen.]

6 minutes ago, zasderfght said:

Umm... are you joking? 

Nope. There's a spiritual world out there that we don't see. And sometimes these spirits will try to play mind games in your head to cause you to feel a certain way. It's a spirit behind it, it can be your natural feelings but most of the time those spirits will intensify those negative feelings/energy.

[poki]

I had a meltdown over a new Sims 4 competitor called inZOI. It's developed in South Korea. So far the trailer and and early access footage doesn't showcase any gay romance and it really got under my skin. South Korea does not recognize gay relationships or allow gay couples to adopt which makes me terrified this game only allows straight relationships 

 

The lack of curly hairstyles and the slim body types also bothered me because Sims 4 tries so much to be inclusive which is really incredible, but a lot of people don't care for that and then this game gets revealed and people online are like, OMG SIMS 4 IS OVER. 

 

Had a public meltdown over it in the Sims base but I deleted my posts but now my OCD had a panic attack I'll get perma banned for spam / bashing the game too hard once Unorginal sees it cause mods can see hidden posts. 

 

Sims 4 seriously makes an impact on the LGBTQ+ community, so to see that a competitor doesn't seem to care about this, really makes me sad. 

And the fact that Sims 4 content creators are not harsh enough about this, always makes me very sad. 

Edited November 16, 2023 by Hey Dude
I mean harsh enough about the lack of inclusivity

[TicketOneWay]

I'm glad I found this thread

 

I miss the sun, the weather here is going to turn me into a shut in

[Gorjesspazze9]

I usually over work myself to avoid my depression. But my boss cut some of my hours this past week and I’ve been at home severely depressed. Realizing how pathetic and lonely my life actually is. Social media makes it worse, cuz you see how many people manage to hve a social life. I just go to work and go home to sleep everyday. I find no pleasure in life and have t been happy since I was a teenager.
On my off days i rarely go outside my house, and binge watch tv shows I grew up on. All my old friends feel like thousands of miles away. And I just watch thier stories but never engage because I assume they don’t even remember me. Same with family. The days feel like they pass by so fast and I accomplish nothing. Sometimes I go days without talking to anyone. Apart from my job. I haven’t talked to my best friends face to face since 2017. Last year I tried changing jobs and finding hobbies but I’m a failure at everything I do. I’m starting to think this is how life will always be. 

Edited November 16, 2023 by Gorjesspazze9