HeWon'tGo Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 Met a guy after chatting for like a week, spent a great time together, and then... ghosted. There was no indication whatsoever that he did not like me. Before I left, he hugged me, tickled me and said the next time would be at my place. I have sent a few messages and they were all read but no reply. I'm pretty sure at this point I got ghosted. This sucks. But well, it was a hookup after all. I shouldn't have felt attached. It is my fault. Just wish it could be a flat rejection instead. At least you have closure. But with this, you ended up in an endless cycle of wondering. Has anyone here had a similar experience? Could you cheer me up with some positive comments? :)
Popular Post Trash Posted July 19, 2023 Popular Post Posted July 19, 2023 You know where he lives, let's commit some vandalism on his ass. 3 13 1
fememeist Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 (edited) Stupid ass shouldn’t have hooked up you gays are so easy. If he ghosted you, that means you should stay single until you get to the mentality that you don’t need anyone else. Life’s too short to be simping over whores boo Edited July 19, 2023 by fememeist 1 8
Kummercell Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 yeah, happened to me recently. I was going out with him for about a month and then he just never replied to me again 2
Popular Post Aston Martin Posted July 19, 2023 Popular Post Posted July 19, 2023 Dealing with someone who is noncommittal and fake is a headache in the long run. Let yourself feel whatever emotions this situation has made you feel, but just remember that the trash took itself out. 17 2
FreeXone Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 (edited) He may already be dating someone. Chalk it up as his loss and move along. Ghosting IS the closure. If he wanted you he would write back. Men are a class chasers. If they want something they will go after it. I was ghosted once. Found out he had a girlfriend much later on. Edited July 19, 2023 by FreeXone 6
Big Bad Wolf Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 I’ve ghosted and been ghosted countless times. Especially when looking for hookups or trying to date. It’s just something that happens! If I don’t have an intention of seeing a hookup again or have a date that seemingly went well but I wasn’t really interested for one reason I another, I usually just go ghost. Rarely I’ve actually told the person why tbh. I’m not saying it’s right I’m just saying it’s less of a headache and you don’t feel invested especially if you’re meeting off apps and don’t have to be around that person again. With that said, people (I’m people for instance) ghost for such petty or shallow reasons at times. So I wouldn’t take it to heart at all. . 4
TheCheshireCat Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 Awwe don’t beat yourself up for “getting attached” it’s pretty hard when everything seems to be going well to not look towards a potential future with someone, only to have it all come crashing down. 1
Big Bad Wolf Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 6 minutes ago, FreeXone said: He may already be dating someone. Chalk it up as his loss and move along. Ghosting IS the closure. If he wanted you he would write back. Men are a class chasers. If they want something they will go after it. I was ghosted once. Found out he had a girlfriend much later on. This too. Again not saying it’s right just sharing my experience but I cheated on my ex boyfriend a few times….I never really met up with anyone more than 1-2 times max mostly because it was a sin of opportunity so I ghosted a lot of guys that way. Some I really liked but never wanted to get too invested because of my situation. 1
JoeAg Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 YES! several times in fact a lot of guys are just so wishy-washy and unaware of how to handle their feelings. they might reassess things and be like "ok but can I do better?" and it's f*cking sh*tty but that's oftentimes a thought process. I can't say I haven't ghosted as well, I totally have. I stopped doing it this year though, I figure since I'm 26 now I can do way better than that. I hate being ghosted, but it's honestly a part of modern dating. it just goes to show, you can be cute, charismatic, talented, smart, interesting, have beautiful hair, and still guys will think ghosting you is acceptable until they figure out their sh*t, or just without ever returning! it's so depressing typing it out this way, but guys just really do that a lot. and... idk if I want to get fully into it right this second but yknow there's definitely something to be said about toxic masculinity and ghosting potential partners 😬 ... don't beat yourself up over it though! it's a matter of trying, of pulling yourself up by your bootstraps and realizing that they missed out on something special 1
zasderfght Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 (edited) 19 minutes ago, HeWon'tGo said: Met a guy after chatting for like a week, spent a great time together, and then... ghosted. There was no indication whatsoever that he did not like me. Before I left, he hugged me, tickled me and said the next time would be at my place. I have sent a few messages and they were all read but no reply. I'm pretty sure at this point I got ghosted. This sucks. But well, it was a hookup after all. I shouldn't have felt attached. It is my fault. Just wish it could be a flat rejection instead. At least you have closure. But with this, you ended up in an endless cycle of wondering. Has anyone here had a similar experience? Could you cheer me up with some positive comments? Yep. For years until I met my boyfriend. And don't get me wrong: he could ghost me too. Nothing's guaranteed in this world. It's gonna suck because we all wanna experience love. If we don't experience love in any capacity (etc self-love, kinship love, familial love), what's the point of living? I'm not gonna write my novels on ATRL about relationships because people probably don't care lol but if you have questions or need to vent, you can inbox me. I can share some dating tips & how I got over needing to feel like I needed a partner all the time. Edited July 19, 2023 by zasderfght 1
SimpleKindofLife Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 It’s a good thing that he didn’t waste more of your time but yeah it’s very immature to ghost. Maybe he’s not comfortable with his sexuality yet (assuming you’re both guys). 1
imabadkid Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 15 minutes ago, fememeist said: Stupid ass shouldn’t have hooked up you gays are so easy girl I’ve done the making them wait effort too and once they get what they want they’re on to the next one so that one doesn’t work either. for some reason I attract guys who are perpetually horny and want to f*ck anything with a hole… women… men… anything. I’m over it.
Digitalism Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 One guy did it to me. Years later he told me it was because he just didn't want a relationship at the time In my case sometimes I have a great time but i'm just not that into that person. And when I sense that the other person is really into me and I'm not I just tell them because I know how awful it is to fall for someone that doesn't care enough. I feel like some people ghost in situations like that to avoid the confrontation. 1
teresaguidice Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 ghosting is weak, but you likely wouldn't have all that much closure if you got a generic "i think you're really cool but i don't think we're compatible" or whatever. rejection feels bad however its presented. you'll get over this very fast though. 1
GentleEarthquake Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 He's immature, you're better off without him. Don't let it get to you 1
GentleEarthquake Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 5 minutes ago, Juanny said: And we reject nice men because they're "boring". The way this is so true you could say my current best friend is boring as hell but he's actually the nicest guy i've met 1
Cheers Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 He most likely has someone else this tends to be why they run away after having a good time. don’t beat yourself up, king! You’ll find better 1
EdgeofTeeth Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 I’ve discovered this the name of the game when it comes to dating in NYC. Texting regularly, one or two dates where you have a great time together, and then you never hear from them again 2
ATRL Moderator feelslikeadream Posted July 19, 2023 ATRL Moderator Posted July 19, 2023 The best first date I ever had ended with him ghosting afterwards He was seemingly very interested and ended the date saying he couldn't wait to show me his hometown sometime nnnn. Then when I was driving home from the date, he sent me a voice note (on Hinge) talking about how glad he was he went on the date, how cute I am in person, etc. But the next day: SILENCE. Never answered a message from me, unmatched me, GONE. The lesson: men are stupid. So don't fear sis, it happens to everyone who likes men. 2
HASHTAGPOW Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 He's married with 2 children and a grandchild I fear
Hi-res Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 49 minutes ago, fememeist said: Stupid ass shouldn’t have hooked up you gays are so easy. If he ghosted you, that means you should stay single until you get to the mentality that you don’t need anyone else. Life’s too short to be simping over whores boo 3
Power love Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 i think you're really cool but i don't think we're compatible. Is that hard? I’m sure you will probably run into him again at some bar or club. In the future don’t give it up so easily. Clearly he got what he wanted then next! 1
FreeXone Posted July 19, 2023 Posted July 19, 2023 1 hour ago, SimpleKindofLife said: It’s a good thing that he didn’t waste more of your time but yeah it’s very immature to ghost. Maybe he’s not comfortable with his sexuality yet (assuming you’re both guys). Sometimes it is easier to ghost. I one time tried to explain to a guy why I wasn't interested and it got VERY NASTY LOL
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